Were you ever the subject of a ''Local needs'' talk???

by karter 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • karter

    Apperantly there was one in my old congro as my Neice (Baptized ,but inactive) is marring her livein boy freind.

    Anyone going to the weeding wil be publicly reproved.

  • Lunatic Faith
    Lunatic Faith

    Wow. I don't see how they can do that. Either somebody imagines they have too much power, or it's an empty threat. There is no biblical precedent for that and I would definitely challenge it.

    Yes, I have been the subject of a local needs talk more than once. When I was 19, my mother was in the hospital dying. I didn't want her to die alone so I lived in that hospital for a week--eating and sleeping and holding her hand. Some of my friends from the hall would come down so I wasn't alone all the time and we would play cards and visit in moms room. The doctors said it really benefitted her because even tho she was in a coma she could hear us in her room. One day, after only a little sleep for days on end, my brother and friend and I got into an ice fight in the cafeteria. Nobody but us were in there and we threw a little ice and then sobered up and went back to mom's room. Less than a week after Mom had died and we had the funeral there was a local needs about apropriate conduct in the hospital when visiting family. They even mentioned a group of young people having an ice fight and bringing reproach upon Jehovah. Everybody knew it was me and my family. I felt like they had publicly kicked us when we were down. I don't know why I didn't leave that [email protected]#*ing organization then.

    The other time, I was 21 and gotten heavily involved with a young brother in the hall. We were both publicly reproved. The week after our announcement they had a local needs that was so strong, everyone to this day assumes we had sex...which we didn't. Though now I wish we had so I wouldn't have wasted the next 20 years in that religion.

  • blondie

    I understand that they never name any individuals, merely discuss the behavior or actions and how the congregation should view it. The audience (if they know the gossip) put 2 and 2 together.

    The subject I have seen most discussed is marrying "out of da truth." It is also called a "marking" talk.

  • undercover
    I don't see how they can do that.

    They probably didn't. Look closer at the post...

    Apperantly there was one... ...Anyone going to the weeding wil be publicly reproved.

    Apparently the OP did not witness this talk first hand and is hearing it second or third hand. Knowing how JWs gossip it would not be past the realm of probablity that a fairly strict talk on attending the wedding was given, even mentioning that anyone attending could be viewed as someone who condones the sins of the marrying party. Read a few choice scriptures about how such sinners are viewed and voila! by extension anyone in their presence is guilty by association. By the time a dub or two repeat the story, it has now been stated that the speaker said that anyone attending would be reproved.

    Pioneers, MSs and elders do face the risk of being removed for attending the wedding/funeral of certain ostracized members/ex-members of the congregation. Maybe someone misconstrued that threat into "anyone attending will be reproved".

  • LongHairGal

    Hi Karter,

    I seem to remember being the subject of one many years ago but wasn't paying attention because I was young and just didn't care.

    I am sorry you are seeing their pettiness with regard to this wedding. For Christ's sake, can't these people even be happy that a young couple is getting married and at least wish them well? No, they have to act like disgruntled picketers or something. Boy, I surely got tired of all this nonsense and judgmentalism and am glad to be out of it.

  • Girlie

    I was the subject of one some years ago because of a violation issue that I was publicly reproved for. It was on the need to report a wrong doing if you know of it and not to keep it a secret because of a friendship BS, etc. Didn't think much of it then or now. I also have seen that a married elder in my former congregation (last I heard, he was DF'd for adultery) used the local needs talk to discuss the going ons in his home and to put his wife on the spot.

  • blondie

    I do know and have seen MS, elders, and regular pioneers lose their "privileges" if they attend such a wedding. Public reproval means the person could have been df'd if they had not been "repentant." Attending such a wedding is not a df'ing offense.

  • JRK


    It is a tradition in my area, that whenever anyone gets reproved, the next special needs part is a blow-by-blow of your experience.


  • JW GoneBad
    JW GoneBad

    JRK: .........'the next special needs part is a blow-by-blow of your experience.' I like your choice of words.

    Local needs talks of this nature are just another form of public humiliation by the 'loving' Elder arrangement. Too many times it is not only the individual or individuals involved but also family members that have to sit through the embarrassment of it all. As 'Blondie' says many in the congregation are able to put 2 and 2 together.

    Usually the Elder giving the talk gets a big 'rush' out of the whole thing. After meeting he gets a 'high-five' by the rest of the body.

    They may have nipped something in the bud (or Not) by the talk, but only at the R & F's expense.

  • Honesty


    It was all about 'waiting on Jehovah' instead of running ahead of the organisation.




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