metal health problems in the organisation

by looloo 21 Replies latest jw experiences

  • looloo
    looloo

    for "the happiest people on earth" i found so many folk in the cong had depression or suffered with "nerves and axiety" there was one lad who was due to go and "work" in bethel and changed his mind at the last minute and spent nearly all his time on his computer in his bedroom from then on (he must of been on this site !he apparently "went schitsophrenic(dont know how to spell it sorry ) as did his sister and his poor mum was probably the most dedicated dub in the cong but was considered as a bit "bonkers" by all in the cong . there were 3 elders i know of who had depression and many rank and file , i must admit it did make me question how "happy "being a dub would make me when i was a study and voiced my concerns i was told satan was trying to get them out the truth so they were depressesed or some rubbish like that , but i was also told that people who leave the truth are depressed because they dont have the truth ! you cant have it both ways ! all i know is looking back on my life the only time i suffered from depression was the 7 years i was involved on and off with that cult , in fact i was even more depressed (and often even suicidal)than when i found out my child was abused by a ex jw i had met at the kingdom hall where i was lead to believe everyone was trustwourty ! are people mentally ill because of that cult or does it attract the mentally ill , i was very "normal" before i got involved .

  • Losteverything
    Losteverything

    I'm so sorry to hear about your child being abused! Thats terrible. It's sad to say but it seems every religion has their crazys, even the one that professes to be the one and only "True" religion. I've experience the same thing with depression in the halls. My brother as one example attempted suicide twice and was hospitalized both times. He was ready to walk away and finally leave the JWs but met a girl and got married now he's stuck. I'm not going to lie and say I wasnt depressed at times. It was horrible never being good enough and costantly being compared to the bethalites in the hall. I think the religion may attract people who NEED to believe in something, anything. People who cannot think for themselves and would much rather be controlled then allow themselves the freedom of being happy.

  • RosePetal
    RosePetal

    Hi looloo My hubby has had O.C.D. since he was in his teens he was not a born in but being a JW certainly increased the stress and lead to depression through the years. The elders used to tell him it was lack of faith which made me so angry. I could see it had nothing to do with lack of faith what nonsense. This just put more pressure on us as a family. I suffered with clinical depression I was a born in and this was due to a build up of years of having horrible family problems growing up while being in the cult that expects so much of you and nothing is ever good enough. When I was going through some of my worst times and couldn't keep up so called brothers and sisters from our hall would cross over the street and ignore me. When I did get to meetings which was a struggle they would ignore me and just afew of the brothers and sisters who were struggling themselves would speak to me. Most of the elders and their wives treated me like I was a bit of dirt under their shoe. I have so many things to tell that make me angry I'll leave for onother time. I found that whenever my health improved i would go mad and overdo things try and pioneer and drive hubby mad going overboard just so they would speak to me. Through the years I saw others going through similar experiences. You are always told it is lack of faith and to get on the work more. I remember I was in my twenties during the time I had clinical depression I hadn't managed to go in the service for six months I was so poorly I couldn't eat very much and I was terrified inside of everything it is difficult to explain but going out or to the shop was a nightmare I didn't want to talk to poeple during this time no one came to see us. finaly and elder came round and coldly informed me I had not reported for six months and I was no longer classed as a member of the congregation. I tried to explain that I was poorly and could not cope he said you do not have enough faith you must get to meetings more and go on the service. It was like talking to a brick wall and I just thought where is all this love the org. is supposed to have I cannot see it. I used to cry till my heart broke. it took a while to eventualy get help from doctors and thats another story why.

  • looloo
    looloo

    lost everythingi was one of those needing to believe in something and i agree with you x rosepetal , my heart goes out to you , i remember a trip to the shops in a daze of depression when i thought "going back " was the answer , when in fact it was the cause , my non jw dad even said "oh no why do you always press self destruct ,dear" when i said i was going back ! i hope that heartless bastard elder has depression now !

  • RosePetal
    RosePetal

    looloo I am sorry to hear of what you went through especialy with your daughter thats terrible. It was actually reading stories like yours made me realise that there were others going through these things in the org. worldwide and that my experience pailed into nothing in comparison. I was shocked I read some on Yuku. I have sat here and cried over some of them. Your dad was encouraging you not to go back but born ins with JW parents put guilt on. No matter how awful it was and wether from my dad or the congregation my mum would say it is Jehovah your serving let yourself be wronged. They are just imperfect men. Thats why I stuck it out for so long. How are you now?

    have you finaly broken free in your mind? Does confedence get better? I would also ask this of anybody as my confidence is still very poor although I have impoved because I did go to college eventually.

  • Tristram
    Tristram

    Rose hit it on the head. The org probably doesn't cause mental illness, but exacerbates a bad situation by a encouraging a distrust of the mental health profession, entrusting a serious condition to men who have no qualifications to be dealing with such a matter, and a constant "do more, you are never doing enough" mantra that will increase guilt in anybody.

  • fokyc
    fokyc
    loolooo said: "...are people mentally ill because of that cult or does it attract the mentally ill..."

    BOTH! I became very depressed when attending the meetings,

    but others have joined who are either depressed or suffering serious mental problems.

    Attending the meetings will certainly depress the fittest and never improve the already ill person.

    It is a cult and has all the attributes of one. I could never go to another meeting or enter another KH.

    fokyc

  • looloo
    looloo

    rosepetal you have private message , i had doubts for a long time but what actually cured me was a elder declaring feelings for me , it was my "friends" dad and he was married and very strict and i was very shocked as i thought he liked me in a daughterly way ! anyway this elder had told the man who im now married to that he could never be with me and not to come back to meetings untill he was "over me" i realised it was very hypocritical of him and his elder advice had obviously not come from jehovah like i had been told , i was no longer scared of checking out the internet and did so and found a site like this , and the more i found out the better i got but will always regret getting involved for 7 years on and off and of course my daughter would not have been abused had i not met jehovahs happy people !

  • looloo
    looloo

    rosepetal you have private message , i had doubts for a long time but what actually cured me was a elder declaring feelings for me , it was my "friends" dad and he was married and very strict and i was very shocked as i thought he liked me in a daughterly way ! anyway this elder had told the man who im now married to that he could never be with me and not to come back to meetings untill he was "over me" i realised it was very hypocritical of him and his elder advice had obviously not come from jehovah like i had been told , i was no longer scared of checking out the internet and did so and found a site like this , and the more i found out the better i got but will always regret getting involved for 7 years on and off and of course my daughter would not have been abused had i not met jehovahs happy people !

  • babygirl30
    babygirl30

    Anything 'positive' (looking) is going to attract those who have major emotional/mental issues - it gives them HOPE and peace of mind! Think about it...all the immigrants that come to the U.S. come for the same reasons: better life, hope, more money, all GOOD things! (give me your tired, hungry, etc). Same thing with the org/cong...they are like MAGNETS to those with issues because it's a haven for them. People will be nice, they are told they won't be judged, they are offered a hope for free (along with clothing, life skills, food, whatever it takes to get them to get baptized), and they are sold the idea of everyone being sooooo happy!!!! My old cong was like the State Hospital - i swear. There were so many people with alcohol, drug, and mental issues that it was downright scarey at times to be cornered by one of those 'friends' and have them try to converse with you...UGH.

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