What is your standing in a congregation if you're a man of 40 and never married? (page 5)

Nickolas

Freddie Franz made a personal vow but still took a glance at Asian women (short like him and supposedly submissive)

Fascinating. Can you cite sources, metatron?

White Dove

I'm with BP on the one about how sisters are to go about "choosing a mate."

We were told to look for spiritual qualifications, that if those were in line (complete with title) then they would make good husbands and fathers.

When I got divorced and raised my kids alone, no one would touch me.

I didn't even have friends because of the "DIVORCE" label.

Instant family...what's wrong with that?

I never understood that one.

No one tried to get to know me to find that I was a good mother and would have been a good spiritual wife.

Problem was that if I did get remarried to a good JW brother, I would have gotten sick of the headship arrangement strangling me and the kids.

I decided that it was also safer to not get involved with a man (never got the chance, but whatever) because I had a daughter.

I didn't want any man to be in her life while she was so young. I knew that men could be pervs with their steps.

justleft

White Dove....my experience is identical to yours. If I could hit a 'like' button on your post I would lol.

White Dove

Justleft,

I am so sorry. Life like that was so very lonely and painful.

I watched a pretty sister who had a baby with her first husband (cheated on her) get married to a brother from a different hall.

Seems that if there is a single mom who marries a brother, she only has one and it's a very cute baby/tot.

She also must be from a family that is well to do financially and has privs in the cong.

If she's alone without family there, she's not worth shit.

It's very hurtful and eye opening to find that your friends leave you because of your scarlet "D" and also the JW's as a whole don't care.

And, if you follow (like I tried) the dating advice, all it does is cause embarrassment for both people.

I looked around the khall and thought yuck, this is what I have to choose from?

Spiritual qualifications aside, their personalities were so guarded (didn't know this) that they appeared stiff and actually fearful of women. Very dry personalities.

YOU HAVE A PM!

Fadeout

My father, "Miz, you know the longer you hold off on getting married, the chances increase that you'll either end up alone or marry someone with significant baggage. Such as ready-made families(woman with kids), or disabilities whether mental or physical." Gee, thanks dad!

Ahaha, I just got that exact lecture from mom. With the bonus question, "are you gay?"

Dating was just never in my plans in the Borg, and since I've been out I've been focused on other things, like figuring out what I'm going to do with my life if the world isn't about to end.

I don't quite get how "not currently boning a female" = "must want to bone guys." People are weird.

Broken Promises

I don't quite get how "not currently boning a female" = "must want to bone guys." People are weird.

As has been discussed earlier, JW guys can be like kids in a candy shop when it comes to shopping for a JW female to marry. With such a range of desparate females at your disposal, then it would seem strange for a hetero male not to be taking advantage of the availability of females.

Reality79

Some "brothers" simply didn't want to get married and frankly I didn't blame them. I can't speak for where you guys are, but as for my own locality (North London to be exact), most of the women in the congregations here are either so rude/disrespectful, vain/shallow, have their heads up their arses, or have ridiculously unrealistic expectations or are just simply crazy as hell that the men simply keep to themselves because they just don't need the hassle. Trust me, if there is anyone here familiar with the congregations around here, you'll know what I'm talking about.

They complained about "brothers" not wanting them, yet I've known COUNTLESS guys who have been really good men get rejected and then made fun of mercilessly by these same "sisters" because the "brother" 1)didn't "look the part", 2)didn't have a title, 3)wasn't part of any clique, 4) didn't have a high paying job, 5)didn't come from a popular family etc. I knew one "brother" who was an elder and pioneer who got rejected by this "sister", because, and I quote: "he only looks ok, but I want someone whose really good looking and has a lot of money".

They behave like this, then seriously wonder why brothers who observe just say "f**k it" and don't give them the time of day. Also, a lot of the "sisters" got jealous of other women from other parts of the country who would visit London and always seemed to hook up with "their" "brothers". My wife who is from the midlands faced a lot of jealousy from some of these women. I wanted to get married, but "sisters" from around here were a no-no if I wanted to keep my sanity.

The "brothers" always seem to get the blame for "sisters" being single or going out into the "world" for a partner, but don't be fooled. A lot of women in there only bring it on themselves. Life is way too short to be dealing with some immature broad in her 30s who still acts like a 16 year old.

Witness My Fury

Spot on Reality79. I fell out of the social clique when i was about 28, I basically got fed up with it and being used. Once you are out of the main social circles it's game over unless you are either lucky or very persistent of which i was neither.

Pitchess Co-Gen

I notice that the brothers who are over 40 don't marry ( unless they find someone really good ). I mean the sisters that are older either has baggage ( abuse victims, have 2 to 3 kids, or just want to marry someone with a title or better yet "privileges ) . I mean the brothers get a lot of flack for not dating Jehovah Witness women, but I find that there just like the "worldly women " ( I hate using this term ), but I feel for JW's in genral because you have to date such a small pool of people and its a smaller world when your a Jehovah Witness. Check my past stories to find out what I went threw with dating Jehovah Witness girls.

garyneal

marked

What is your standing in a congregation if you're a man of 40 and never married?

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