Oh, you are a born-in. You had it easy!

by TotallyADD 38 Replies latest jw friends

  • TotallyADD

    After reading Sabastious post on when did you lose your confidence. I started thinking about what it was like in the early 70's when large groups of people were coming into the WT cult because of the 1975 teaching. Talking with these people they whould tell me how hard it was for them to become a JW. The problems they had to overcome drugs, drinking, smoking and so forth. How they struggle to clean their lives up which was a good thing. Then they would ask me how I became a JW. I would tell them I was a born-in. Nine out of ten times they would smile at me and say Oh, you had it easy. I would just look at them and feel like I did not deserved being there. What they did not realize it the cult took my self esteem and confindence away long before I meant them. None of them had a clue what it was like being raised in this cult. The pressure, stress, neglect and abuse most born-ins went through. Now when I look back I think they were right about one thing. I did not deserved being in this cult. What they don't understand is. It is just as hard getting out of this cult as a born-in as well as all those converts who were duped by the WT cult. Did the same thing happen to any of you? Or what it just me? Totally ADD

  • blondie

    What about people born in but where dad was not a jw?

  • Pig

    I think people who convert do so because of some problem in their life or thinking. They need to fill a hole so to speak. Jw's take advantage of that weakness.

    Born in's also have a weakness. It is the fact that they are an innocent child with no say in the matter. They would have the potential to be normal functioning humans were it not for the fact they are guilted and shamed into living a life that conforms to a repressive cult.

    Having never experienced freedom to express themselves or persue their dreams they grow into a baby adult, unable to think for themselves. They dont know what they are missing out on, they are brainwashed to think that they are happy.

    To break free from the mind control fed to you from birth is a greater feat than to realised you joined a cult for the wrong reason. One has seen "the other side" whereas one has not

  • Pig

    I remember my non born in parents telling me their stories of when they were young, some of the trouble and adventures they got into.,

    What will I tell my children? I dressed up in a suit and went door to door, didnt have friends, got made fun of, had bible family studies......

  • sizemik

    TotallyADD . . .

    I think it's very easy for people to fail to understand different perspectives. You may recall I started a thread on the differences in the experiences of born-ins and converts some time back, and whether each really understood the other. What I got from that thread, is that basically, most of us don't. Probably because we haven't given it enough thought.

    I feel the JW experience is equally difficult for both . . . for different reasons. Even within each category, the degree of difficulties ecperienced vary greatly. I feel the response you recieved was simply ignorance . . . sadly.

    Blondies comment also shows that the simplicity of seeing it as one or the other isn't the result of a lot of depth of thought either . . . some were raised with one parent a JW . . . which brings it's own unique difficulties . . . others were introduced to the cult as children of various ages.

    It's difficult for most, if not everyone . . . nobody got it easy.

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep
    The problems they had to overcome drugs, drinking, smoking and so forth.

    They were problems??????

    They were my pleasures.

    Pleasures that were denied me as a born in cult member.

    What about people born in but where dad was not a jw?

    It only takes one cult member parent to do the damage.

  • punkofnice

    I was born in. Had no friends. Wasn't allowed out with 'worldly' friends from school. Had to give readings and talks. Had to study the watchtower with the family to answer up Sunday. Miss loads of good TV attending the meetings.

    Got depressed in my teens but didn't know why. Was afraid of Demons. Was afraid of the big 'A'. Was afraid of Jar Hoover.

    No self confidence. Relied on the litter-trash to answer my questions about life.

    I was in for over 50 years. Now I'm out I'm happy, I don't care about death.

    I feel bitter that a money grubbing cult stole my life. Was that my fault? Debatable? after all I followed my parents' lead. They were right, they couldn't be wrong they were my parents on that pedestal.

    The more we help to free people from the JW cancer the better. The more we prevent from joining the better.

    I don't consider myself an 'opponent' or 'apostate' in the JW sense. I am a freedom fighter! We all are!

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    The only 'good' thing about being raised as a cult member was that you didn't choose to be a total pratt.

    That choice was made for you by your parents.

    I don't have any friends from my youth as they were all going to be killed by Jehovah before we left school. You just don't go making friends with people who are going to be dead soon. That is just stupid.

    My best 'friends' are dead now. I just contacted a family member of one of my dead school mates and they have clammed up now that they know who I am. The 'sicko' tag remains, even when you were only on the planet as the result of a cult member's broken condom. You don't always get a chance to explain yourself.

  • Ding

    It's so sad when you see a little kid dressed up like an adult, forced to go door to door with the "good news" of the GB.

  • sizemik
    The 'sicko' tag remains, even when you were only on the planet as the result of a cult member's broken condom. You don't always get a chance to explain yourself.

    Yeah Chris . . . it's hard to live with . . . so is the embarrasment of having been a total pratt.

    Such are the differences . . . neither is easy.

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