by I Want to Believe 16 Replies latest jw friends
Leaving WT made a good point,"It's not a race."
It's a process,and it takes time. It's all we've known our whole lives. It takes time to heal,and to figure things out.
But,the difference is,we get to make our own choices,and live life now,instead of ,waiting on a fantasy.
IWTB: Re-reading my comment i dosnt sound like i intended it to. My point was that you and your wife has been exposed for many years to thinking a certain way about god, making him into this rather abusive character who will punish you if you dont think, feel and behave the way the watchtower want you to.
that takes a long time to fix for most. It is not rational that you are concerned about buying a present for your son, or that your wife (whom i assume have doubts herself) cannot think of worshipping god outside the organisation. I really hope you take leavingwts advice and read one of Hassans books, they explained a lot of these things to me.
At any rate when you are buying evil apostate christians books for your son, if a member of your family sees them it will give your fade a "false religion" flavor. if you are doing it to show your wife you can raise your child christian without the WTS, religious-themed material, and religious ideas which are not quite formulated the way the WTS formulate them, is exactly the type of thing she has a programmed (irrational) response for which they are likely to trigger.
I agree with Leaving. Take some time to get to know yourself. Take some time to breathe. God and Christ have not gone anywhere. You can ask for guidance and patience. Don't force it.
Peace to you,
Tammy
that's nice expression.
I WANT TO BELIEVE- A lot of us have been where you are at. The suggestion by posters to read Steve Hassans two books, " Combatting Cult Mind Control " & " Releasing the bonds - Empowering People to Think for Yourselves " is a very good suggestion. It will assist you in understanding what is causing you confusing feelings. You can enjoy your freedom without being fearful, but you need to inform yourself about what CAUSES us ex-Witnesses to keep having these fears or phobias . Good luck to you. Please remember we are here for you. Hang in there, Peace out, Mr. Flipper
Hello "wanna believe"......
I too live in a very small town knowing everyone and spent my whole life inside til 14 years ago. My husband and I were actually dfd for standing up to them and trying to share what holy spirit showed us to reveil they were not who they say they are nor teach truth.
We knew we would be thrown out but not without a huge witness aginst them, whether or not they chose to see it at the time or not. Somewhere, sometime, someONE WILL and it will all be worth it for us! Our three sons have now all grown up and we are truly blessed as parents to still have god-fearing children who do normal things but are good kids. We never blamed Jah for this was our choice at some point in our life to make the "so-called " truth our own after we grew up in the org. We now read the Bible as a mirror and not a window for the WTBS and boy do things open up when you see what they profess and yet what they actually are doing. After all, don't they call themselves "the truth" with true israel leading a great crowd of sheep and are in a covenant for only them.
John 14-17 really helped us see and give way more credit to our lord and master than we were ever taught. Everything was jehovah and not much about the HUGE role Jesus plays.
Jeremiah and the other prohets' writings were a real eye opener. And always remember they taught us to be able to supposedly worship not needing a structure (visible temple) something they totally rely on WTBS. But to walk by faith, not sight, worship with Spirit and Truth, keep our eyes not on what is seen but what is unseen, the kingdom of the heavens. They also told us only 144,000 can eat and drink and be in the new covenant. NOT TRUE! They shut up the kingdom by preaching this. Matthew 23;13
John chapter 6 says different. So does 1Corinthians 10:1-5. ONE HOPE, One FAITH One Baptism.
We as a family have never been happier to be released from THEIR bondage and to become slaves of a much more loving master and to do HIS will and remain as spiritual virgins without religion. (belonging to another husband,head, owner)
justathought
justmom
"As a born-in, I don't know how to start over, since I've never thought of what my life would be like otherwise. I've never wanted to celebrate holidays (and still don't), and can't really change my life in other ways since I have my family, and most of my life choices are still binding (which feeds the mid-life crisis feeling, my "bloom of youth" having been squandered). And it's especially hard trying to fade in a town where "spies" are everywhere. When I was buying my JW contraband, I kept looking over my shoulder--this is a town where it's easy to run into someone you know at the store. "
Hello 'I Want To Believe'.....I could have written exactly the same a few years back , in fact I probably did. As others have said, it does get easier in time. The family and congo adjust to treat you either as a nut or a lost sheep, so they no longer expect the same - provided that you have faded slowly and successfully.
Just hang in there taking little steps and it will all be fine.
