A JW MOTHER'S SO CALLED LOVE

by elm 26 Replies latest jw friends

  • elm
    elm

    Hello hadit and little imp,

    I thank you both for your kind words it has helped me to help my sister a lot. It was hard to know whether to post this horrible event or not I do feel some how disloyal to my mother, but it was my sister I was thinking of and it is my sister life that has been damaged by this. I have read out all your comments to my sister (she has no access to a computer) and slowly she is starting to realize that it is not her fault.

    I'm sure that your husband when he feels that the time is right will post his story here, he will receive only love and support like my sister has, which helps to heal.

  • Hadit
    Hadit

    You are welcome Elm - I'm glad we are able to help in some way. That is so sweet of you to relay our messages to your sister! It made me tear up to read that. Please send her lots of love and hugs from me! This is NOT her fault in any way. She has lots of support. I wish the best for her healing as well as yours.

    Little Imp - thank you for your kind words! I truly hope your husband can share his story here one day. It helps to get it out and it will help in his healing process. I wish you guys all the best too.

  • Scully
    Scully

    Wow, your mother claims that her son-in-law raped her repeatedly over a period of six weeks? Yet everyone got on very well the entire time? And she felt the need to confess to the Elders™ and Repent™? And your sister was questioned by the Elders™ regarding alleged "headaches" (which is code for: Not Rendering the Marital Due™) - apparently someone trying to throw her under the bus and lay blame on her for an affair/rape between her husband and her mother??

    Will these ridiculous people EVER take responsibility for their own choices and behaviour?? Will they ever STOP blaming the innocent victims for their flagrant disrespect and violations of trust??

    :: disgusted ::

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers
    What gets me is my mam 24 years ago showed repentance, and was forgiven by the elders and the congregation, but my sister's life was damaged, and because I no longer believe that the JW's are the truth I'm shunned and my children. But as long as my mam continues to go to meetings and out on the work she is in a good standing with Jehovah a true Christian !!

    This message is for you and your sister. The Watchtower is a cult, and cults are only interested in submission. It couldn't care less about morality. Your mother is quite obviously a predator. She vcitimized her children, husband, son in law, and grandchildren. The only reason she's still a jw is because she understands how to manipulate the system by seeming submissive while at the same tme thinking herself moral and upright. There are many jw predators who leave victims in their wake and remain in good standing in the congregation. Look at all of the child molesters and wife beaters who have committed their many and various crimes and are protected by the Watchtower while the victims fall by the wayside.

  • elm
    elm

    Hello Hadit,........We thank you for your caring words. You don't know how much they have helped.

    Hello Scully........I agree with everything you have said, my mam committed the crime along with my ex brother in law but once she so called repented she was then welcomed and protected by the congregation. My sister the victim and her 6 week old son was left to get on with it. There was no encouraging words or any offer of support.

    Hello Jamiebowers.....I also now believe that the watchtower is a cult, and that is one of the reasons my mam for one will never leave, I will try to explain.........When I think back to my childhood my mam has manipulated us on everything we say do and feel. We were never allowed to think for ourselves, unless we agreed with my mam. So when my mam started to study with the JW's they were heaven sent for my mam.

    My mam became even more controlling through the watchtower. I remember one time when we were due to leave school, my mam sat us down and said we had 2 choices when we left school we either get a full time job or pioneered.....but if we chose to get a full time job we had to leave home. I think the watchtower and my mam suit each other.

  • new light
    new light

    Welcome to the board, Elm!

    That is a pretty shocking story, and that is impressive in the world of JW craziness. Your mother joined an exclusive club by schtupping her new son-in-law, but claiming it was rape and trashing this guy's already tarnished reputation even more all these years later in front of his own children puts her in elite company.

    She is one antisocial, narrcissistic hellcat!

    You mentioned your father was living in the house also. How did he take the news and what became of him?

  • elm
    elm

    Hello new light,

    My dad loves my mam and stands by her decisions, no matter what they are. There is no doubt in his mind that what my mam said about the affair (rape)was the truth. My dad gave her all the support love and understanding that she needed, and still to this day believes it was rape.

    My mam makes all the decisions in their marriage and always has done. My sister and my brother and I know that if it wasn't for my mam my dad wouldn't be a JW, he only goes to make her happy. In fact as long as I remember we have all in our family done everything to make my mam happy. It made life a lot easier if my mam was kept happy.

    So of course I went against the grain, when I found out that the truth wasn't the truth, and told my mam in fact I will post the letter I sent her (when I find how to do it)

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