An atheist and a creationist are walking along a riverbank . . . .

by nicolaou 46 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • nicolaou

    Creationist: “Look at this! The course of this river has obviously been designed, it's avoiding every single tree on the riverbank!”

    Atheist: “That's not true, the river isn't avoiding anything”.

    Creationist: “But look at it! Can't you see? It's swerving to avoid every single plant!”

    Atheist: “This river was not designed, there is overwhelming evidence that it formed by natural processes and the plants are growing on the land that is available to them”.

    Creationist: “Are you trying to tell me that all those plants know where the riverbank is?

    Atheist: “No, I never said that the plants know anything, seeds will germinate when the conditions are right. The soil on the riverbank is nutrient rich and has a good amount of moisture in it”.

    Creationist: (smiling to himself) “So, who planted the seeds on the riverbank for them to germinate in the first place? Did they plant themselves there did they?”

    Atheist: “No, the seeds are dispersed naturally by wind and animals etc”.

    Creationist: “That's impossible! What are the chances of all these plants coming to the riverbank by accident? The probability is just too low”.

    Atheist: “Actually the probability is so high that it happens all the time. It is to be expected”.

    Creationist: “You are very foolish, why don't you give credit to the one who designed this river?”

    Atheist: “No one designed the river! Why do you keep saying that when all the evidence is against you?”

    Creationist: (pulls out a book) “Look, it says so right here! First he planted the trees, then he made the river, can you see how he was careful not to disturb the plants?”

    Atheist: “This guy sounds hilarious, can I talk to him?”

    Creationist: (smiling excitedly) “Of course you can! He loves it when people talk to him”.

    Atheist: “Cool, what's his number?”

    Creationist: “Don't be silly, he doesn't have a phone!”.

    Atheist: “Then let's visit him, where does he live?”

    Creationist: “Don't be stupid! You can't visit him, he's not in the universe”.

    Atheist: “But you said I can talk to him”.

    Creationist: “You can! You can talk to him in your mind and he will hear you”.

    Atheist: (laughing) “You should stay away from the lsd buddy”.

    Creationist: (frowning) “You know, he said there would be people like you, I really hope that someday you will come to believe in him”.

    Atheist: ”Why? What's the big deal?”

    Creationist: “It is a very important matter, your life depends on it. He's going to kill all the people who don't believe in him”.

    Atheist: “What about my children?”

    Creationist: “Bird food”.

    Atheist: “This guy sounds like an evil dictator, is he related to Robert Mugabe?”.

    Creationist: “The designer isn't evil! He's the most loving guy ever! If you believe in him he will give you 1 billion dollars!!!

    Atheist: “Sounds like bribery to me”.

    Creationist: “It's not bribery, it's his loving kindness!”

    Atheist: “So is that why you can't afford to pay your rent and fix your car?”

    Creationist: “No silly, he's going to give it to me after he kills you, then I can have my pet polar bear”.

    Atheist: “You really need to cut back on the lsd man, it messes with your mind”.

    The End

    Not my own work . . .

  • Albert Einstein
    Albert Einstein

    Well 1 billion + pet polar bear... Hmmmm that sounds good...

    Can you give me an adress of the guy????


  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    Good one, Nic.

    Atheist: "So, if everything is designed and created, who created the 'Creator'?"

    Creationist: "Shut Up! The Creator gets angry and starts killing people if we ask such questions!"

  • AllTimeJeff
  • mkr32208

    It's all so simple!

  • Elsewhere

    Ohhhhh! Now I get it!

    Silly me... I just never understood the LOGIC of gawd!

  • Psychotic Parrot
    Psychotic Parrot

    Everytime i fill a cup with water, & i see that the water fits the cup perfectly, i thank the creator for designing the water so that it would fit that particular cup.

  • Deputy Dog
    Deputy Dog


    This only works if your creationist is a JW. The Christians that I know would never reason this way.

    Atheist: “This river was not designed, there is overwhelming evidence that it formed by natural processes and the plants are growing on the land that is available to them”.

    I'd ask the athiest, who designed the "natural processes"?

  • Psychotic Parrot
    Psychotic Parrot

    Why do natural processes need designing?

  • hamilcarr

    who designed the "natural processes"?

    What has been designed: process or product?

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