Hello!! GOOD to "see" you here and, of course, may you have peace!
For JW,s and EX JW,s partaking of the emblems can be a very difficult thing. Because the organization has created a fear in many that they are unworthy and that it is the wt organization that determines whether or not a person should partake.
Sadly, yes! It was a "clue" to me, toward the "end" that they REALLY weren't who they say they are... to ANY extent! Why? Because of our Lord's words:
47 I tell you the truth, he who believes has everlasting life.
What is it that we are to believe? Our Lord goes on:
48 I am the bread of life. 49 Your forefathers ate the manna in the desert, yet they died. 50 But here is the bread that comes down from heaven, which a man may eat and not die. 51 I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever. This bread is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world."
52 Then the Jews began to argue sharply among themselves, "How can this man give us his flesh to eat?"
53 Jesus said to them, "I tell you the truth, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. 54 Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day. 55 For my flesh is real food and my blood is real drink. 56 Whoevereats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in him. 57 Just as the living Father sent me and I live because of the Father, so the one who feeds on me will live because of me. 58 This is the bread that came down from heaven. Your forefathers ate manna and died, but he who feeds on this bread will live forever."
Our Lord said ANYONE who ate the bread that is his flesh... WILL live forever. And WHOEVER eats his flesh and drinks his blood HAS eternal life and he WILL raise that one up. And WHOEVER eats his flesh and drinks his blood REMAINS in union with him and he with them. We have come to know that we EXERCISE our FAITH in this truth... by eating and drinking!!
Yet, the WTBTS has taught and still teaches that SOME... should NOT eat and drink. What a BLASPHEMY!! They are indeed "shutting up the kingdon of the heavens before men"!
We eat, my dear brother, BECAUSE of our faith - faith that by DOING so... we WILL live forever. That even if our FLESH (which is of no use at all) should die... our SPIRITS will live eternally. And not as vaporous phantoms but as spirit beings with BODIES... SPIRIT bodies... which have NO sin or death IN them. Because it is by means of this eating that spirit beings live, as recorded at Psalm 78:25:
21 When the LORD heard them, he was very angry;
his fire broke out against Jacob,
and his wrath rose against Israel,
22 for they did not believe in God
or trust in his deliverance.
23 Yet he gave a command to the skies above
and opened the doors of the heavens;
24 he rained down manna for the people to eat,
he gave them the grain of heaven.
25 Men ate the bread of angels; he sent them all the food they could eat. "
Our Lord, however, is recorded to say that HE is that bread:
28Then they asked him, "What must we do to do the works God requires?" 29 Jesus answered, "The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent." 30 So they asked him, "What miraculous sign then will you give that we may see it and believe you? What will you do? 31 Our forefathers ate the manna in the desert; as it is written: 'He gave them bread from heaven to eat.'" 32 [Jesus] said to them, "I tell you the truth, it is not Moses who has given you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. 33 For the bread of God is he who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world."
34 "Sir," they said, "from now on give us this bread." 35 Then [Jesus] declared, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty."
It is my SOLE wish, my dear brother, that ALL those with ears to hear WILL hear... and get the SENSE of this truth! Because NOTHING would glorify the Father MORE... nor glorify the Son more... than for those who were previously misled and prevented from entering to COME TO THE DOOR and gain access! Can you imagine it: millions now living NOT dying... to the glory of God and Christ... and the SHAME and exposing of our Adversary as the Liar that he is!
And that is why I "continue" in the "work" of our Lord, dear Matrixx. I was/am a sinner... and yet, he has shown ME mercy by revealing this truth to ME: that all I need do is go to HIM... and eat and drink of HIS flesh and blood... so that he and the Father can come and dwell IN me... and by doing so, mix THEIR blood... holy spirit... with MY blood... so that I can HEAR them speak (for it is the blood that speaks)... hear their voice(s)... which voice(s) have guided me... and are guiding me... into ALL truth! How can one turn their back on something like that?? I can't!
And the ONLY way I can show MY love (for them as individuals) and appreciation (for what they've given ME)... for what do I have that is of any value to them?... is to share it with ANYONE WHO WILL LISTEN... anyone with ears to hear. In that way, perhaps more will hear the "call" and ANSWER... to the glory of God and Christ.
You are one such person, dear Matrixx... as is your household... for, what, over a decade now, yes? And you and your household have taken up the same "work" as I during this time... for the same reason(s). Together with me and MY household. MY prayer for YOU, then, is that our Father, the Most Holy One of Israel, JAH of Armies, and His Son and Christ, our Lord, the Holy Spirit and Holy One of Israel, continue to grant you and your household their love and peace... to time indefinite. For we have already partaken of His mercy, have we not? We have.
May JAH bless you, to time indefinite!
YOUR servant, sister, and fellow slave of Christ,
Shel