by Ranchette 44 Replies latest jw friends
Hi Norm,
I fail to understand what people on the board can do about this. What do you suggest?
The people on this Board have already done something. They have expressed their concerns regarding the reliability and ethics of a person on this Board who recieved a photograph from Prisca, and then against her personal interests sent that picture to others for a malevolent intent.
An apology to Prisca by that person would put many emotions to rest I am sure.
Best regards - HS
Hello every one,
I had to leave right after I posted this thread and I just got home.
I was shocked to see all these posts.
I have yet to read them all.
But in the meantiime because of the first couple I read I want to say for now that I believe it is wrong to post private info including photos without permission.
I also believe Prisca had the right to be upset.
I just don't believe the whole truth will ever come out and I was really wondering if yall are as sick of it all as I am.
Ranchette
I want to thank every one for their input and if I don’t comment to you personally I want you to know that all of your comments were appreciated.
Simon,
I want you to know that I never meant to give the impression that posting private info is okay. I agree with you it is wrong.
Blue Sapphire,
Thank you for such a balanced opinion. I appreciate you looking at the whole matter and not just choosing sides.
We need more of this on this board.
GDW,
I agree it does sound as if I am blaming Prisca for what happened to her.
I believe I was really trying to get across my frustration and feelings of futility with this whole matter.
I believe my true feelings will become clearer as this post continues.
Safe4kids,
You said,
Sometimes, life's most valuable lessons are the ones that hurt the most.How sad but true this statement is!
In this case, as unfortunate as it was, many of us can learn from what happened to Prisca.
And I believe they already have.
Notice these words from Xena,
Well I certainly have learned something from this and in the future will be a LOT more careful about who I send pics and private info to!!!teejay,
I should be able to send someone any piece of personal information that I want with the expectation and confidence that they will adhere to the commonly accepted standards of cyberspace etiquette.I agree you should but the sad truth is we can’t always be that trusting.
Okay,Now I’m just going to ignore that you basically called me stupid!
Moving along, you said,
There will come a time—twenty or thirty years from now—when SOME people will be forced to admit who is really justified at being upset and who really was at fault in the matter of Prisca's personal information/identity being put on display here on JW.com for more than two hours.
HS,
You said,
I suspect your motive in bringing this up is the commendable desire to bring peace to what is now a now long-term problem on this Board.Your suspicion is correct.
You also said,
My advise is for a person never to reveal personal and traceable details of themselves to persons who have not earned that trust. To do so is to invite trouble.Good advise for us all.
Gravedancer,
Here are my answers to your questions.
1. Was it wrong for Prisca's pic to be posted? YES
2. Was it wrong for Prisca's pic to have been forwarded to ANYONE else without her permission?YES
3. Should we all be careful what we tell others about ourselves?YES
4. Is Prisca owed an apology?YES but don’t hold your breath.
5. Are you tired of seeing Prisca and her opposers pissing all over every thread?
YES but I wouldn’t say it was EVERY thread.
6. If you answer YES to point number 6, does this change the answers to any of the first 5 questions? I think you meant to say question #5? Anyway I know what you mean and my answer is NO
7. Are you sick of all the pissing by all the posters on the board? I sure don’t like this kind of pissing either!
April,
You said,
But, I do think the matter should be dropped, because the only way she'll ever know who the culprit is, is if they confess and apologize. I'm doubtful of that happening any time soon. Of course, miracles do happen....
teejay,
You asked,
how many of those hoping to dismiss the wrong done to her would be as easily dismissive if the wrong had been done TO THEM? If the shoe was on the other foot, I doubt there would be as many saying, "Get over it."Good question.
Tracy,
I agree with almost every thing you said to Prisca here.
Thank you for these comments.
Venice,
Thanks for your input.
You said,
each time you bring it up, you open yourself up for hurt and for someone to figure out what happened.I have had this same concern.
Prisca,
Thanks for not being offended that I voiced my opinion on this and that I asked others for theirs. I appreciate your feelings too.
I hope we all can learn from this.
You can handle this however you want but would you at least consider having a specific thread for these discussions and maybe handle some of it privately?
Ranchette
Can someone please point me to the Ex-JW support board? I'm really surprised that more people aren't pleading with the perpetrator to come forward publicly or privately in an effort to end this matter instead of pleading with the victim to shut up. Injustice is not so easily silenced, it screams out to be satisfied and justice is usually the only thing that will satiate it. No one should tell a victim to shut up already, it does much harm to their psyche.
Look how we rally against the Watchtower society for not stepping up to the plate and admitting error, choosing instead to lay blame at the feet of those it has misled. The same is happening here. Prisca is to blame for trusting people. Shutup already Prisca, get over it. The real person to blame should have never let things escalate to this point. At this point it may be very difficult to confess.
I can see that some have issues with Prisca and I don't know anything about her but that has nothing to do with the real issue here unless she is guilty of the same act in the past.
If someone had wronged me in this forum and I sought their identity, I would shout it from the rooftops. And I would allow no one to convince me to let it go if I chose to pursue it. While it is true that Prisca may find that she is getting absolutely nowhere in her quest, how long she wishes to continue is for her alone to decide.
It also didn't appear to me that she went looking for a new soapbox upon which to air the wrong yet again; someone asked for evidence of transgression on the part of some posters here and she supplied an example. Again, this is well within her right as a wronged person and it was completely on topic in that thread as far as validating a fear on the part of Kismet that someone might publish info on him.
Of course, this is just my opinion as a person who would like to see the matter come to a close but who recognizes there is a better way to settle a problem than just ignoring it.
Hey SIMON!
Are you going to go thru those chat logs and inform the newbies here of who they should be cautious of ,or not?
(post edited in the interests of not turning this serious issue into a flame thread. apologies to Focus)
.
Hi Prisca,Ranchette, and everyone, I just came across this discussion, and started reading some of the posts,even though I agree with alot of what many are saying about letting this issue end, I do tend to agree with Yrs2long regarding telling a victim of a perpetration to shut up and get over it. When we are wronged by whom we trust, we want to scream for justice, because we believe that there has to be goodness and that it will come. We also want the perpetrator to own up to the wrong, especially when they were trusted. For a victim to be blamed and corrected for what happened is equal to saying to a rape victim that "you should have known better than to......, the victim feels horrible and enough without having to be told you are to blame, stop looking for attention. Whew, that is all to familiar. Victims never look for attention. They look for validation, and to be heard, no matter what the crime. Whether it be sex abuse, or any other form of mistreatment by trusted ones. It is just only natural for Prisca to feel the way she does. We all keep harping on the injustices of the Watchtower here on this DB, and many very well have commented on this fact and say to get over it already, get a life etc. Perpetration is perpetration and injustice is injustice, and those who want to speak out about it, have a perfect place to do it. This board should be a place to discuss feelings and issues, and, we all know that none of us are always going to have the same opinions. But that is the great thing about this board. Sometimes though, it seems to become like our old ties to the Watchtower, in that we can, and do become guilty of re-enacting old judgmental JW behavior towards oneanother[;]
A roarer.
What if the people prisca believes involved in the posting of her picture, The people who attack prisca so vehemently ....what if some of those people are also involved in the Kismet threatened exposure?
Dont forget!
This current discussion started, NOT about Priscas picture, but about blackmailing threats to expose Kismets identity publicly.
What if its the same people?
If that is so, then doesnt the board need protecting from those people? Because, if they will do it to 2 people, maybe they will do it again...again...again.
Refiners Fire, Yes you are right, that is what I was trying to convey in my above post. Kismet was victimized, and although I am not up on that particular situation, I only really was aware of Prisca's story, but, the same should hold true. A perpetrator is a perpetrator, and the victim is a victim no matter what. The victim should not be told to get over it, and that this can be a safe place, whether it be Pricsa, Kismet, or even me for that matter, without people re-enacting old Watchtower attitude of "put it behind you and get over it". There is alway a time when a victim is able to resolve what has happened and able to talk about it less. But that is individual for each victim. We who have not walked in Prisca's or Kismet's shoes can not and should not blame and shame, and publicly correct them for speaking out. Perpetration is pepetration, no matter what form it takes, and the perpetrator needs enablers to re-victimize. This forum rather than blaming and shaming Prisca or Kismet or anyone else for the unfortunate thing that was done to them because they simply trusted, should in fact talk about blaming the perps and not telling the ones wronged to stop speaking about it or blaming and shaming them. We have all had enough of that from the Watchtower Society. I simply mean that this is a good place to be able to speak about wrongs, and also speak about opinions. Every individual who has posted her on this subject has all been free to post thier opinion even though we all may differ in what we feel. That is what I meant abut this board being a good place to do this. My opinion was stated and that was what this particular thread was entitled. And again, I am not familiar with the Kismet story. Frankly I only learned of Prisca's story last night when, or rather early in the A M when I was unable to sleep I came down on the computer and saw this thread. But yes I agree with you Ref.
Aroarer,
Thanks for your understanding. We (you and me) have been violated in different ways, yet we seek justice for the wrongs committed.
I appreciate your comments.
Hello Refiners,
You said:
What if its the same people?Yes, so I have to repeat my questions. What can the board possibly do about it? How can the board find out who or how many has Prisca's pic and Kismet's name and address. And if the board could find that out, how do you propose measures could be taken by the board to prevent such info from being posted?If that is so, then doesnt the board need protecting from those people? Because, if they will do it to 2 people, maybe they will do it again...again...again.
Do you think Simon is able to prevent people from accessing the net? Can Simon access people's computer and ban material on their hard drives? Do the person[s] need this board to publish such information?
Would anything anyone on this board could do prevent someone from making a web page with Prisca's picture and Kismets address if someone having that info really wanted to do that?
The only way this can be solved is that Kismet and Prisca take this up with the person[s] in question and try to come to some kind of arrangement.
To use this board as some kind of public pillory where people can heap scorn and hatred on the alleged perpertrator[s] of these horrible crimes is I am afraid very counterproductive.
Norm
