No big news . . . I heard it has something to do with swine flu. Like someone has to tell a JW to wash their hands frequently, and stay home with a fever. Sorry, I guess they do.\
Bhahahahaha!! What's wrong, Jehober isn't going to protect ya?
Letter being read tonight?
by mjarka911 27 Replies latest jw friends
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WTWizard
I hope it is the flu warning--giving official permission to blow off a boasting session if you think you have the swine flu.
Now, from what I have heard, swine flu is usually quite wimpy. If you have a slight headache from not enough sleep or too much stress, or are just feeling tired (or don't feel like going), just tell them you think you may be coming down with swine flu and stay home. When you have to go to work, the "swine flu" turns out to be another false alarm--after you have already missed the boasting session. Hopefully, this will make it easier for people to find an excuse to blow off boasting sessions until a pattern is established to miss them.
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The Almighty Homer
The letter is from headquarters in Brooklyn New York
Dears brothers around the world , we the GB feel it is the appropriate time to tell the truth about the
WTS. . The WTS. and all the preceding past GB members and past presidents have actually not been telling the truth about
are proclamation that were living in the last days and that Jesus has returned invisibly.
These were proclamations made in support of creating better circulation for are literature, which as a result was to bring money into the WTS.
We are truly sorry for any trouble this has caused any of are brotherhood of JWS.
We are hoping that you accept are apologies for are actions in this regard and we ask form your forgiveness, but
please take into account that we are a publishing corporation and that we sustain are selfs on the money that the WTS creates.
With best regards the Governing Body of JWS .
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AK - Jeff
They are going to announce 'cliff notes' version of the 'kool aid' version of the Watchtower. It will be pocket sized, so that you can carry it with you wherever you go, consult it often throughout the month so that memorization of the latest 'new light' is completed within the time allowed before the next issue arrives. Kind of a 'flash card' style of learning new light. They will be issued in multiple colors, a new color each month for variety. The 'flash card' style goes further: they will be produced with 'flash paper', so that when persecution begins, you will be able to just light a match and it will disappear. No more messy chewing and swallowing the evidence. [Side note here for closet Jw smokers - this will prove invaluable in your constant quest to justify carrying a lighter or matches. And if you are caught lighting up in the KH parking lot, you can quickly pull your flashcard, ignite it, and claim you thought persecutors were coming after you.]
They will be called 'Flashpaper Flashcards for Monthly New Light Flashings'.
Jeff
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sir82
There was a letter about staying home if you get sick from swine flu. Something that most 5 year olds have figured out, but JWs aren't allowed to do anything unless "mama" tells them it is OK.
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isaacaustin
AlltimeJeff, check your pm
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LouBelle
Shame, they are trying to stir up some excitement for the meetings, ag tog.
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DJK
It might be an attendence report for this years district convention's followed by a financial report for the same.
And then some heart wrenching story that comes out of the tsunami and earthquake zone's around the world.