How can I explaine my wife SHE IS NOT a JW???

by Albert Einstein 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • Albert Einstein
    Albert Einstein

    My wife was raised in an ultra hardcore JW family, and together with me served faithfully for many years to Hojovah....

    Now, due to my apostate influence educational efforts she:

    • Went to a JW meeting only maybe 5 times in past year (just for the public talk)
    • Was not present at service meeting for almost 2 years
    • Missed most conventions
    • Doesnt object our son going to birthday parties
    • Doesnt object christmass decorations in our house
    • Packs christmass gifts in christmass wrapping paper
    • Read Crisis of consciene and basicly agrees with the book
    • Agrees, that most JW policies are unbiblical and false
    • Was not in house to house service for several years

    and so and so.... actually I do not find on her and her behaviour anything what makes normally a person a JW... but she still believes she is one!

    Its kind a schizophrenia for her, she doesnt know what her position is....

    Would you tell such person straght she actually is not a JW anymore? Could that push her guilt feelings and direct her back to borg? Or it could help her to understand that its over and she is out .....

    Did you have similar experience?


  • nelly136

    if it aint broke, dont mend it?

  • nugget

    It is a mental thing. If she was baptised then in her head she is a witness forever until such time as she is Df'd or Da'd.

    Ask her if she was filling in a form and was asked to enter her religion what would she put in the box now.

    If she says JW ask her which of the doctrines and beliefs that make them different from other christian faiths does she agree with?

    If she says none then she is a Christian possibly but is not a specific faith.

    If she identifies a couple of key doctrines you can then ask. If someone in the hall was to criticise any part of the JW doctrine would the elders consider they were in good standing? What is likely to happen to such a one?

    If someone is DF'd or DA'd are they a JW?

    No they are not. So if you do not believe everything then you are no longer a JW. After all Jesus said that thoughts equate to actions so failure to believe is enough to break the link with the old religon.

    Talk about the positives you have experienced not following JW doctrine and reinforce that you follow your own moral code without the need to be policed by men.

    Hope this helps.

  • Designer Stubble
    Designer Stubble

    You could be describing my situation. I would not be too worried, it is more of a social thing. I too am leaving it as such for now, not wanting to push her back in. At least you can rest assured that your children will never enter the cult and that the chain breaks here.

  • Albert Einstein
    Albert Einstein

    Thanks for your comments Nelly, Nugget,

    Designer - welcome on the board! Intresting you have similar situation...! When you talk of kids - the funny things is my wife is in fact not a real witness anymore, but she would like to get our kids to become JW!!! But as you say it will never happen...


  • AnnOMaly

    A Catholic may hardly attend mass, may often use contraception and may eat meat on Fridays, but she might still consider herself to be a Catholic.

    Mrs. Einstein sounds more like a lapsed JW.

    The crunch question is, does she believe JWs are somehow God's specially chosen organization?

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Leave it alone, it'll fall off when it's ripe

  • moshe

    Seems like she still feels a connection to the JW tribe and has found nothing to replace it with. Just think how many members the WT could claim, if they operated under the same rules as Judaism- it's membership for life. You might be a nonpracticing-unaffilated Jew, but you are still a Jew.

  • leavingwt

    She is captive to the concept that Watchtower is God's organization. Her level of participation and non-conformance to rules will not change this.

  • Heaven

    Just think how many members the WT could claim, if they operated under the same rules as Judaism

    Shhhh.... don't give them any ideas.

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