JW's - Hard to admit that much of life was a waste

by xelder 19 Replies latest jw experiences

  • xelder

    From my observations, I think many (especially older) JW's hold through the stupid doctrinal changes because they can't admit the alternative.

    I had wished the JW kingdom hope was true, I needed it to be true. I'm 5th generation and my parents, grandparents, great grand.....ect needed it to be true. I have watched many "faithful" relatives hang on and die disappointed. But our false hopes and needs have nothing to do with reality. It was hard to accept that, but I did.

    I see my younger relatives in there 20's. Some barely attend anymore, some are pioneering with their little children. One passed up a better job to not miss meetings. >sigh<

    The GB, DO's, CO's all honor the traditions of the Organization because it is too scary to face the fact that much of their life was spent for nothing. Popularity (peer pressure) is a great motivator. The GB gets comfort from 7 million followers ..."see...lot's of others think we are right". But many of these high level leaders know better, or at least should suspect something wrong, be brave and invetigate and take action. But that would mean admitting that their heroes (CTRussel, JFR, Knorr, Freddie) were wrong. Who wants to give up on their heroes?

  • wha happened?
    wha happened?

    It reminds me alot of what happened to some of the military leaders in Russia after the wall fell. Or Japanese soldiers after WW2. Faced with a lifetime of error in their thinking, they killed themselves. I suppose the only defense is complete denial.

  • sir82

    This is also why things don't really change at Bethel, and why COs & DOs, who can see the ugly underside of the organization, don't leave.

    Imagine that you've been in "special full time service" for 20, 30, 40, or more years. You're now 60 years old but have no employment skills, no pension plan, no savings, heck not even any Social Security. Oh, and no kids.

    Your very survival in looming old age is utterly, completely, absolutely dependent on your staying loyal to the organization.

    In those circumstances, is it any wonder that they don't leave?

  • Mickey mouse
    Mickey mouse

    There was an excellent post by Besty about this: sunk costs.

  • wha happened?
    wha happened?

    yea I remember some time ago there was an employment scenario where u worked all your life for free, no retirement, no savings, and really no skills. Oh yea it was called slavery

  • alias

    Thanks for that link, Mickeymouse.

  • JustThatGirl007

    I think this is my mother's situation. Denial because she can't face reality. When my brother left (with quite a bang, I might add), she was devastated, of course, and just horrified. At one point in their discussions, I'm told that she said something to my brother along the lines of having doubts herself. Quite interesting. BUT, I think whenever she finally catches on to the fact that I'm not attending anymore and I'm done, she'll respond the same way. She'll have those doubts but she will never leave because the alternative scares the shit right out of her. FOR HER, she needs to believe that she'll see Armageddon, make it into paradise, and live forever in perfect harmony making friends with lions and riding an elephant around. :P

  • mrquik

    This goes along with the "zebra mentality" that the lion may get one or two but the rest of the herd will survive. My mother repeated that phrase "Armageddon is right around the corner" for 50 years. She died, as have millions of others, never realizing it was all a lie. Older witnesses will never leave. They'll die off as the rest of the herd waits for their reward of everlasting life.

  • outsmartthesystem

    I've noticed myself a subtle change that the GB is undoubtedly directing. While still telling the R & F that the end is right around the corner......they've wised up a bit. Now they make sure to tell the R & F that they don't know the day or hour. In fact, the overlapping generations explanation allows them to effectively say "it could be tomorrow.....but it could be 50 years from now....we don't know". ("but we would definitely lean closer to tomorrow than 50 years from now). I've heard in several talks now, stress being put on the whole "stay faithful to the organization" idea. I.E. - We are no longer guaranteeing the end within your lifetime.....but remain faithful and you'll be resurrected in a paradise earth.

    I truly believe they are very subtley getting more and more people to focus on the hope that they will be in the "new system" someday....instead of the hope that they will live through "the end" and then see the new system.

    When I was a kid, I dreamed of making it through the "end" which was a "promise" from God that had to occur before 1995. Once I made it...I could spend all eternity playing with lions. But 20 years from now, little kids will still be dreaming of playing with lions someday.....but also accepting of the fact that they will probably die in this old system.....only to be resurrected to paradise in the blink of an eye!

    So while still dangling the "any minute now' carrot.......they are also, in a subtle way, conditioning the rank and file to accept it and not be bummed out if the end never comes during their lifetimes.

  • sir82

    Among older and approaching-old-age JWs, I hear more resignation in their voices now.

    In my experience, I think most people aged 60+ are now expecting to die "in this system of things".

    And I've noticed a lot of "whistling in the graveyard" types - those who proclaim loud and long that "this system just CAN'T go on much longer". But there is a whiff of desperation to their voices when they say it. It's like they are reassuring themselves more than their listeners.

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