by dissonance_resolved 14 Replies latest jw friends
I'm about 4 months into my fade- things were going ok at first. If I didn't get ready to go to the meeting or FS, neither did my family.
I'm interested in your first comment. It appears that Hubby liked the idea at first and then feelings of guilt took over. I think Hubby IS someone you can work with. Do you and him talk/chat/socialize? Also... how much of this is leaving/fading from the JWs and how much of this is a marital issue?
Your question reminds me of an experience I had a few years ago-- you never now what is really inside the head of a JW.
Take a poll- ask people if they would rather have the truth or a lie to their questions-- unfortunately, more times than not, true words are not kind words.
http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/experiences/127598/1/My-old-KH-had-a-personal-visit-from-me-today
You have received great advice here, but the bottom line is: don't let your children be raised in a cult. You are there mother and protect them, momma bear.
I do think there is hope for my hubby, which is why I've been playing the waiting game. It would be much better for our children and our marriage if we were on the same page about this. If it's a matter of waiting a few more months and having him wake up, it seems worthwhile to not draw the line in the sand now. Our marriage has not always been the greatest, but has actually improved since I've woken up since I'm more relaxed and happier in general. I think he sees that and is trying to figure it out. I think I just need to decide on a time frame of how long to wait- I've been thinking of September when we study the new light in the WT- keep it sporadic til then and just not go back. Do everything I can between now and then to help hubby wake up and then just leave it in Jehovah's hands (lol, thought stopper!). Also, I'm trying to keep things as normal as possible for my kids, school activities and friends and so forth, and have been asking them lots of questions to get them thinking. Oy, wish me luck, I'm going to need it! (Still the twinge of guilt about referring to luck...)
Have an affair, end it and stop acting like some majoy explosion is not on the horizon that will rock your world soon. Fade it good! But when you are both not on the same page, it is like watching the fuse burn to the bomb you have seen explode a million times. If you need an affair, I am open minded and very talented.
