Just throwing some thoughts out there. Wondering if anyone feels the same as I do. You know, being brought up not being allowed to date until you were 'of marrying age'. Not being allowed to look at the opposite sex. Not knowing how to act around the opposite sex because you were taught it was wrong to be with them unless you were getting married. If caught talking to the opposite sex, everyone assumed you were dating, and from that point on even though only friends, you werent allowed to be seen together.
I look back on how I was brought up and my parents were overly strict. I remember one time writing on my school diary 'I love.....' and my parents hauling me out of bed and yelling and screaming at me :( I was 13. My best friend at the time, a witness, had written the same thing. I wanted to be like her, to have that freedom of expression. Her parents let her think about boys etc. They joked around about it with her. Mine were opposite. I wasnt allowed to look at boys, or say they were good looking or anything.
My friend was married by 18. I hear she's still happily married 11yrs later. Me, well I never knew how to act around boys. I married at 24, rather late in the 'witness scheme of things'. Until then I had to put up with the 'why arent you married' and 'whats wrong with you' or 'you do like men dont you?' type questions. Also the 'you better find a boyfriend soon or you'll be past your used by date'.
Only the other day I said to my mum that I think the witness way of not letting younger ones date can actually hinder them when they do want to get married. If only young ones were allowed to get to know the opposite sex, hang out with them, do the typical teenage 'dating' thing, without thinking that it HAS to lead to marriage. The whole witness ideal of dating only to marry annoys me. Its such pressure.
My parents wouldnt even let me hold my then fiances hand. We werent allowed to sit next to each other at meetings. My dad would say 'theres plenty of time for that once you're married'. In hindsight, I barely knew the man....and what followed was a rocky few years after that. Not all witness marriages end up like mine (divorce), but I do see alot of unhappy young married ones.
Whats your experience? View? Thoughts?