Oh the weirdness: Observations from a study

by howdidtihappen 34 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • ABibleStudent
    howdidtihappen - Thanks everyone :) Sorry if my replies to the different things people said are hard to follow, i don't know how to properly do quotes on here.

    Hi howdidtihappen, I click on the "insert a new table", 1st icon on the 3rd row of the tool bar; select Cols 1, Rows 1, and Class "quote"; click on insert; copy/paste the information in the new table; and then resize the table to fit in a reply without the need for the horizontal scroll bar.

    It sounds like the KH that you went to wasn't very friendly. I have gone to a KH where I was loved bombed, but that still doesn't justify losing yourself to serve a throught-reforming, publishing, and distribution corporation. I agree with other posters - Run howdidtihappen, Run!!

    Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,


  • White Dove
    White Dove

    Most of those kids get beat weekly, at least.

    I did, although my mom says it was seldom.

    They get beat with belts and wooden spoons.

    Child abuse is alive and kicking in JW families, so is wife beating.

  • howdidtihappen

    Hi howdidtihappen, I click on the "insert a new table", 1st icon on the 3rd row of the tool bar; select Cols 1, Rows 1, and Class "quote"; click on insert; copy/paste the information in the new table; and then resize the table to fit in a reply without the need for the horizontal scroll bar.
    Aha, thank you! :) i failed because there's a scroll bar, but i've always sucked at tables ;)

    Wow, never even considered the kids stay quiet out of fear of a beating. I bet thats not the response my friend would have given, either. Speaking of responses my friend wont give, say I was to get baptized (NOT saying i am), my family aren't in, and i live with them. Would I have to move out? Would i start getting any pressure to separate myself from them?
  • the-illuminator81

    A rich brother can stumble other brothers in the congregation if he drives an expensive car.

    You will be told that your family is a tool Satan uses to persecute you. Once your family sees you behaving strangely because you are becoming a JW, they will tell you to stop. You will think "Wow, Satan really is using my family against me! I better spend less time with those worldly people." You might even think it's a prophecy being fulfilled.

  • skeeter1

    I confirm that many, but not all, children are beaten, threatened, and highly "manipulated" out of fear of beatings to remain quiet. Even babies are beaten/pinched/slapped to submission. The older women teach younger women that they are doing the young child a favor to make the child listen to Jehovah. Some kids are pretty smart, and learn to sit still as quiet at 2 or 3 years old. So, they are not beaten (as much). God bless the JW child with an attention disorder.

    As you "progress" in the brainwashing, you'll be manipulated more & more to confirm to the group's ways and to lose your individuality. The way to separate you from your family is to tell you that "bad associations spoil useful habits." Your family will likely question your new ways, and the JWs will jump on this as being a sign that they are aligned with Satan and trying to "drag you out of the Truth." You will be told that it's best to cool your relationship with them, unless they seem willing to start a Bible study. Therefore, to please both the JWs and your need to keep a beloved family, you will try to recruit your family into the JWs. They will likely resist more, which will affirm to you that your family is resisting the Truth and Jehovah God (who you are now programmed has the Truth). As you progress in the brainwashing, you will begin to view "normal" activities (activities that make us individuals) as bad or a waste of time - sports, higher education, political viewpoints, hobbies. Your family will still engage in these activities that you will deem as anti-Christian. You will become judgmental of your family. You will begin to see them more & more as bad associates. Your family will continue to have "family celebrations" such as Christmas, Mother's Day, Valentines, etc....which you will view as super Pagan. You will "decide" that you have nothing to do with your family, and chill your conversations with them about most everyday matters. I say "you" will decide...but it's really the Organization that has decided it.

    Yes, there are all sorts of unwritten rules on who can sit together. I knew a baptised JW who was engaged to a non-JW. The non-JW started to come to the KH. The two were reprimanded for sitting together. The elders wanted to not give the impression that they were dating (though we all knew) and that he was independently coming to the Truth.

    Further, teenaged boys and girls usually don't commiingle by sitting together or talking to each other in a single pair. Everything must be done in a large group.

    Further, dating is resigned to couples with a strong intention of getting married. The only way to date is if you are dead serious about finding a marraige mate. And, then, a proper JW date is chaparoned with the couple never being alone....especially not until they are engaged.

    Everyone must dress a certain way for every meeting.

    - Suits, jackets, ties, dress pants, socks... for all men and boys (especially older boys). No jeans, shorts. Men shouldn't have facial hair (but some European JWs do have beards & mustaches).

    - Dresses and pantyhose and nice shoes for all women and girls. Dresses must be to the knee (unless the woman is going to be looked at as loose). Bare legs are frowned upon, even in the heat of the summer. Remember those skort type skirts or billowy gaucho pants that look like a skirt - not allowed! Pants - never unless it's a congregation picnic. Comfortable shoes such as "old lady loafers" are not allowed unless you are a really old lady. I have a relative with a bone chip in a toe joint - and she painfully wears heels while in service or in the meetings.

    - Oh, and everything must be neatly pressed. I know one single man who wasn't allowed out in service becuase, although in a suit, he had a disheveled appearance.

    - Even when a JW attends a convention, they are to dress in "business casual attire" (i.e. no jeans, shorts, etc) whiel in the convention city (i.e. at dinner or in the hotel).

    Dress rules are super important. It shows how much you respect Jehovah, and treat the meetings as a special event. It also shows that you are a mature Christian and understand that you are representing Jehovah and His Organization and ready to witness to anyone at any moment. Spiffy people attract recruits and can sell more magazines. Like Amway, they are trying to sell the world something.

    Oh, the rules & rules & rules & rules & rules & rules & rules & rules & rules....one must follow for acceptance of the group. Break any one of these rules, and feel the wrath of the group's scorn. Elders watch the houses of suspected rule breakers! JW friends and family are programmed to rat on other followers. If you have any paranoid problems, get out.

    Each night, I still find myself going over & over the day's activities and scared I did something wrong. I feel that when I do make a "mistake" (even for something trivial like breaking a glass) that the wrath of someone is going to come down on me. Perhaps I was beaten too much as a child for fidgeting in the KH.


  • InterestedOne

    howdidithappen wrote:

    Would I have to move out? Would i start getting any pressure to separate myself from them?

    Notice the way the "Bible Teach" book is subtly prepping you to start building up a wall:

    As you learn more from the Bible, you may find that some well-meaning people will urge you to stop such studies. They may worry that you will change your beliefs. But do not let anyone stop you from forming the best friendship you can ever have. - What Does The Bible Really Teach, Chapter 1, Paragraph 22

  • The Quiet One
    The Quiet One

    Welcome to the forum, great observations you've made there. As to your question.. http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/69578/1/Articles-about-avoiding-relatives-and-worldly-people

  • dgp

    The Quiet One, thank you for the link.

  • Mad Sweeney
    Mad Sweeney

    Great thread.

    Another point about the suits is that the public reason is respectability but the cult reason is conformity. Same reason "brothers" in North America aren't allowed beards.

  • sd-7

    Hello there. You are indeed a perceptive one. Perhaps you should read my story, if you're even somewhat tempted by this JW girl. It can get unpleasant if you don't believe their teachings. Very unpleasant, indeed...

    But yeah, a lot of people do mill around in the back of the Kingdom Hall basically so they can talk. One or two might be attendants, but if it's more than that, they're not doing anything meaningful. I can remember that, at most, I might greet a Bible study, but sustained conversation wasn't really a strong suit for me, unless it was about non-spiritual matters. Or finding ways to answer elders' inquiries that are not overly incriminating...yes, Bro. Elder, I'm still looking at porn, okay? I even do it on my iPhone while the meeting is going on sometimes. Except I don't have an iPhone...

    Anyway, yeah, everybody here is saying it, and you can sense it. This is a dead-end road, pal. Best to turn around now, 'cause there's a steep drop at the end.


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