I'm racking my brain here.

by MrFreeze 13 Replies latest jw experiences

  • MrFreeze
    MrFreeze

    If you've read some of my previous topics you can kind of get an idea of where I am right now.

    I'm still living at home. I just turned 22 years old. A couple months ago I confessed my true feelings and beliefs to the elders. The elders have been stopping by non-stop to "encourage" me. So here's the first thing I'm wondering. Why have they not mentioned anything about having a judicial committee meeting yet? How soon do you think I can expect it? They know I've been on apostate websites and have told them apostate views on the organization. How much longer until they try to disfellowship me?

    Here's another thing I'm wondering about. I had been talking to my mom and stepdad about moving out. They are kicking my sister and her husband out of the other house they own because they aren't paying rent and are willing to let me live there for very cheap until my brother and his girlfriend get married in summer and then they would move in along with me. They told me I could do this as soon as my sister and her husband move out. They know the whole situation of my "independent" thinking. They know I'm probably going to get disfellowshipped. Why are they letting me move into that house? A couple theories I have are maybe my mom wants to have an excuse to be able to talk to me after the disfellowshipping. Another thing I thought of is maybe the elders, since my stepdad is an MS, are trying to get them to push me out of the house and my mom and stepdad don't want to just kick me out.

    I'm very confused by the whole situation. Maybe somebody here could shed some light on both of my questions.

  • mamalove
    mamalove

    Maybe the elders have some glimmer of hope for you? Maybe they are softies and don't want to wreck your life while you are having doubts, etc. Don't want you to be more bitter?

    As for your mom and dad, it seems weird to me. Are they strong JW's, or more liberal? Maybe just ask your mom. Or is it the elephant in the room?

  • MrFreeze
    MrFreeze

    As for these elders, maybe it is the case they still have hope for me. I don't know why that would be. I told them I wasn't changing my mind. Is it possible that they won't ever disfellowship me, despite my apostate views?

    They are strong JW's and it's sort of an elephant in the room. My mom has done shunning of a friend before, so I know she isn't opposed to it. When I told her my views she said "You know what the end result of this will be? I don't want to lose you." She has said some other things that lets me know she would take the disfellowshipping seriously.

  • MrFreeze
    MrFreeze

    Does anybody have any idea? Will they even bother disfellowshipping me or will they just let me go eventually? I'm really anxious to know. Is there any new information about this in the elder's manual?

  • transhuman68
    transhuman68

    Have you got blonde hair and blue eyes? You could be the congo pet, and the elders don't want to boot you out unless they have to.

  • MrFreeze
    MrFreeze

    Damn, I do have blonde hair and blue eyes. I know I did a lot in the congregation. MS/Pioneer. I just figured with telling them my views and telling them I wouldn't change my opinion, that for certain they would disfellowship me for apostasy.

    I'm just wondering if maybe they are waiting on the yokels in New York to tell them what to do or if they are just going to leave it be. It's just very surprising to me that they wouldn't disfellowship me if they know they aren't getting me back and that I believe false things. Also, I've been trying to help others out of the organization. They don't know about that though, I'm sure of it.

  • flipper
    flipper

    MRFREEZE- I think your conclusions are probably correct. Your mom & dad still want to associate with you NO MATTER what happens to you DF or not. Your parents love you authentically and probably won't let the JW cult or elders tell them they can't associate with you. So I would trust your instincts and not worry too much about the elders . They only have as much power as we give them. Be courageous and strong. Your parents love is stronger than cult love . Hang in there

  • Sapere Aude
    Sapere Aude

    In response to " I'm racking my brain" - I'm new to this so bare with me - there isn't any reason you should be disfellowshiped because of what you now believe. The way they should handle this situation is that they should be patient with you and attempt to help readjust your thinking. The only time they should take judicial action is if you start teaching your ideas to others. When I say teaching -- it could be just discussing it with someone in a pasionate manner. Basiclly what I'm saying is you can believe what ever you want just don't tell anyone - crazy isn't it but that's how it is. If you want to voice your concerns do so in question form only. There is more that I could say but I'lll leave it for another time. Hang in there..............................

  • MrFreeze
    MrFreeze

    For various reasons, I actually might prefer it if they did disfellowship me. This way it's on me, not them. If they don't, I may eventually send a disassociation letter. I don't want to have anything to do with this religion anymore. Of course, I could always just ask an elder next time they stop by, which I'm sure they will soon enough.

  • Former
    Former

    The elders are advised to show extraordinary consideration to one experiencing doubts. So long as you are willing to play nicely in the sandbox, they will not disfellowship you whatever your beliefs are.

    Disassociating brings no advantage.

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