Shy JW at the door ... the pain of it

by MrMonroe 36 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • steve2
    steve2

    It's not so much shyness but a feeling of being unwelcome
    You nailed it.

    Actually, extremely good point. I hadn't thought of it quite like that! Let's just say that some witnesses weren't as sensitive to social cues of being unwelcome, so didn't appear so fazed by it. I registered every nuance of facial expression of householders - and realized as a veryyoung boy that by farthe majority of householders did not want to talk -except the occasional fundamentalist who wouldn't let us go!

  • MrMonroe
    MrMonroe

    Thanks for all your comments.

    I think many shy JWs, and those of us who simply didn't want to be out there imposing ourselves on people on their Saturday mornings because we'd been told to, responded with the quietest doorknocks we could manage. My figuring was, if they couldn't hear us, well, hell, there was no point in staying there, it was best to just move on. The more doors you could cover without having someone open it, the better the day it was.

    The organisation may brag about how it takes the "good news" to every household, but I'm betting a huge percentage of publishers (and probably many pioneers) are far more concerned with filling in time rather than actually contacting people. Shy JWs, and young kids, would certainly be in no hurry to find someone at every door.

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    It matters not whether you are timid. People don't want to make fools out of themselves--and the surest way to do that is to preach an outdated religion. Back in the 1980s, it was reasonable--even though even then quite a few people didn't want anything to do with that religion. Even then, it would turn off more people than anything else. These days, it's even worse because anyone could research the religion in 15 minutes, and the scam is more likely to be exposed. It also shuts down whatever little opportunity you might chance to get in the world to better oneself.

    And it's even worse if you are easily intimidated. Going to the door with such a message is a ticket to lost opportunities as it is. But, when you are uncomfortable approaching people at their own homes, doing so all day every day doesn't make it any better. That is like forcing someone that is deathly scared of snakes to handle snakes all day long. You dread getting up even more than normal (as is, it is a drudgery and wastes time, and causes one to lose social and business opportunities). Then, you get to the door--when a door gets slammed in your face, your fears are reinforced. Worse, when you reach a door where someone pushes a printout of proof that the religion is a scam right in your face, threatens you with a dog or gun, or calls the management of the apartment complex on you. Then, throw in a pious-sneer or hounder partner, and you are forced to get that householder to take the study.

    Another bad thing is when conditions at a call make you sick. I saw one guy that came out, spitting blood into a mayonnaise jar at regular intervals, when I got dragged into that call. Plenty of people have gone to houses where roaches crawled into their circus bags or their purses. Or, rats and mice were running around houses. I myself have seen my share of filth, usually dirty dishes piled to the ceiling in the sink or dirty clothes piled up a meter or two high on the couch. Or, yards that are absolutely rubbish--bare dirt with nothing more than a chain link fence, or that has rubbish (often cigarette butts) that seems to be at least 10 centimeters deep. Other things I have seen were other men (always just plain men) trying to pick me up, partners getting mooched out of cigarette money in the guise of food money, men that have at least a dozen different prescription bottles on the table when I was dragged in, and people smoking non-stop while we were at the door.

    Not to mention trying to defend the faith. When I was in, trying to get the person into the cancer was a priority. Usually, they wouldn't budge on their religion. The best were the Catholics that made it clear that they were going to die Catholic. I heard other denominations that would push their own beliefs, often as vehemently as I was supposed to be pushing mine, on me. Back then, we were supposed to make a good attempt to rebut their beliefs (now, the witlesses are much wussier and will run from such a discussion). And, if they had a question, you had to do the work and research the Washtowel publications to get answers before they got answers from other sources. (These days, when they can type it into a search engine, you have to already answer the question or run from the confrontation).

  • tornapart
    tornapart

    When I've been out knocking on doors we've been told not to accept a 'no' from someone.. and try to get over their objection. I HATE this! If someone says no they mean NO! If someone comes to my door selling something and I say I don't want it then I expect them to respect that. The same curteousy should go to people JWs call on. They are UNINVITED. To work with someone in the 'FS' who doesn't repect others rights to say no makes me cringe! A smile and a 'sorry to disturb you', is much more effective than try to force your religion on someone who doesn't want it.

  • MrMonroe
    MrMonroe

    I agree, Tornapart. I think we have all been at doors with Witnesses who didn't read the cues and pressed on, leaving us squirming. I worked with a particularly dogmatic and argumentive brother many times; on one occasion the householder opened the door and said, "If this is about religion, I'm not interested." The brother with me said, "No, it's not religion" and then started with his little sermon. The householder, understandably, got pissed off and told us to leave. As we walked away, I asked this brother, "Why did you say you weren't talking about religion?" His answer, in the best Rutherfordian way, was: "It's not about religion. It's about the Bible."

  • tornapart
    tornapart

    LOL! MrM.. I've had my share of those too! When I was a teen I worked with one older brother, actually a very nice brother (till he went knocking on doors).. used to put his foot over the doorstep, try to stop them closing it and once they had he would stand there talking to a closed door! LOL! CRINGE!!

  • Reopened Mind
    Reopened Mind

    I remember being told that if you don't like field service then you don't go out enough. So I signed up to pioneer, first auxiliary then regular. Well I liked it for a while mostly because we pioneers were told we were an elite group. I admit I liked that. But that soon wore off as the drudgery of the day to day door knocking became ever harder to do. Before long it became clear that all my hard work did not result in many converts. I was a convert although not as a result of the door-to-door work so I probably held on to the possibility of results longer.

    Quendi, working with someone like you made my job much easier. I felt like I could relax somewhat and let you carry most of the conversation, with adding an occasional scripture or comment.

    I have worked with the die-hard, don't take "no" for an answer publisher. When one householder threatened to call the police on us the sister I was working with replied, "We''ll wait right here till they come".

    Reopened Mind

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit