Why does Joel Vacillate? G rated

joelbear

Nathan asks why I vacillate back and forth in my feelings regarding the Watchtower Society. I thought I would answer that in a thread of its own.

I love the ideals of Jehovah's Witnesses. A united human society where everyone does the best they can and helps others do the best they can to serve God.

I hate my real life experiences with Jehovah's Witnesses where people were all over the board, some great people, dedicated to their beliefs, others living double lives, others very materialistic, basically living like everyone else in the world which they condemned. To me it was either all for one and one for all or nothing. I just couldn't and can't buy into this inequality of dedication and believe that the people are really united.

I love my friends and family who are still witnesses and ache, to the depths of my heart and soul, to see them again, to laugh with them again. They will never know how much I love them and miss them.

I hate the idea of having to pretend to be someone I am not in order to be acceptable to the people I love.

I love the idea of a paradise earth where mankind can blossom and grow.

I hate the idea that billions would have to die in order for this to occur.

I love the logic behind witness beliefs on who God is, the ransom sacrifice, no eternal torment, why wickedness exists and many other basic doctrines.

I hate the illogic of 1914, the proposed justice system of who gets resurrected and who does not get resurrected or destroyed or not destroyed and other doctrines related to the hierarchy of creation and redeemed creation.

I myself cannot group "the Watchtower Society" into one constructed whole of a thing to hate or to love. It is many things at once, some good, some bad. For me the bad continues to outweigh the good, although I can understand why some attach themselves to the good parts of the system and ignore the bad.

I can't really explain it further unless I try to explain my whole concept of Lifeism, which is my belief system.

But, I will probably always have mixed feelings about not being a witness for the main reasons given above.

Joel

teejay

Maybe over the last few months you’ve begun to see that you and I have a lot in common? I mean mentally... MENTALLY!!, Joel!! In our outlooks, our views toward the Organization... aw.... you know what I mean! *whew, wiping sweat from my brow*

Point is... I understand.

I also love many of the people who are still very loyal to the borg, people I never see, people who are uncomfortable speaking to me if I run into them in public – and I’m not even df’d. I like the idea of a paradise where a mighty god of love and peace will step in and answer all our problems. Like I said... I understand what you said and hold no malice toward the Organization or its people as some do.

I had a dream once. It was beautiful... just like you’d imagine a very wonderful dream to be. I’ll spare you the details—they wouldn’t mean much to you—but, the thing is... it’s a doggone shame that I had to wake up. But I did. I had to wake up and when I did, the dream became what it always was.

A dream.

TexSham

I for one will not click on the link joel if you do decide to explain you concept of "lifeism"

Perry

I appreciated your frankness Joelbear. I too long or the utopia, that I believe is withn the human capacity to experience, Where so many of us diverge is the method to get there. I don't mind a good fight. It's hard to know exactly what to fight for nowadays. I would much rather learn peace though....without the human agendas.

My personal axe to grind is why Christ left. I would have followed him into the depts of hell. I am a natural leader. But, I can tell you truthfully that the overwhelming joy of following someone qualified is far surpasssing in fulfillmet.... Know what I mean?

I miss the following aspects of the WBTS. Survival dictates otherwise. The emotional oneness that we are all capabable of...that is my greatest aspiration. I hope to see you there where ever that is.

SYN

Paradise sounds bloody boring to me. Crime is so exciting after all!

JB, as usual, their dreams are incredibly beautiful, but the reality of humanity is somewhat more dismal.

Seven006: "Have you tried drugs? Shooting up a little heroin might do the trick, it's hard to type when your stoned out of your mind. I don't know how TR does it!"

Francois

Don't all Christian religions in some form or fashion contemplate some form of Utopia? Of course, I refer to the more liberal, modern, contemplative, intelligent religions. I'm NOT referring to the snake handling, strychnine drinking, rolling 'round on the floor type, nor those that are caught up in the spirit and speak in tongues, or believe in a literal hell.

And some eastern religions hold much truth. I'm thinking now about the original form of Taoism, as found in the Tao Te Ching, which advocated aligning one's self with the Tao, the pattern of the universe. Written 600 B.C., it's likely the first advice to "go with the flow."

Francois

DakotaRed

I think mankind in general longs for a Utopian Paradise and the Watchtower uses it to it's fullest. Where mainstream religion uses the threat of eternal hellfire and torture, if you don't follow their rules, the Watchtower uses the threat of missing out on Utopia, which so many desire to see.

I pray that Paradise is true and will happen, but I don't fear eternal torment and torture any longer. However, I have come to realize that the Watchtower won't get one to Paradise. They are the modern day Pharisees as they themselves teach: "Ecclesiastes 8:9 All this I have seen, and there was an applying of my heart to every work that has been done under the sun, [during] the time that man has dominated man to his injury."

Who makes it I leave in the hands of God and His Son, no one else.

If God's Spirit is filling a Kingdom Hall, how is it that Satan can manuever the ones within that Kingdom Hall at the same time?

bluesapphire

Joelbear, what happened to your website?

larc

Joel,

It seems to me, that when someone longs for something that can't be, they are creating their own unhappiness. I left many friends who were JWs, and the only time I see them is at funerals. They are nice to me, but I know that we will never be pals who socialize. Such is life. That is true of many worldly high school friends, as well. I moved to another city and never saw these people again, except at my 20 year high school reunion. Over the years, many people come and go, and only a few have stayed in my life the whole time. As far as Witnesses go, my own sister barely spoke to me for 15 years. I didn't like that but I was prepared to accept it. After a family crisis, we became close again, and I talk to her on a regular basis. Now, if she gets direction from the WT to become more militant, she may stop talking to me again. If she does, I won't like it, but I am prepared to accept it. That's life. I have enough other people in my life that I will be just fine.
In oter words, I see no point in dwelling on what I can't have. All that does is make me feel bad, and it accomplishes nothing of value. I try to keep my mind focused on what I can have and what I can change for the better. It works for me.

joelbear

Blue,

I took it down when I got laid off in January. I may put it back up later this year.

Larc,

I can hear what you are saying and accept it logically, but my heart will never let go of the love I have for my friends and family that are witnesses. I'll just have to live with the heartache. Its part of what makes me me.

hugs

Joel

Why does Joel Vacillate? G rated

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