Posted on Freeminds - your help pls

by besty 25 Replies latest jw experiences

  • besty
    besty

    "My wife just left me yesterday and took my 2 girls. She's hold up in the presiding overseers (big beautiful) custom built french country house. I know my 14 yr is probably freeking out and my sweet little 9 year old, I know, loves her Daddy. I hope she's thinking about me. I've been up for 48 hours doing almost non-stop research on the internet and praying constantly. I feel so alone but I know that my specific prayers are being specifically answered. It's like a miracle for me discovering the many truths behind the curtain after 20 years and that's a start. I guess I just need someone to talk to. All my friends are witnesses, right? I'm thinking how can reclaim my wife (of 25 years) and my children. One thing I can say for sure, I already feel a sense of freedom but in no way do I underestimate the seriousness of what I'm facing. I think I need to hire an attorney tomorrow, well, today. My wife will not speak with me so I was thinking that my first priority is to get legal custody of my children...HELP!"

    PM me for email address or just post your thoughts below.

    thanks

    paul

  • quietlyleaving
    quietlyleaving

    how sad. Wish I could help in some way.

    I wonder if this father has thought of some sort of external (to JWS) family mediation service?

  • etna
    etna

    You poor thing Paul. Hang in there and the most important thing is your kids. My ex took my kids to another state under false pretense and a friend told me to keep a journal. It was the best thing I ever did. That was 4 years ago. Get a journal and start writng, it not only makes you feel better but it also helps you remember stuff in a few years an d you can show your kids later when they ask why. Just keep fighting for your kids, they are the most important things in the world.

    Good luck and keep us posted, Etna

  • asilentone
    asilentone

    etna, I do not think Paul wrote that story, he just copied it here.

  • dozy
    dozy

    Trying to look objectively & positively , at least the guy hasn't been kicked out of his own home. Has he been behaving unreasonably , so as to pre-empt this action or is it just that his wife has become aware that he has concerns about the WTBTS & doesn't want to live with an apostate?

    I would be minded not to initiate attorneys at this stage - their motive is to drag out family break-ups like this to create as much of a bill as possible. Are there family or relationship counselling services where he is? Try to chill it out - sooner or later the wife & kids will want to go back home.

    Bit of a mess , but could be a hell of a lot worse - the guy could be living in a cardboard box somewhere. And what on earth is the PO doing letting this sister stay with him - the other elders & the CO should have something to say about that.

  • quietlyleaving
    quietlyleaving

    yes I think he should get in touch with the CO. A JW recently had a long discussion with the legal desk in a different country and was assured that CO's can help in a more open way than in the past and in a way that suits individual circumstances. Definitely worth a try for the sake of his family.

  • Narkissos
    Narkissos

    Seems odd he doesn't even try to explain why or how his wife left. Also, I'm not sure what "custom built french country house" means. Is that a type of house or does he live in France?

  • besty
    besty

    bttt

  • JWoods
    JWoods

    Roswell, New Mexico.

  • undercover
    undercover

    1) Get an attorney. He has a right to visit his children. If she refuses him that right...and the PO/COBOE is assisting in keeping them from him there could be legal charges.

    2) Probably forget about reconciliation with the wife. If she's left, took the kids and refuses to speak to him, it's time to accept that the new freedom from the cult may cost him his indoctrinated wife. If he can't save her and she can't accept his leaving the JWs, it's time to move on. Focus on saving the kids from the cult.

    3) Good luck to him. When he's settled down a little encourage him to come here and seek support from those who understand and have been there before him.

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