Father Severely Abused Me

by Band on the Run 37 Replies latest watchtower child-abuse

  • Band on the Run
    Band on the Run

    My father severely abused me. Several times I fought for my very life. I was the eldest and the scapegoat. My family had extensive contacts with JW since Russell's days. My father served at Bethel as a bodyguard to Judge Rutherford and Nathan Knorr. He never did what he was supposed to do Witness wise yet he would not disassociate. We had all the negatives and none of the very few positive. It was extraordinarily painful to me b/c both sides of my family were active. He was irrational. There was no way to avoid a beating. He had an ancient Roman view of his authority. Whatever he did was sanctified. I was such a good child. In fact, I was overly eager to please. He beat my brother with cerebral palsy with no mercy. My mom struggled to not be murdered. I won't repeat all the details here.

    I prayed so hard to Jehovah for my father to be an active Witness because my aunt and uncle were kind people active in the WTS. My conviction was that if he did what he should do, he would be loving. He was a redneck buffoon, too. One night when I was twelve, he beat my brother and sister, too, in a very frightful manner. I wrote to a teen fashion mag for advice. Rather than print my letter, they responded that I should get in touch with a social welfare agency. Despite repeated attempts, I gave up b/c of the Ten Commandments Respect your Parents one. Lightning would strike me. I crumpled up the letter and hid it. My mother, the spy, found it and sought help. Their first instinct was to meet with the minister in charge of the congregation. My mother was adamant that it would make the abuse far worse. The agency was shocked. Never before had they encountered such a religion. To this day, I have no doubt we would have been implored to worship his authority. The JW theology and its unique culture fed his abuse. I am not stating that the WTS beat me. Rather, that a deliberate atmosphere existed where his actions and beliefs flourished. Witness theology gave him justification.

    As my mother predicted, the day he did became active, the beatings increased 500%. I could not believe that I prayed for this situation. He tried to throw me down stairs with a full body cast on me. He was dying of heart disease. Trapping me in the bathroom when we were alone, he proclaimed that I was killing him, murdering him so I would watch him die. He gasped for breath. I tried to budge his body away from the door but he was way stronger than me in the midst of his affliction. I screached for help and an ambulance with every fiber of my being. The police arrived. He ran downstairs and popped up a pill. When the police said to stay away from each other, I told them he could not stay away from me. When the agency heard this story, they went ballistic. A rape watch was instituted. Efforts were made to have far away family take me for safety. I snapped completely. Ever Dudley Doright, I accepted the beatings. Now I fought back with all my might. He had no legitimacy. I asked for guns and/or knives from school acquaintances. My brother did, too. Finally, he announced that I was so despicable I could not stay in school. The overseer had pulled his thirteen year old from school. I was determined to attend college. He wanted to watch me bag groceries at a local grocery store. I spoke to the principal to prepare for a major court battle. The sad part was I knew the principal and a judge would never let a star student bag groceries against their will. My family was the issue. Why did I have to go in exile and never see my mother and siblings. He died before it came to resolution.

    I am active in Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families. This is the price paid for undue deference to authority. Once he died, we had a wonderful family. I refused to attend one more meeting. My family followed my lead. It was shocking to me how quickly the Witness stuff crumbled. Not all Witnesses are like this. My perception was that the Watchtower never really counselled families during this period. Clearly, he knew numerous responsible people at Bethel. My mother would have turned to them if it were feasible. Once we attended an assembly in Nova Scotia. My little sister was an adorable two year old! She swung her little legs in front of her, slightly brushing the chair in front of her. A Bethelite was sitting next to us, making out with his girlfriend. He removed his belt and handed it to my mother to beat my sister! Maybe abuse is not endorse in the WT text or from the platform. The culture endorses it.

    Unlike good Witnesses, I know my New Testament from years of reading entire books and comparing books in one sitting. Can anyone imagine Jesus picking up a strap to beat a two year old? The Witnesses I run into at my door and the train station are good, decent people who are brainwashed. It is so sad. Unlike other people I know, I can't talk to them about content. I try to be introspective about my hatred of WTS and its true role in my abuse. They get the benefit of my doubt. The WTS reputations seems to be squeaky clean, devoted worshippers or crazed, brainwash victims. There seems to be no stereotype in the middle.

  • sleepingbeauty

    Maybe abuse is not endorse in the WT text or from the platform. The culture endorses it.

    You hit the nail on the head... WT culture endorses all manner of things, it may not come from the platform, but somehow there is a unity on how children should be trained and how families should behave (like victorians in that children should be seen & not heard) ... This is the bit that those of the World just dont understand. They simply keep believing that JW's are clean upright people who are so lovely, and wouldnt behave like they do... Little do they know...

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee


    First welcome to the forum

    Now I'm sorry for what you went through. Sadly there are too many stories like youes - far too many. In my famtily my mother became the Witness. As a single parents her rage knew no bounds. She beat all of us. I totally agree that the WTS culture encourages the physical abuse of children. They proudly proclaim that God gives them the right to "Beat their children with the rod of discipline" And you can bet my mother took that scripture to heart.

  • Think About It
    Think About It

    BandotRun......you have a PM. (click the letter symbol in upper RH corner)

  • life is to short
    life is to short

    It is totally endorsed in unspoken ways. I will never forget just last year the CO was sitting in my living room saying how he liked it when parents spanked a two year old for not sitting still at the meetings well. Sick


  • thetrueone

    - As my mother predicted, the day he did became active, the beatings increased 500%. I could not believe that I prayed for this situation.

    - He tried to throw me down stairs with a full body cast on me.

    - A Bethelite was sitting next to us, making out with his girlfriend. He removed his belt and handed it to my mother to beat my sister!

    Sorry Band on the Run , your story telling sounds overly embellished and not not truthful to the facts.

    Anyone who has been involved with JW organization for any length of time can realize that.

    Yes of course there have been JWS that abused their children with brutality I myself was a victim of abuse at the hand of father.

    That being said, I think people are intelligent enough to know when stories are being relatively stretched to make a discerning point.

  • Violia

    I recall being at a circuit assembly and hearing a CO say that when he was a child his mother would take a hot iron and put it on his back for punishment. There were loud gasps from everyone . His voice trembled for a moment and then he said that something like it had benefited him. He had learned from it.

    I will never forget the gasps and how I felt for that man. This may have been the first time he allowed himself to say that. I just wanted to run to the stage and comfort him.

    There are some sad stories out there.

  • Violia

    What I got from the story is her father was severly mentally ill and they got no help from the cong. That is not so farfetched. She is saying they were jws, but sounds like they were on the outs with everyone but still attended. That puts them in the unique position of not having friends and help from the org, and not having connections on the outside.

    There are a number of folks that end up like this. They try and hang in with the jws, but due to something they may have done ( in this case sounds like the father was the problem) they are never really accepted by jws - but they hang on anyway.

  • life is to short
    life is to short

    I am with Violia the family I grew up in was beyond unbelievable. I myself have problems believing what I remember happened. There is a story about a drug dealer that I swear I made up, it was too strange to believe and I swear that somehow I made it up in my mind, maybe from watching TV or something. It was not until last year that I was talking with my worldly aunt and told her what I remembered. I added I had to have made it up my parents were not into drugs so where did I get his from. My aunt told me no LITS it is true it did happen. I was just blown away. No one outside my family would believe it.

    I had an elder tell me that I was lying last year when I said somethings my dad did at work, he had worked with my dad and he said NO LITS it never happened. IT NEVER HAPPENED! You are making this up. I know for a fact this did happen with out a doubt, I had at the time worldly people who saw my dad do the things that happened. Yet this elder told me I was lying. He kept asking me how I knew. I was like I lived with my parents and worldly people saw it my dad almost lost his job over it. This elder still said nope it did not happen. Yet years earlier this elder did say my dad did things that almost caused his job.

    It is all so crazy making. The part about the Bethelite and making out, have you worked at Bethel, things go on there you would be shocked at. I know part of her story sounds different but it does not mean it was not true or how she lived through it or what it is in her mind.

    I am just saying that it is hard to grow up with abuse, and yes you do not remember everything totally the way it happened but it does not mean you are lying.


  • thetrueone

    It has to be acknowledged that devout JWS will white wash a persons character, if only to make the organization they belong to appear

    clean upright and righteous, this is how they have been programed to do. You can aspect that but sometimes arriving at an accurate

    truth to what is and what happen can get played out on particular events, by people who left this religion, is a knowingly fact.

    One thing that caught my attention to this story is when it was stated that this guy was a personal body guard for the top brass like

    Rutherford and Knorr.

    Any JW would know you don't get that kind of privilege unless that individual was outward knowingly in very good standing by those higher ups.

    In an attempt to throw as much dirt on to this organization as possible, people have come to this site with improbable embellished bullshit stories,

    thats just a fact, take it or leave it.

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