Why do I come here

by Luo bou to 12 Replies latest jw friends

  • Luo bou to
    Luo bou to

    I believe I have completely freed myself from any Borg influence yet I am drawn to this board. Like many of you ,I lost my wife and family, but I don't believe I can do anything about that, and if I could, I doubt that it would be a kindness on my part to do so. They have so much invested. I know from my own experience; raised from childhood, baptized at 17, and then faced with the awful realization at 48 that it was all bullshit and I had wasted my life a terrible emptiness and a whole gambit of emotions I had to deal with. It was no picnic . I believe I am alright now at 62 and reasonably sane. At least I think I am. In fact I know I am. I've got my doubts about you though So why do I come here? I am not a crusader although I have helped many ex's. I don't have any lingering doubts about whether it could be true. So why I ask myself what is the fascination ( rhetorical question). I think its because, although I have never met any of you, I can relate to, and understand you .There is a certain report a bond that only we share that those that have not experienced it. do not really understand. Your the only connection I have with a major part of my life. I know I could party with you guys and have a great time So here I am

  • cameo-d
    cameo-d

    Luo bou to: " I think its because, although I have never met any of you, I can relate to, and understand you ."

    Yes, people who have had the yoke of WT upon them have a bond of understanding. And it's good to have one another to talk to when the nightmares creep back in or the WT influences sometimes rears its ugly head again in some way.

    Friends are like buoys in a churning sea. No one needs the weight of an anchor, but a buoy to cling to and rest for awhile is nice.

    One of my interests here is pursuing topics and questions that have not been sufficiently answered by man's religions. I figure that many JWs were sincere in wanting to seek the truth before they got seduced into WT promises that they had special knowledge. And if they were sincere in wanting to know truth, that many would still be diligent in seeking it....once they can get past the lies.

  • bigmac
    bigmac

    @lou bou to

    it seems we are in the same boat: same age, same history ( although i escaped finally 30 years ago )

    why do i come here? i only discovered internet exjw sites earlier this year, before that, never knew they existed

    hadn't really thought about my past life for years--moved on.

    i suppose i'm here because its sharing experiences & thoughts with like minded others--before this there was no-one.

    also its because no one likes me, ive got no mates & it annoys my wife.

  • cantleave
    cantleave

    Shared experience is important because very few who haven't been in can truly relate.

    I've got a feeling cameo'd is an exception, seems to know a lot and understand most things but never been in - what is your interest / story that drives you here cameo'd (I am NOT being facetious I really want to know without going through 6755 post).

  • wobble
    wobble

    I have been addicted to this site since I discovered it.

    I found support and love and solid advice here when I felt very alone, born in, all my family in (except my two perceptive sons, they smelt the BS and left years ago, neither was baptised) I started the lonely journey away from the Cult at age 58.

    I found too that all the questions I had could be answered by using the search facility and reading old threads, it was an education to see the site itself mature into what it is today.

    I come here now mainly to help others see the lies and underhand methods of the WT, and for a good laugh ! there are so many really funny people on here that it is always good for the soul.

    The great learning of people like Leolaia has educated me, (and given me much to read and research ) the clear critical thinking skills of most on here has helped me to reason, and not make mistakes in my life, I can smell a scam now better than ever.

    Good friends who know what you have been through, and may not agree all the time with you, but still respect and care for you are of the highest value, and they are here on wonderful JWN !

    That is why I come here, drunk or sober.

  • GrandmaJones
    GrandmaJones

    Wobble expressed my thoughts well....I can't stay away either and I spend a good deal of time reading old posts and threads. It's been very educating.

  • Markfromcali
    Markfromcali

    Not only is there a matter of being freed from the JW past, you might free yourself from some of the psychological influences in mainstream culture if you should want to take it that far. Also, you are free TO do.. well LIFE, frankly.

    What exJWs go through is a very big deal, to borrow words from that Rush song it's a matter of "who can face the knowledge that the truth is not the truth?" Most people go through their whole life without questioning their ideas about reality, it's much easier to stay in a comfort zone - but not if you really value what is true. This tells me it's people who have some sense of integrity.

  • 1Robinella
    1Robinella

    Hello Luo bou to

    Yup we all have been through it all. I was born and raised a JW and pressured to get baptized at 13 years old. Although I do not blame them, I blame myself for being so absent minded and dingy for not having a mind of my own. 13 is seriously young to make any life altering decisions especially about religion. But as we all know, the pressure is on the youth to commit. Yikes! JW was all that I knew. I had no friends outside the religion (it's frown upon), my whole life was committed to service, studying, commenting at meetings, getting to the meetings early to socialize, demonstrations at the KH and assemblys, pioneering, carpooling around town and visiting those "in need." Yikes, I was busy. We all know the drill. What I am trying to say is that because of all that we have done and been through we definately have a sense of friendship here. At least that's how I feel. Now that I live in a new town, I do not know anyone and had feelings of being lonely this site has helped me to know others are out there too. Although I am not weak, no way going back, it's nice to know people like the people on this site.

    Be strong my friend.

  • Luo bou to
    Luo bou to

    Markfromcali said it's much easier to stay in a comfort zone - but not if you really value what is true. This tells me it's people who have some sense of integrity.

    I remember that moment Mark. Having realized that I had been deceived , and the choice that now lay before me. I valued my faith because I truly believed it was the truth. Now that I knew it wasn't I couldn't support or live a lie. It's not me. I did toy with the idea though, 'cause I then realized for the first time the power the WT had over my life through my JW friends family and wife.

    Thanks to all those that shared Robert (an idealist who sometime thinks life would more comfortable if he was more pragmatic)

  • Dumi
    Dumi

    @ Luo bou to

    So sorry about your wife and family. I relate to the pain and the anger there... this site and JWR are all that is keeping me sane at the moment. I escaped the lucidity two years ago, and had to deal with the guilt and the void alone. Had I found this site earlier, I am certain I would have spared myself sleepless nights...

    What is done is done.

    I am here to heal, and to put my life into perspective, I know that I cannot take back the years lost, but I hope to decode each year spent and to understand the causes and strains of the lucidity state I was once in. Maybe then I will be able to help those that come here raw from the borg.

    I do feel that in here I am amongst friends intellectually and otherwise. So if anyone has any need that I can satisfy dont hesitate to PM me.

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