A CRACKERJACK religion: the Watchtower Society

by Terry 22 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • Terry

    Did you ever buy a box of Crackerjacks?

    Popcorn with caramel on it.

    It had a gimmick, however, that really pushed sales and kept it popular decade after decade.

    Crackerjacks had a Prize hidden inside!

    What fun to eat caramel popcorn just to get that stupid prize!

    Well, JW theology is really like that.

    Most of the stuff is sticky and has no food value.

    What the true believers are really after is that hidden prize! NEW LIGHT!

    From the very beginning, it was a whole lotta bible study crapola just to get to the good stuff: PYRAMIDOLOGY and PROPHETIC ARMAGEDDON DATE!

    A gimmick for the weak of mind.

    The last time the Watchtower religion hid a nice prize in their crackerjack box it bit them on the ass!!

    1975! It lodged in everybody's windpipe and left them gagging and heaving for years to follow!

    They haven't been the same since they stopped hiding that MAGIC DATE FOR THE END OF THE WORLD deep inside the sticky popcorn.

  • wha happened?
    wha happened?

    or maybe the popcorn isn't an attraction anymore. That caramel is full of high fructose corn syrup. The world is on to that poison now

  • james_woods

    I think I have a Little Orphan Annie decoder wheel somewhere...

  • Finkelstein

    A lot of JWS died never receiving the promised prize which was on the front label.

    The WTS. leaders today know of this and they're getting a bit nervous and edgy about the promises their

    organization have been making for over a century.

  • breakfast of champions
    breakfast of champions

    Now it's just stale, sticky porcorn and about five peanut pieces per box.

    Honestly, I was just thinking about Cracker Jacks the other day. Do they still sell this crap? Or did it go the way of the Twinkie?

  • Momma-Tossed-Me

    Religious people seek a reward...spirital people seek truth. JW's look for the big payout at the end. They are but as babes sitting in a high chair being spoon fed.

  • breakfast of champions
    breakfast of champions

    Religious people seek a reward...spirital people seek truth.

    I like that!

  • Tater-T

    with out a date the whole thing really doesn't work.............

    Why go out in service?... because the end is near?

    I't's their Brand..... Date's....

    But why they don't just give up? I don't know because they sure do suck at it!

    L8R T8R

  • ziddina
    "Honestly, I was just thinking about Cracker Jacks the other day. Do they still sell this crap? Or did it go the way of the Twinkie?" BOC

    They still sell Cracker Jacks ™, but you could do a lot better with some of the 'gourmet' popcorn mixtures nowadays...

    From: http://www.blaircandy.com/crja24.html?gclid=CMye2cawkbQCFQpgMgod-1oA-A

    Cracker Jacks 24ct

    Cracker Jacks 24ct


    Item #: 32340 Our price: $13.95


    item description </form> The best of the bunch when you’re looking for a treat that’s salty and sweet, Cracker Jack has been making mouths smile for over 100 years! A must-have for baseball games, Cracker Jacks are also perfect for everyday snacking, with delicious caramel coated popcorn and peanuts awaiting you inside each bag. The prizes inside have changed over the years, but rest assured there’s a small something to open in each!

    • The Original Cracker Jacks you love!
    • Made by Frito-Lay
    • 24 bags per order
    • Each bag is packed with 1.4oz of Cracker Jacks

    Chocolate Drizzle This specialty popcorn is a must for sweet treat connoisseurs. We start with our super crunchy, secret-recipe Caramel popcorn enhanced with brown sugar and molasses and then drizzle it with rich chocolate for an exceptionally high-quality snack. Order your Drizzled Caramel corn today and see why we've been the 'popcorn authority' for more than 30 years!'

    From: http://www.thepopcornfactory.com//CategoryDisplay?storeId=10201&urlRequestType=Base&categoryId=3400000028&langId=-1&catalogId=10101

  • moshe

    Who needs a Cracker Jack decoder ring, when you have the Governing Body on your side! Meat in due season that cures all your ills and makes you feel like a million dollar bill.

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