Question about moving from one congregation to another

by dgp 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • dgp
    dgp

    I understand that, if you want to move from a congregation to another, you need some sort of a letter from the previous congregation. Is that so, really? I suppose that would be the root of many an abuse by the elders of the old congregation. What can you guys tell me?

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    "You" don't need it. Whenever the elders forward your "publisher card," they also write a letter of introduction. For a family, they will write just one letter. They can be ruthless and violate privacy in many cases. They sometimes don't write much at all, though. The letter will at least say if the person is a publisher "in good standing" and what his "privileges" were in the congregation.

    I have a feeling that times are changing and these letters say less and less. They are not for the members' eyes, so some elders might still write details about attitudes, promptness, usefulness, how they feel about the person or the family.

  • dgp
    dgp

    Thank you very much, On the Way. I get it: your "reputation" follows you wherever you go. I assume this means that a body of elders who made your life miserable can make sure your life is made miserable elsewhere, too. And, if you worked hard in your previous congregation, they will expect you to work hard there, too.

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    You got it. I knew of some that were afraid to move congs. while there was a problem between them.

  • RR
    RR

    I remember when I left the congregation, I had stepped down a few months earlier, kicked the bookstudy out of my home, quit the school and refused to be an attendant. I told the elders that I was only going out in field service. When we left and joined another congregation a few miles away. The rumors started. In my old congo, I was unofficially charged with being an apostate, things got so bad that the Society sent a special representative to investigate, nothing was proven, no evidence pointed to me. But in the new congo, all of a sudden the elders at every opportunity coorelated everything to apostasy. It didn't matter what the subject was, apostasy found itself mentioned. So I knew the elders in my old congo mentioned something to the new elders. We lasted another few months, before we walked away and never returned, that was 20 years ago.

    RR

  • Think About It
    Think About It

    I remember a pioneer in his early 50's coming to the cong. He was an MS where he came from, but you wondered with his age, spirituality, and credentials why he wan't an elder. Well, we soon found out. The BOE's from his previous cong. sent a multi-page letter listing every pet peave they had with the guy. It was embarrassing, ridiculous, unprofessional, unloving, unchristian and absolutely uncalled for. What was really sad was that some of our elders judged this guy afterwards based on 2nd hand info contained in this letter from an elder they knew nothing about.

    Think About It

  • baltar447
    baltar447

    Unfortunately the new BOE will defer to the old BOE's letter, even if it's biased or bad. They will at least hold off a while before a recommendation if they get a less than favorable letter. This happened to a guy I know. He was an MS, moved and the bro that was secretary didn't like him so he ripped him a new one. Took him a long time to be appointed again.

  • ana_dote
    ana_dote

    that's one thing I NEVER EVER EVER liked. The whole "we're keeping a record on you, but you're not allowed to know what it says" thing. Who the F*CK do they think they are?!?!?! I mean, how UNchristian can you be, keeping track of EVERY SINGLE FLAW a person has and then freely passing that along to wherever they move??? Sure, MAYBE there are some good things mentioned in these letters or on these "publisher cards".....but in all reality, we all know that it was just a way to keep track of who screwed up, when, and how.

    grrr....sorry....it's just friggin STUPID.

  • TheOldHippie
    TheOldHippie

    Yeah, just stupid, and should never be done!

    ........ehhhhhh.......but, wait for a second, are you not the same guys who state it is a shame that new congregations are not informed if a pedo perv moves to town?

    So no information letter should be sent - but information on possible sexual perversions SHOULD be sent?

    Seems to me you can't have it both ways?

  • ana_dote
    ana_dote

    hippie - there is a BIIIIIG difference between being notified of someone (in your example a pedo perv) who is a clear threat/danger and someone who has, say, had sex with their g/f or b/f before they were married and felt bad about it.

    I'm not necessarily saying that NO information about a person should be sent as reference....HOWEVER, I FIRMLY believe that the person in question should at least have access to what is being said about them. When you have an opportunity for such secrecy or "confidentiality", then any old elder with a bone to pick can write whatever crap he wants about you and thus give you a bad reputation based solely on their opinion and not on anything scripturally relevant. Anybody with any kind of "mark" on their record (i.e. prior df-ing, reproof, inactivity, etc) is now going to be branded by that mark for who knows how long...probably for life! If a person got publicly reproved 10 years ago but now wants to pioneer, an elder will look at their publisher card, see everything about that person's past and then JUDGE them based on that little card. It doesn't matter if they've had a "clean record" of activity ever SINCE that issue....all the elders will see is that reproof and immediately question whether or not that person should be approved for greater privileges. The system is highly flawed and so easily at risk for unethical tampering. If you're going to say "this person got reproved 10 years ago"....I think that person has the right to know that you're saying that about them....because to THEM, they've gotten over it, they've moved on, everyone claims that God has forgiven the error and chooses to no longer even call it to mind....and yet the elders keep track. It is in NO WAY scriptural.

    you know...it's kinda like your credit report.....only certain people can have access to it to determine what offers of privilege you qualify for....BUT you still are capable of looking at your own credit report to see the positives and negatives and make personal adjustments to improve the report.

    There is a HUGE difference between informing the new congregation of a potential danger and simply spreading someone else's business. I would venture to say that 90-99% of these "publisher cards" serve no purpose other than to gossip.

    If you are not a former witness (which, from the way you wrote your response, it doesn't sound like you are...) then you have NO IDEA what it is like. So don't try to twist it around and call US the hypocrites simply because we're pointing out the fallacy of the "publisher card arrangement".

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