The other day I sent my family a framed studio photograph that I had made for them.
I called to make sure they got it and my mom said that she did and that it was placed with the other family photos in the living room.
A few days later my dad called to thank me. He then went off into a tangent about how he wants me to come back to the "truth". [wincing] I told him that I would never return the to organization - never. I told him that I respect his right to believe as he will, but I expect the same in return. (This is the delicate truce that has existed in my family since I left - I don't intend to rock the boat).
He went on about how he has had to humble himself to gods arrangements...
A little history: He was removed from being an elder after helping my aunt who was being beaten and mentally abused by her husband (a brother in good standing) - my dad was later made an elder again after everything settled down. As he said, he had to humble himself to "god's arrangements" - apparently that involves "waiting for jehovah" to stop a psycho from beating his wife. My aunt ended up having to commit adultery so that she could divorce the man. Last I heard she is happily remarried, but my cousins (moved out) are all f***ed up in the head. My x-uncle had several strokes and is now barely able to get around. I won't even get into the ugly custody battle that split the congregation down the middle and evolved kidnapping one of the kids across state lines and hiding her in the woods.
Once he "waited on jehovah" and let all of this happen he was finally let back in as a elder.
He also went on about how "the scene of the world is changing" and we are getting close to the end... bla bla bla.... He had a very worried and stressed tone in his voice. He REALLY believes the crap the bOrg teaches. He REALLY does.
He told me that he had contacted a local congregation and told them about me and where I lived. I about hit the ceiling I was so mad! I moved 400 miles to get away from the JWs and in one phone call from my parents they knew where I lived again. I told him that I did not want them to contact me. He said that he told them that I didn't want to be contacted, but they might contact me out of love. [wincing again]
Ever since I left the bOrg he has changed. He looks at me differently. He talks to me differently. He always has an air of stress and worry - like a broken animal. Especially after “he humbled himself to gods arrangements” and let the elders “adjust his thinking”. He goes on about how he blames himself, how he failed me somehow.
I hate to see him torment himself like that. Why can’t he just let go and accept me for who I am?
I try to do something nice and this is what I get... betralay by my parents and f***ed up nerves. It took me a long time to start to forget about what I experienced in the bOrg, now I'm back at square one.
Damn I'm pissed!
"As every one knows, there are mistakes in the Bible" - The Watchtower, April 15, 1928, p. 126
Believe in yourself, not mythology.