How do I get them to leave me alone?

by Mr. Falcon 13 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • miseryloveselders
    miseryloveselders

    Why does every ex-elder who went through so much turmoil while being an elder always whine to me about how much it sucked, yet when I mention that I don't want to be one, they suddenly get all nostalgic and tell me what a blessing it is to serve as an E-man?

    This reminds me of almost every dude I've ever known who has been in the military, including my father. The far majority of them had absolutely nothing positive to say about their experiences in uniform. Yet the ironic part is, the far majority of those same folks will encourage someone else to join the arm services. They'll use every persuasive argument from it being an honor, to it being your duty, to it making a man out of you. Meanwhile 5 minutes before praising the armed forces, they were badmouthing their entire time spent there and everybody else in their units. For them to encourage someone to join, it's almost like they find it unfair that there's people out there who haven't felt their pain.

    As far as being an elder is concerned, I've jokingly argued with my dad, telling him that he suckered me into this appointed bull crap. I should have known better too, considering all the years as a child our house would be on pens and needles when dad was on his way home from an elder's meeting. We were always worried about him being in a bad mood, and irritable. He wasn't physically abusive or anything, but borderline verbally abusive, and more prone to say regretful things after an elder's meeting. Why I followed in his footsteps and didn't rebel like other youths of my generation, I'll never know. Probably fear......

    As far as being nostalgic, and viewing it as a blessing, in my opinion being an elder is about as much of a blessing as being diagnosed with cancerous hemoroids.

  • Mr. Falcon
    Mr. Falcon

    Flipper - Thanks for pointing out that important aspect. Family. My family comes first and will always. In the past I have gone above and beyond to be a "yes man" (before I came to my senses) and this was done at the expense of my family.

    It's ridiculous how they yak on about how family is a priority, blah blah, but most of these cats will abandon their wives and kids to go rush off to help some other JW family/assignment at the drop of a hat. I'd prefer to concentrate on spending time with my kids, so maybe, JUST MAYBE, they can have some semblance of a "normal" life.

    Misery - my old man gives me grief about my current attitude towards serving, yet when I ask him if he'll serve again, he's like "NO WAY!" ummmm.... am I missing something?

  • confuzzled777
    confuzzled777

    I am SO glad that my hubby has never been an MS or an Elder! My x-SIL HATED it when her hubby was an MS. She had 2 small kids and was left alone with them at meetings AND especially at the assemblies. She finally asked him if he would step down so he could help her out.

    I agree the Family aspect! Be there for your kids and your wife! As you said......Concentrate on spending time with your kids........They will only be with you for a short time, and you will never hear them say they wished you had been an elder and spent LESS time with them! THEY need you NOW!

    My kids are 13 and almost 17. They NEED their dad to be here for THEM, not off counting contributions or dealing with other people's family issues.

    I am proud of you in that you recognize the more important things in life.

  • Reality79
    Reality79

    Well, Yippee Kai Yai Mr Falcon!!! LOL!

    You guys were lucky enough to even be asked because when it came to considering me for any form of appointment apart from the usual "priveleges" I had, the elderz never even looked at me twice.

    A lot of guys are eager to get appointed because it increases their popularity and their chances of getting with "sisters".

    I find it interesting reading from a lot of ex elders on this site and realising the true misery behind the scenes. I never expected to be an elder at my age but in hindsight it was obviously a blessing they never considered me to become an ms.

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