My post about my dad exposing himself and elder saying it never happened was to show how crazy this religion is.

by life is to short 10 Replies latest watchtower scandals

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  life is to short

  I just wanted to let everyone know that my post on my dad exposing himself and the elder who said it never happened was to let everyone know how crazy this religion is.

  Everyone seems to think that I am suck in having to keep going. I AM NOT GOING TO THE MEETINGS. Please understand that. What I wanted was help in not feeling so crazy. OK those of you who have not been abused might not understand. But for those who have been or at least me, I tried to tell myself it did not happen, that I was making it up because I did not want it to be true. But it was true. I was raped and abused as a kid.

  To now be told in my mid 40's that I made it all up EVEN though I know that it did happen still really hurts. I just wanted to show you on the board how crazy this is. If I a woman in her 40's is being tried to make me believe I made it up what chance in hell dose a child have in talking to the elders. NONE.

  Please everyone understand how this is very threating to children in this religion. Please do not tell me the obvious to not go to the meetings and to get help. I am getting help. My counselor did not want me to do this in fact and to just walk away. I keep telling her I do not know how to that to just walk away when I know children are or could be being raped? Look at the move 'Doubt"

  If I was in world war 2 would I walk away from helping save the Jews. Would I leave a family of Jew with children to die and just walk away knowing that I might be able to help.

  I know maybe child molesters are not as bad as the SS and maybe that is a poor example to many. But child rape kills you slowly. It kills your soul. There have been many times I wish I could have just died instead of living being raped as a kid is beyond horrible. If I know what I know then I should just get out of this religion and walk away without trying to let people know when I might be able to do something? I am not DF'ed yet though I have been threatened with it. But the elders are really scarred right now. They are all saying different things this older elder was just more expreanced that other elders.

  I want to help the children who are in this religion. That is why I am asking because I feel like I am going crazy and maybe everyone is right just look out for number one forget everyone else. But does not evil prevail when good people do nothing.

  LITS
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  cantleave

  I am glad you are out. But have you sought professional help to help you through this?
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  nugget

  sex crimes are some of the worst to deal with and can haunt you for decades. You think you are over it and then you discover you are not. In the hall where immorality, fornication and spiritual cleanliness are frequent topics you have past experiences constantly brought back to mind. In JCs you are made to show how sorry you are for what you did rather than have an opportunity to say it really wasn't your fault and you were a victim. Children who are targeted by sexual predators have to endure a life time of pain and guilt and the torment of walking away and leaving potential victims unprotected is a dreadful load to carry.

  It sounds like the elders are the worst kind putting company policy ahead of humanity and common sense. Witnesses are told not to judge and not to ask questions so are ill equipped to make judgements about sexual predators based on who says prayers at meetings. Sexual predators are surrounded by young innocent children with no checks or balances on their behaviour thus increasing opportunities to reoffend. This is not shepherding the flock it is a disaster waiting to happen.

  I don't know what I would do in your position. I would seek therapy from professionals to help deal with how I had been messed up but in view of potential risks to others that is hard. I'd seek advice from specialists in the area as to the best approach. I know once when visiting a hall I was taken aside and told discreetly not to let my children go to the toilet unattended as there was a convicted child molester attending meetings. I was grateful for the heads up. I didn't need to know who it was it was sufficient to know that there was cause for concern. I wonder how many other halls I have visited where the threat was present but no one told me? I have always been vigilant but others are like sheep and don't even consider the possibility.
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  Quando

  I am new here, well long time lurker...

  I was molested as child, raised in truth but my offender was not a witness. I understand the feelings of how this horrible event can slowly kill a person. I can also tell you that their are sex offenders in every religion and maybe more so in cults like JW, I know that you can get to a point of peace, I am living proof of it.

  Protecting your children is #1 and I use educating them as my weapon, I was never educated and I have forgiven my offender, he was F@!cked up...NOT ME!

  I Wish you the best on getting your power back :)
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  yknot

  I can't help but wonder if this elder too has some sort of sexual deviant past....... all that crap about your husband is soooo present in congregations where the BOE are compromised of men born before the 60s!!!!!! (Esp those born in the 20s-30s).

  I can tell you what I would have done....... while attending I would have 'innocently' asked each parent privately why they were alllowing a convicted molester hold their child.....pause and than add well maybe yall are like couple xyz who too didn't know that so and so was a molester.... making a point to have the state sex offender registry print-outs in my bookbag along with the state's web addy ......

  We had one attend our KH, two elders knew (NaziPO and Henchman) and kept it from the BOE. I am not sure what the BS conductor said to the man but I never saw him attending after the following Sunday.

  In all fairness, a person cannot change their past, in theory church attendance can encourage abstaining from acting out on their deviant behavior but of course it equally provides opportunity if members are unsuspecting. Personally I had no problem with the man attending, he was respectful, sat alone, kept his distance and never used the public bathroom...... he knew his place as someone who the state says is a 'moderate' threat. What I had a problem with was the lack of disclosure, people have the right to make up their own minds.

  The fact that these people in your KH were holding children show they didn't have a 'proper view' of their past and are priming their next victims in my opinon.

  If you are really worried go back to the KH and make a point to confirm each person's address and send them a Thinking of You' Card, not a letter a Card..... people open Cards out of sheer interest whereas a letter might be easily tossed...... Include all the molesters state sex offender printouts.
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  yknot

  Quando

  Welcome hug

  hug to 'Life' too for bring this to light and sharing her experience! Many lurkers will benefit!
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  cantleave

  Welcome to the group Quando. I'm pleased you have been able to move forward with your life. Start a topic and introduce yourself to the board.
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  Snoozy

  It seems that these days it's all about forgiveness..I will just never understand that.

  If someone had molested / raped me as a child I would want to de-throne him for good when I got older!

  Forgiveness is supposed to be for the one that was molested/raped but I wouldn't give them the satisfaction...

  I saw a rapist meet face to face with his victim on a TV talk show and they hugged each other..

  That's when I would have done it!!!

  Forgiveness is over-rated!!!

  No way...no-way...and I wouldn't forget either...and I would make sure they didn't either..one way or another.

  Snoozy..the cold hearted never forgive/forget the pain they caused B..
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  dgp

  Snoozy, beyond its moral or religious value, forgiveness is a way to let go of the pain and start anew. I was not fortunate to have had the experience that made me learn this, but I am lucky to have learned this lesson.
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  dgp

  Welcome, Quando!