Not a big deal to some but a big deal to me!

by Simon Morley 24 Replies latest jw friends

  • Simon Morley
    Simon Morley

    2010:07:01 offically "Inactive" - whats next? - flurry of calls?, CO/COBoE "we want to encourage you..."? Given the vitrolic nature of my exit I doubt they want to come around. Anyway, it was a big deal to celebrate that today....

  • miseryloveselders

    It's a big deal for those of us not in your shoes too Simon. Not to sound like Celine Dion or anything, but you give us inspiration. I hope to be inactive some day too. Good for your dude.

  • beksbks
  • serenitynow!

    Congrats! What's next is the rest of your life hopefully free of a cult. For me when I happen upon people in my congo, they say how they miss me, that's about it.

  • Borgdrone

    I to would like to stop putting in time for field service. What should I expect to say to my group overseer on August 1, 2010 whe he pays me a phone call for time? Maybe zero hours?

  • changeling

    Congrats! When I hit the 6 mos. no time reported (inactive) mark I was elated. Then I marked the year and then the next. It's 4 years this month!

    I've faded rather gracefully and have had no issues with being hounded. I wish the same to you! :)

  • yknot
  • Simon Morley
    Simon Morley

    We started our fade in Dec 09 (I stopped serving as an elder in early 2009). In Jan '10 we were missing 75%, and when the SGO called for our time I said that we were dealing with some personal problems and that we would let the SGO know when we had time to report, but we did not expect to have any for the forseable future. We had a visit in Feb '10, but we had not been to any meetings for several weeks. I again reitterated that personal matters took greater importance than FS and I would gladly let them know when we had time to report again. They seemed okay with that.

    I reached a point in late 2009 when I could not in good concscience go to a persons door and encourage them to join when I had serious doubts myself. Also, I had pictures in my mind of what would I do, if in time, they too were exposed to the same toxic environment that I was still putting up with for over 25 years. How would I help them deal with the harmful effects of those who belie the claim to have “love amongst themselves” (John 13:34) and have proven to be “accuser(s) of our brothers” (Rev 12:10). I simply could not do it.

    I am in a much more peacful state but getting the ""dub" out of me continues to proves to be hard. However, I can now feel okay facing the odd cong member who spouts of about not being at meetings and the whole Prov 18:1 thing. To which I reply that I have simply applied to counsel at Prov 22:3 " Shrewd is the one that has seen the calamity and proceeds to conceal himself". I love the puzzled expression.

    Again, I am enjoying this mini milestone and I have enjoyed the encouragement, support and advice many have given on this site.

    Simon Morley

  • SweetBabyCheezits

    Nice use of Prov. 22:3, Simon. I'll have to remember that one.

  • Coffee House Girl
    Coffee House Girl

    Yup, been inactive for almost 10 months now & just literally sold some guitar strings to two dubs (yea I am at work sneaking on this site)- it wasnt too awkward- they pretended not to know me and I took their money and they left without a word

    Congrats to you, will they call and bother you??? it depends on the cong. you once went to (you know the elders better than most being an ex-elder) I hope for your sake they are lazy and too scared of you to bother-

    what is the next milestone for you? no convention this year??? this will be my first year not going-

    glad you are celebrating living your life!


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