JW's - Hard to admit that much of life was a waste

by xelder 19 Replies latest jw experiences

  • leavingwt
    leavingwt

    But our false hopes and needs have nothing to do with reality. It was hard to accept that, but I did.

    This should be repeated, over and over. It's sobering.

  • LostGeneration
    LostGeneration

    I think one of the toughest things to do in life is ADMIT THAT YOU WERE WRONG.

    With a JW, it goes even further. If you leave, you not only admit that you wasted years or decades in a busywork, you may also be saying

    MY PARENTS ARE WRONG, MY FRIENDS ARE WRONG, MY RELATIVES ARE WRONG, MY LEADERS ARE WRONG.

    But saying "I WAS WRONG" is the first, and hardest step. Quite a few in this religion are so spooked by the prospect of being incorrect that they will support shunning of family and friends, lies about history, and will even sacrifice a loved ones life before even entertaining the thought that they may be WRONG!

  • WTWizard
    WTWizard

    This happens anytime you make a major investment. People invest in stocks, and then see them heading down. The companies are in big trouble, yet they cannot bring themselves to bail out. People invest in dollars and see them becoming diluted. If they bail out now, they will take a bath. But, if they don't, they will soon be hanging onto toilet papers instead of real wealth. A few manage to bail out into gold and silver, preserving what's left of their wealth. But those who are too proud to take a bath will see everything become toilet paper.

    The same thing happens when you have much invested in a bad religion. You invested sometimes most of your life in the hope of living forever in paradise. However, you are seeing signs of its sinking. You see "a generation" changing in definition. You see others bailing out, cutting their losses and getting into "gold and silver" (that is, worldly pursuits that are actually going to enrich what's left of your life). You see the desperation in the talks, urging you to hang on until the bitter end. And, too many people would rather hang on until the end--seeing their whole lives becoming "toilet paper", rather than taking their bath and bailing out.

    As for me, I didn't believe that everything would be for my best. I instead assumed it would be in Jehovah's best interests. Meaning that, rather than living in a temperate region, I would be placed in some disease-infested region of the tropics where nothing but poisonous insects and fruits ever grow. No living in temperate regions (either in America or Europe without the corruption, or in South America, South Africa, southern Australia, New Zealand, or other islands in the temperate regions of the north or south hemisphere). And I would be doing what Jehovah wants me to, not what I wanted. This would totally ruin the whole thing for me--what's the point in doing what you hate most of the time, in a place where you hate (desert or tropical wasteland, or for those who hate cold, the Arctic or Antarctic region)?

    Or, having to meet just other men? Seeing that the opposite sex would be gone (or have their lives ruined by my being there) is enough. I would rather take the bath, admit that I wasted the time, and at least try to invest what's left in "gold and silver" rather than waste everything, see all my time become "toilet paper", and then get that kind of non-satisfying existence.

  • Heaven
    Heaven

    Waiting on Jehovah gets you absolutely nowhere. For years my JW family members have been waiting to be saved from this wicked system of things. They grow old and die still waiting for a myth; a fantasy that is never going to materialize. They do useless work that accomplishes nothing. What a waste!

  • finallysomepride
  • Sour Grapes
    Sour Grapes

    My mother is in her late 80's and is bed ridden and

    is dying. She has sadness in her eyes. She never

    thought that she would get old and die. All she talked

    about 50 years ago is living thru the great tribulation and not

    getting old and having a lion for a pet.

    Now she can't walk and is in diapers.

    How sad.

    Sour Grapes

  • DesirousOfChange
    DesirousOfChange

    One passed up a better job to not miss meetings.

    (What a [email protected]$$)

    They are told that by still remaining faithful and never giving up on their (lost) hope, that even if they do not survive into the New World they will be resurrected and wake up into it, just like it happened tomorrow and as if they were only asleep for the night.

    DOC

  • man oh man
    man oh man

    "we weren't suppose to still be in this system of things" This is a quote that I keep hearing long time faithful ones make. It breaks my heart when I hear their dissapointment!

  • darth frosty
    darth frosty

    Naw its much more than that Its the whole conditioning process coupled with not wanting to say: A your life was wasted and the close B wasted on a cult!

    Sadly I have an example to back that up.

    Just found out a good friend of mine growing up is now going back to the hall?!?

    Some background is necesary. He was basically always shitted on by the elders he admitted this to me when we met up as adults. But he feels that it is the right religion and they have the 'truth' Like I said elders never paid any attention to him growing up, he never had any spiritual aspiration and he had one fugged up marriage to a JW broad.

    It is a powerful conditioning program that have that ensnares the mind to levels you just cant comprehend.

  • wobble
    wobble

    Yes, it is the "sunk cost" thinking of someone who has seen his investment in the stock market go down and down, he thinks "Well. if I just hang on, it is bound to come up again eventually"

    The old ones think deep down, "Well, I have nothing to lose by staying now", and that is true, they have quite a lot to lose by leaving.

    They will lose their life long "friends", their support system, their familiar place to go for worship, etc etc

    As the O.P says, it is also hard to admit that for the whole of your life you have been so, so, wrong.

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