by minimus 31 Replies latest jw friends
I've become adept at being alone.
It is unburdening.
Not being compelled to call or receive calls or "touch base."
Life is all electives.
I don't have to be careful what I say or how I say it.
I can find comfort in silence. Create my own day.
Dependency is a weakening agent. One loses "self."
Being swallowed up in the "other" is non-existence.
Some years ago I read that some French people (yep, them again) actually married but lived in separate homes, because of the reasons Terry is mentioning. They felt that the petty things of married life, such as leaving the toilet seat up, did a lot of damage to marriages, so they chose to live separately.
Dana Bug, you have a PM.
I love being married! was married at !6.. That lasted 10 yrs....single all through the 80s...crazy and wild decade!!!!!lol Married again in 89....I do much better married......I've been faithful to him always.....22 yrs...But we almost live seperate lives..He works alot...comes home ,pours a glass of wine and watches FOX news!!! Love him dearly, but its not what I imagined....it is what it is .I have everything materialy...So I make my own life,friends, travel ,partys..shopping, lunch..and great sex....so it's working for me.....nothings perfect! half married.....half single.....Sherry
Is being in a relationship important to me? No, not in of itself. Otherwise, it would be a wonder how I've remained completely single and unattached all of my adult life.
Do I get lonely? Yes. The only thing that keeps me sane in this regard is constantly reminding myself that as bad as loneliness is, being in a bad relationship is even worse. All I have to do is look around at other people I've known to see the wreck and ruin being in a lousy partnership can cause.
What IS important to me is to find the right kind of partner to be with long term. I don't believe in "soulmates" or "destiny" or "the one". COMPATIBILITY is paramount. I want to be with someone who can actually be a partner in life, someone I can truly call my best friend, someone I could truly trust my life with. I'm not looking for perfection but I'm not just going to settle for sharing a bed with just anyone.
Also important is TIMING. Two people could be the most perfect match, but it would be for nought if the timing is completely wrong.
V665
P.S. I've gotta give props to minimus for once. He makes good, thought provoking threads when he isn't being an attention whore...
Vampire, you're worse than me!
Considering the absolute misery that can come with a relationship, it hasn't mattered to me to be in one. Of course, that didn't stop me from getting married a couple of months ago. I guess it really comes down to how the partners interact. A great relationship is very satifying. A bad one can be a slow cruise to hell.
Nope. I would rather being single than to be in a crappy relationship. I am opened to the idea, but not actively pursuing it or press to rush into one.
all very interesting comments!
Yes it is...but only now that I have the right partner.
Loz x
Very important to me. Been married to the same gal for almost 37 years. We have had our highs and are lows. To me it would be very lonely without her. I don't know how I ended up with such a great person but I did and I am eternally grateful. Totally ADD
