A well written objective statement Terry, I hope everyone has a chance to read it.
Food for thought for JW faders and JWS alike.
So where do you do the research?
by ConnieD29 22 Replies latest jw friends
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Cadellin
Connie, I've found that it helps to be very picky about the author's background and credentials. Generally, a scholar recognized as an authority in his/her field, who has published repeatedly in peer-reviewed, scholarly journals, is likely to be as helpful/reliable a source as any. Subjecting research to the scrutiny of peers helps minimize--though not eliminate--unfounded biases. As others have said, you can't get rid of them entirely.
This is where your own thinking skills come in, as well as the willingness to read from both ends of the spectrum, from those established scholars with a more secular, revisionist perspective as well as those who are conservative. You'll eventually come to your own conclusion, one that accords with your own world view. But it's not a quick or easy journey.
Try Richard Friedman--he's a solid scholar who lays out the evidence for his perspective clearly and methodically, though more toward the liberal/secular end of things. I also like Mark Smith for the socio-cultural history of Israel and the fascinating development of Israelite monotheism, though he's not especially easy to get through.
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ConnieD29
Thanks for all the input:) I will probably order the Karen Armstrong book. I do feel like I need to just step back and not rush anything. But at the same time I feel like I'm taking away part of my identity by taking away religion.
When I was with the JWs, I felt like their beliefs and doctrines were very cold compared to Christianity. Even though they had an answer to everything which was very convincing.
If I were honest I would have to say I like the feely part of Christianity and the idea of a relationship with Jesus, but can't understand why that part of it seems so hard for me to attain or to feel real to me. Is it lack of Faith? Where is the line between Faith and just blind stupidity? Wow, that seems alittle harsh...did I say that?
Thanks again for giving me the time of day;)
Connie
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Terry
I feel like I'm taking away part of my identity by taking away religion.
Stop and think.
Religion (especially christianity) tells you that you are worthless!
You aren't an individual; you are a sinner!
You are either a sheep or a goat.
You are a slave.
You possess no value and represent something which deserves to die!
Mainstream christinaity calls that being a "wretch".
Now really! How can a normal, healthy, post-enlightenment human being call all that A SENSE OF IDENTITY?
What needs to happen is that you actually gain a sense of SELF.
The only time religious people talk about SELF it is in terms of SELF-ish or SELF-less. There really is no room for SELF.
Life consists of becoming. You become who you really are. First, you must be allowed the room to decide things like personal tastes, values and goals. If all that has been disabled by religious indoctrinations---you have to start over like a little kid.
Do what a kid does. Try things out. Try things on. Ask a million stupid questions. Be skeptical/naive. Grow. Learn. Be open.
Then you will have a sense of IDENTITY because you will be identified by others for who YOU are and not for what club you've joined.
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AllTimeJeff
The problem with trying to discover who we are, is that as we discard the agendas of groups, we find little that we have actually thought through.
My only advice is, take your time. Whatever "answers" are out there won't come in a month, and if they are packaged that way, you should reject them quickly.
Education education education. If you aren't afraid to enter another persons frame of reference, you can learn something even from theists. Atheists as well. There is no need to judge, only to listen.
Take your time.
I am fond of saying that over time, the fortunate ones discover who they already are. I am not saying that my beliefs haven't changed drastically since I left JW's. Far from it. But at the core of me, I discover parts of me that were untouched by the GB indoctrination efforts.
My biggest value of all is honesty, esp intellectual honesty. I made a promise to myself not to lie to the person in the mirror ever again, or to lie to another person just to spare their feelings. If I might be so bold, I suggest that as a possible core anchor for anyone who is rebuilding their life and "belief" system after exiting JW's.
How can you tell if you are being honest with yourself or not? If you refuse to listen to someone you disagree with, and reject it without question, and without considering it, then you aren't there yet. (among other criteria....)
Lastly, may I suggest a strong dose of pragmatism? This quality helps me to not be too idealistic, and to read the world I inhabit a little more accurately then I used to as a JW.
Good luck!
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leavingwt
Religion (especially christianity) tells you that you are worthless!
Further, as I understand it, it teaches that you are also FILTHY and DISGUSTING in the eyes of God. (Once you accept Jesus, however, you're whiter than the driven snow.)
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ConnieD29
Dang you guys are smart....I'm going to have to look up some of those words.
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AWAKE&WATCHING
You guys ROCK!
Reading this has brought tears to my eyes. I was so lost and confused when I came here. You guys really helped me learn to think for myself.
I don't post nearly as much as I did in the early days but I still luv ya!
Connie - I definitely steered you wrong the first time with the JW's, but not this time. Aren't these folks awesome?
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HappyGuy
ConnieD29,
Why would you assume that you should base your beliefs about life, the universe, and everything on what the Bible says (even assuming that anyone could understand what it says)?
I think you would be better off to stay away from the bible if you are searching for the meaning of life. The answer to that question is not in there.
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daniel-p
You have to discover your own clues as you go along, eventually formulating a pattern that informs your own beliefs.