Getting my children out

by God_Delusion 21 Replies latest jw experiences

  • transhuman68
    transhuman68

    God_Delusion, this is just an idea, but if you can get the 1925 newspaper scans of the "Millions now living" campaign, and scans from the older publications, you might be able to convince your wife that Armageddon isn't coming any time soon, and the WTS is a fake. Might help...

  • finallyfree!
    finallyfree!

    Good luck!! If there are no major marital problems, try and keep your wife on your side. In other words don't make any big rash moves. Evidently she is still brainwashed by the society and she probably has the elders "helping" her without your knowledge. I personally know elders that have literally split up families by telling the wife or husband that they can get a scriptural divorce based on spiritual endangerment...or in laymans terms based on the fact that you can see through the whole scam they will try to cut you out of the picture. Its sad but it happens. Instead try the approach that you've been praying about several things you don't agree with and that you have come to the conclusion that all is not as rosy and unblemished as it appears in the org. Show her all your findings based on the bible and their own literature from the wts. This will slowly get her thinking as jws are taught to hear selectively. Open up to hard and fast and they'll dismiss you as an apostate. Even trying the "I was wondering if you could do some research on a topic I have a hard time understanding, like the generation flop. This way she can come to a realization that a lot of things are just plain silly. Always focus on one topic and one topic only as if not you'll get lost in the jw shuffle. They're famous for changing the topic when they're wrong or they can't answer the question. Good luck!! I hope your wife comes around as its no fun having to be single again especially with kiddies. But like someone I admire once said, "its better to stand alone with the truth than surrounded by a buncha sellouts with lies"

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    You can't 'tell' a JW anything. They are trained to not listen.

    You have to ask questions. Nicely. Then you have to keep them on topic. Nicely.

    They are taught that Jehovah is going to kill you. Not very nicely.

    They are taught that they have the knowledge to save you and your kids, so use that notion to get them to try to explain it to you, nicely, without using any goddam freakin bullshit.

    Cheers

    Chris

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Get this book out of the library and get your wife used to the idea that you will be using it to teach your children how to think.

    There is nothing in the book that a JW should be able to object to, even if it makes them feel a little uncomfortable.

    Teach Your Child How to Think by Edward de Bono

    Cheers

    Chris

  • Mad Sweeney
    Mad Sweeney

    Black Sheep has it. Use questions and use them sincerely. Don't let them change the subject without giving you a real answer and don't let them pass you off on to elders. YOUR JW has to answer for herself.

    Also, if logic doesn't work with her, more and better logic will make no difference. You need an emotional approach. Make life at home MUCH MORE ENJOYABLE than life at the meetings or in service. She will only be able to fight off the dissonance for so long without being forced to deal with it.

  • Quandry
    Quandry

    lso, if logic doesn't work with her, more and better logic will make no difference. You need an emotional approach. Make life at home MUCH MORE ENJOYABLE than life at the meetings or in service. She will only be able to fight off the dissonance for so long without being forced to deal with it.

    Mad Sweeney is right. Drawing a line in the sand about your children will make them pawns in a fight, and could tear your family apart. Love and patience will win more.

  • changeling
    changeling

    Wow, this is a tough situation! How I wish I had gotten out when my kids were little!

    While I get where you're coming from and would be tempted to do the same, the poster who said that your wife will garner praise and support for circumventing your position is right. Do you want to become "an example" of a persecutor? Your wife (or any good witness) would run with this.

    If you value your marriage and family life, I would tread carefully. Maybe allow your wife to take the kids only to the Sunday meetings and last day of convention, but not middle of the week and no field service? You could say your feel they are little and need their sleep... You could use the going to bed early for school line when they are a bit older.

    If you work with her and not against her, things may work out better for you in the end.

    Whatever you decide, I wish you the best and hope you enjoy a happy life with your family. :)

  • carla
    carla

    Good for you! I'm proud of you for protecting your children and I know how damn hard life will be for you for doing it. Wishing you all the best, carla

  • alice.in.wonderland
    alice.in.wonderland

    God_Delusion, what religion do you believe is not a "cult."

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    I totally respect your stance, and if your wife really believes in the Bible as much as she says she does, she'll obey her own rules and respect your headship.

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