Research Data Wanted: Married to a JW or child of one parent in and the other not

by Lady Lee 23 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  exwhyzee

  I am in category 2. My questions would include:

  What happens to a childs mental state when he/she hears a congregation of people gleefuly talking 3 times a week about Armegeddon only to be reminded that his/her non Witness father will be destroyed by God in the near future?

  What's it like to grow up with a very decent father in your home but be considered a "fatherless boy" by everyone in the Hall who thinks he is a gonner?

  What happens when your father listens to the JW's and dies from not taking a blood transfusion?

  What happens to a kid who has no relatives living in the same country and has no non Witness adults in his life to get a little perspective from ?

  What does it do to a kid when his non jW father is afraid his coworkers, neighbors and family will find out his wife and kids are JW's ?

  What is it like to grow up seeing your lively and pretty mom be excluded from "couples" outings because she is a threat to the other women or throws off the numbers if she comes alone?
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  JWdaughter

  Lady Lee, you can email me at jeand_nw at yahoo when you are ready. I don't get on here much, but I am happy to help. I was raised in a home with a JW mom and non-JW dad.
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  Midget-Sasquatch
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  shopaholic

  I'm in category 2 and will participate in the survey.
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  GoingGoingGone

  I'm in category 1.

  Also: My mother became a fanatic JW when I was about 6. My father was very opposed. Several years later, he was baptized a JW. Several years after that, he was DF'd.

  I believe that it's important for the "outside world" to understand how hard it is for children raised in a cult to leave, even when it seems that that option is available. The mind control sits deep, and is compounded by the threat of losing one's entire support system and one's family. If the young person does have the courage to turn their back on the JW religion and live their own life, they often carry with them the belief that they are a bad person because of it, and that the cult they grew up in is true. Shaking the belief that God is against you is only done by disproving the cult's teachings, which action is forbidden by the cult, (and which requires work, so this is an easy step to skip!)

  Anyway, I've got a lot of thoughts on this subject but being in category 1, this is not a good time for me to be online, but I'd like to help if I can... :)

  GGG
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  love2Bworldly

  Are you interested in me as a 13 year old baptised into the JW religion with my 17 year old sister and my parents were not JWs nor was anyone else in the family? Let me know. I don't post on here every day, only about once a week.

  When I was disfellowshipped at 21 years old, my non JW family members were extremely upset that my sister stopped speaking to me, as we had been very close and pretty much inseparable even sharing an apartment together for 2 years. My parents, especially my mom, had been devastated emotionally when we stopped celebrating Christmas & birthdays etc when I was 12 years old. And my aunt was very upset-- after I was disfellowshipped she used to chase the JWs down the street telling them they broke up families.

  Then recently, my 93 year old non JW father was dying and wanted the whole family together. Whenever my sister showed up he would start yelling at her about making up with me. It was very sad, as he just wanted his kids to get along and to know that as he was passing away. She wouldn't even speak to me at my dad's funeral last month, and when my fiance very nicely approached her and introduced himself-- She jerked her arm from him and said "So I gathered" and walked away. Very very sad, and my other siblings are sad about it too.
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  agent zero

  also a category 2. and exwhyzee's questions resonate with me.
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  TheListener

  1.b - with kids living at home.
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  Reopened Mind

  Lady Lee,

  Will you have a niche for someone like me who began studying with Witnesses as a teenager? My mother was very opposed. My father although he didn't like me studying ran some interference for me with my mother. The time period was in the late sixties when the "Armageddon is coming in 1975 hype" was at its peak. Just saying, the teen years are so vulnerable. I was baptised, married a JW, and raised two boys in the cult.

  Reopened Mind
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  TheKings

  i am category 2, but my situation is pretty unique.

  my mother is a JW but my father, recently deceased, never commited because he was mentally ill. my mother was forced to stay with a mentally ill person who caused our family nothing but pain because of the organization's policies on divorce. she had free reign to brainwash us because my father was not sane enough to do anything about it, much less care. my mother always felt shame because she could never get him dyed in the wool and tote him along to the kingdom hall with us regularly. it's all about appearances, after all.

  when i left, he was the only one who didn't hold it against me ... although, by then he believed JW's were right but he was too "sinful" and never good enough to ever be one. my mother made him feel like a worthless piece of crap his whole life because she was so bitter at never being allowed to leave him.