Is this any way to get a convert??

tenyearsafter

I have relayed how "broken" my mother is when it comes to reasoning on her beliefs as a JW...and my not believing the JW story any longer as an ex-JW. It seems to be a common story of cognitive dissonance, etc., etc,

Now comes a classic new angle that really has me scratching my head. My wife and I were visiting my mother (which we do weekly since no one other than my brother and I do...and I am DF'ed!), and I ran out to pick some things up for my mom, leaving my non-JW wife alone with my mom. My wife is a Christian, and my mom has always felt she could convert her to the JW way of thinking. As soon as I left the house, my mom immediately launched in to a tirade of how bad I was, that I am evil and a traitor to Jah, that my ex-wife was wonderful and put up with incredible hardship with me and that I was going to be destroyed at the big A! My wife was stunned at first and that soon turned to anger at the two faced attack on me behind my back. I have come to expect that odd double standard since leaving the JW's, but my wife was so angry she could barely speak after the one-sided "discussion".

If the intent was to "woo" a new convert, it was as far from the mark as it could be. If anything, my mom pretty much assured that my wife would NEVER accept JW's as a possible life choice. By the way, the minute I came back with her items from the store, she became the sweet mother again doting on her son. That really got to my wife!

Has anyone else had a similar experience with their loved ones, or is my mom just a special case of crazy?

mamalove

I have never had that experience. BUT, your mom didn't really think that one out!! Geez Louise, did she think your wife, who was not a JW would agree with one iota of what your mom said? Is your mom older? Maybe she isn't as sharp as she once was.

tenyearsafter

Hi mamalove...yes, she is in her 80's, but she is still as sharp as a tack. She has become less tolerant as she has aged, but she hasn't lost any of her mental agility. It is puzzling that she would use this tactic...

wasblind

Hello there tenyearsout,

as a mom myself, I see that this religion teaches parents to have no natural

affection for their own children, animals protect and stick up for their children

better, ain't no way I as a mother would demean my child to no one. I as a mother

always tell my daughter, when everyone else turn away, I will be the last one standin'

in her corner,

The Bible speaks about havin' no natural affection, that describes the WTS

elderelite

Sadly ur mom is not a special case. Its all too common for dubbies to hold opposing points of view (accepting ur help but thinking ur a dead man at the big a)

But you dont sound overly harsh towards her and that earns u a lotta respect from me. Shes lived a long life and its hard to say how health or other factors are affecting her. Then too divorce and remarriage is hard on some, they view it as a personal failure in raising u type of thing, and she is probly deeply conflicted. She loves you as a son, wants to love you, but feels she shouldnt because you "betrayed jehovah".... In person she feels free to love you, when you are gone its full cult mode protection of her "integrity".... Im no pyscologist just observations from a fellow cult member... Its not personal. Shes just deeply entrenched

designs

Sorry to hear that. All of those years of training just kick in and its head down and full steam ahead.

I had a JW start to informal witness to me, stock door to door stuff, so I mentioned that my grandparents and mother were original Bible Students thinking that would make for an interesting conversation, No, he looked up once and immediately plowed ahead with his canned sermon.

wasblind

El ,

I just need to tell you publicly how much Ole Wuz luv you,

that's why I like speakin' with members still in, cause it

give a full grasp of the situation instead of a one sided view

tenyearsafter

Good points from all, thank you...I am used to personal attacks, but I guess it just threw me when she tried to get my wife to "see the light"! Just seemed like a weird way to try and win someone over...and EE, I wish I had an elder in my congregation like you...might have made things more tolerable! :)

Quandry

Since she doesn't have much contact with other people, I think she was "getting it all off her chest." She is probably frustrated because she's tried every means to get you back to the JWs, and it hasn't worked.She obviously buys into every utterance from the WT.

The really horrible thing is, you state that you were out picking up some things for her, and visit her every week. This means that she has a lack of appreciation for a caring son. I am so sorry. I wonder if you sent her a letter next week instead of visiting, letting her know how much her words hurt you and your wife, and just leaving it at that. She will have time to read and think, then resume with your visit the next week. See if this helps.

bnybyt

Hi TYA,

your mom is suffering from WT mind control which excuses the duplicity in her personality.

If you could get your wife to try and help your mom come to her senses then get a copy of "Captives of a Concept"

http://www.captivesofaconcept.com/NewOrderInformation.html

you can download it for $7

Follow the steps to get your wife start a Study with your mom,
your mom will be delighted, but use the suggestions in the book
and have your wife give a witness to your mom about the WT's
history by letting your mom be the teacher and your wife asking
the questions from the CoaC book.

If your wife is willing to do this, you may win your mom over.

Shalom.

Is this any way to get a convert??

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