by Hairyhegoat 50 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse
I never got a single swat when I was spanked. Oh no, I was hit multiple times- my parents used their hand, belt, wooden spoon, even a 2x4 once. Who the hell spanks their kid with a wooden plank? My jw father, that's who.
My dad had a bad temper to begin with and when he became a witness, they pretty much gave him a license to really act on his temper.
How many people got spanked for hitting their brother or sister? How did our parents not see the hypocrisy in that?
Doubtfully:
And if the parents are smart about it, they don't even need to give said swat in the tush, they figure out a way to keep the child paying attention some other way.
I used to be judgmental, like you.
My son would sit happily at the meetings with a pile of books, paper and crayons. I would see other parents struggling with their children and think, "Why don't they just spank that kid?"
Then my daughter was born. It didn't matter what we did, that child could not sit still. Even at home, she couldn't sit still for a even a kid's movie.
I learned a lesson about judging other parents as "smart" or not. Hopefully, you will, too.
What's more important... learning to sit still for two hours, or learning to love God and His Son? - Tammy
I'm sorry but neither. Indoctrinating children is wrong - Me
May I ask what you teach your children? - Tammy
To make thoughtful ethical choices.
To care about others, that fairness and justice matters.
That doing good things for others is a virtue becasue that's the sort of society that produces the greatest amount of good.
To question everything and to insist on evidence for anything that they are asked to believe.
That this life is thte only one they are ever going to get so make the most of it.
To please choose my nursing home with care :)
Hey doubtfully, a lot of folks here have called you out. Care to share your valuable insights via some response - or were you taught to only respond to the infliction of physical pain?
Cofty, I teach the same things with a few additions:
To make thoughtful ethical choices.
Check.
To care about others, that fairness and justice matters.
Check. But that mercy and forgiveness matter just as much, even when you are the one who has been wronged. (that might qualify under your ethical heading though)
That doing good things for others is a virtue becasue that's the sort of society that produces the greatest amount of good.
Check... but I add to this : that we also do good and show kindness to others because Jesus asks us to, and because He did and does the same for us - even to people who were doing wrong to him. I do explain the natural benefits of doing good... but I try to put emphasis on forgiving and showing mercy (which I hope I explain well enough, because mercy to a kid doesn't always mean anything more than just a word) Even showing these things when your good deed is not rewarded with another good deed. (because we don't know what might have happened to make that person the way they are - or they could be hurting in their lives over something else, and we don't know why - this is not an easy thing to teach any kid - faith in Christ or not - but I hope that as they get older, some of this will make them pause and think)
To question everything and to insist on evidence for anything that they are asked to believe.
I don't know that I have tell them to question everything - they just naturally do that - but I do tell them not to believe something just because someone or something tells them so. They should research it themselves, though for a young child, that research might extend just as far as a parent. There is nothing wrong with that either, since as they get older, they can be encouraged to check things out more deeply.
That this life is thte only one they are ever going to get so make the most of it.
Well, I don't tell my children that - but they might be too young to begin emphasizing the one physical life and adding pressure to them (because my boys are both sensitive to pressure, and I want them to have fun without the stress of thinking this mistake or that one is the end of their lives) I have taught them about being with Jesus and God and their loved ones after they die.
To please choose my nursing home with care :)
That one hasn't come up yet for me :)
Do you still believe that I am (or people like me are) abusing my children by teaching them to believe in God and Christ?
Tammy
Doubtfully Yours said: A good swat in the butt for misbehaving is NOT child abuse; such form of discipline never killed anyone. It teaches respect, discipline and self-control.
How about a great big slap on your stupid face just because....well, you're an idiot? Would you consider that abuse?
2 meetings each week of 1:45 mins long, give me a break, children in time learn to behave and pay attention.
In case you're too stupid to realize it, to a 3 year old child, 2 hours of sitting straight in a chair when you do not understand anything that's being said, would be like you or me having to sit perfectly still for 6 or 7 hours listening to someone preaching in a foreign language. How long do you think you'd be able to sit there before you started figgeting DY? Should you then be dragged to the bathroom for some whacking on your bare ass with a belt because you were growing bored?
Do you ever think before you write? Oh I forgot----you left your brain at the doorstep to the Kingdumb Hall.
I do admit spanking both of my children for misbehaving at meetings. But I never beat them. And later when my daughter was little I was already at the point of such shear boredom that I'd look forward to her getting restless so that we could get up and go to the bathroom. We'd just stand around and wish we were home or at McDonalds!
Aw yes Crapola...the "We'll go to McD's after the meeting if you are good.." bribe. Usually worked for my kids..
Snoozy
TEC said:
Do you still believe that I am (or people like me are) abusing my children by teaching them to believe in God and Christ?
Not that I can answer for cofty, but my response is: no more abusive than teaching children to believe in Santa Claus. But hey - even if you keep telling them mythical figures are real, all into their young adult life, hopefully such ideas will not retard their educational foundation. But hey, some adults still believe in Santa - so who knows:
Do you still believe that I am (or people like me are) abusing my children by teaching them to believe in God and Christ? - Tammy
No I wouldn't say that, the word "abusing" is far too emotive in this context and implies a parent is deliberately doing harm to their children.
I do believe that chrisitanity is psychologically harmful. How harmful depends on whether the parent subscribes to xianity-lite or the full blown "you are a sinner, love god or burn in hell" version.
If a child is raised to trust the bible in matters of morality, or to view it as a reliable guide to history or questions of science then that is to do a child a great disservice. If a child is raised to believe that they are inherently "sinful" or that they are in any danger of eternal post-death punishment then that is appalling. I have personally seen the effects of that kind of thinking on children I knew at church.
