If you're reporting to somone who was three levels above you . . . then there's a good chance it's with his approval or endorsement, do you think? You're in demand it would appear . . . just give it your best . . . and build on the relationship with your superior . . . I think you're gonna do just fine.
The (modest) success I'm having in the world feels so weird
Thanks Sizemik! (and everyone else)
Everyone in life has a gift. It sounds like you are using that gift, and you are being rewarded for it. Don't feel guilty about using a gift.
I don't know if you still believe in God (or a higher power that created us)....but imagine how He would feel if he gave you a gift and you didn't use it or felt guilty about using it? Imagine if you were the Creator and gave someone good analytical skills, and these skills helped to make a company stronger (and employing many more people in the process)? Then, this person starts to use his gift, and he feels guilty about it. As the Creator, you'd be screaming, "Run Forrest, Run! Don't stop!"
You are going to make some money with your gift. Perhaps you could volunteer a day a month or give a little money to a charity as part of giving back? Becuase you make more money, you are in the position to empower others to acheive their gifts.
In the world of a JW, the only 'gift' was if you could be a pioneer, elder, microphone holder, toilet washer, or other slave title to the borg. Unless you were one of those, the borg made you guilty. It was a mind game to thwart your potential for the WTS pocketbook.
I think this is what my wife and I are feeling. We are about to start our donut business and there are days we feel we do not deserve to be successfull. The dollar numbers we are looking at per day seems large to us but when you start looking at it these are the dollar numbers you have to make to be successful. I know these are very realistic numbers and easy to achieve. But this XJW cult mind of ours sometimes pushes in all these thoughts of unworthiness. I try very hard not to be guilty for what we are doing. I also know we both have the skills and knowledge to make a success of it. The good thing we have going is we don't have to worry about meetings, fieldservice and what others in the congregation think of us. So fresh prince of ohio I know exactly how you feel. Totally ADD
I remember reading an article years ago about this subject. The author interviewed successful people, and guess what? They all feel like frauds and think sooner or later someone will find out that they aren't really that good. Except Martha Stewart and Donald Trump, maybe. Start appreciating yourself. You've worked hard, you provide a good service for your employers and they reward you for it.