How did I get here? From Bible student to baby missionary

by Faithful Witness 21 Replies latest jw friends

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  Faithful Witness

  Thanks, comatose.

  I recently had another email exchange with my mom. It was another heartbreak, of course. I am so disappointed right now. I am still having a hard time coming to realization that they really believe this garbage. My parents are not your typical JW target, but got sucked in by my sister, who blackmailed my mom into attending meetings or not seeing my niece. Somehow, this led to my father, a once successful salesman, getting into a pissing contest with my brother in law... Literally, who can be the better JW? My once thinking, know it all, and stubborn father sent an email last year, to the entire family. "My top priority in life is to be a Good Jehovah's Witness." (In light of that goal, he has take a stand for my JW sister and emphasized the enormous rip in our family now). I think he is racing with my BIL, to see who can get more privileges and who will be crowned as an elder first.

  Since they recently moved three prominent elders out of their thriving congregation, it will be interesting to see how things progress for them. My mom sent an email, hinting that things were changing and she seemed confused about the special meeting this weekend, and disappointed to see her friends she so dearly loves, being moved to another cong. When I asked her more about it, she quickly closed her mind and assured me that she will always make time for her JW friends, before she will for my children. It's really sad to see her miss their childhood. My kids happen to be extra cool. ;)

  Today, I have no tolerance for this rude behavior. I wil forgive (again and again), but I am getting weary from the heartbreak.
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  nonjwspouse

  Something I learned the hard way, is that the only way to get a JW to listen is to make sure their guard is down. Once you do thing or say things that gets the guard up, it is close to impossible for them to listen.

  Questions..... lots of them, in non agressive ways. Sometimes not even expecting an answer, but just planting the seed....

  Planting seeds by commenting with your opinion on parellel things, not mentioning the WT or JW at all, but when something similer happens in say, another cult/high control religion, or government or an MLM, anything like that. Try to use a current event to look like you are nnot searching for things to talk about. Don't fall into comparing, let their own minds do that. I can see it on my husbsand's face when he begins to see the comparason, and it is highly uncomfortable for him. That is a goal. The need to be uncomfotable about thier own thoughts, but not recognise, or attach it to you.

  It is a painfuly slow, tedious and exausting process. It might not even work. But once a real seed of doubt takes hold then the rest falls into place as you saw youraelf.

  I still await my husband's eventual choice. It is emotionally unbearable for me sometimes. I am working on that for myelf. I refuse to allow my life to be contolled by his decision on baptism, if that is what he chooses.