can they df me again?

by Cordelia 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • Cordelia

    him guys im back again! bit worried i havent been meetings at my hall for 10 months i went sometimes with my dad to his (to please him) tho he knows i dont want anything to do with the 'truth'

    anyway i got bit drunk on weds and did something stupid and my brother (a very into it dub) caught me and reported me to the elders! now im just waiting to see if they will contact me, i told my dad i would tell them to go away if they came as i havent been for ages but he says i shouldnt say that as they may dissassiocte me,

    i know u may all say so what but anyone that knows me knows that i have been confused now for ages, and finally i thought i was in a good place where 3 men dont come round and decide if i lose my family again or not, my dad is sooo upset he knows ill never go back and he is hurt but im dealing with that but how the hell can i be threatened with dfing when im not even a witness?

  • asilentone

    maybe you can try to threat them with lawsuit if they df'd you again, Flipper here on this board was df'd once and he was reinstated, they were going to df'd him again, he threated them with lawsuit, they backed off, Good Luck! Sorry that you have to go thru this.

  • jeanniebeanz

    Don't meet with them. Who do they think they are, anyhow? They have no real control over your life and liberty unless you hand it to them. If they pursue, deny it and tell them it is none of their business anyhow. Then, I'd avoid my 'brother' like the plague.

    My .02


  • Cordelia

    thanks its my own fault and the thing i did invovled a brother which was very stupid of me!

    thing is my family know and are very ashamed but what made me laugh (well not laugh) was my mum has told me that even if im not a witness but i ever have a bf sleep with anyone swear etc she doesnt want anything to do with me anyway...basically i have to live like a witness even if im not one!!

  • purplesofa

    Good grief,

    They sure don't waste anytime in meeting with you, happened the same way with me,

    was so raw emotionally with FEAR FEAR FEAR and then they pounce before you can get your thoughts together

    If you feel you must meet with them........STALL, postpone, STALL some more, get a continuance.

    What a threat to society you are!!!!

  • jeanniebeanz

    basically i have to live like a witness even if im not one!!

    I don't know your situation, Cordelia. But the statement above is why I knew that, eventually, if I wanted to be able to live my own life and raise my children in the 'real' world, I was going to have to let them all go.

    It almost killed me. I isolated myself, drank too much, and became bitter and angry for a while. You know what, tho? The storm clouds passed and the bitterness faded and now, I have my own life on my own terms.

    It was worth everything. Freedom comes at a price. Some are willing to pay it, some are not.


  • digderidoo

    Don't meet with them, they need two witnesses to df you, if only your brother witnessed the sin misdemenour you should have nothing to worry about. If you meet with them however and deny it, then they may call your brother in to challenge you. Point is, DO NOT MEET WITH THEM!!!

  • Cordelia

    i wont i have told my family im not answering any doors or any phones... my ex hubby had left just 4 months when he took our little girl on hol with his girlfriend they couldnt contact him and just left it so thats what im hoping for but it doesnt change the fact that my poor dad is worried sick ill be dfed and i have hurt them again and all they can say is go back to meetings and everything will be alright... why cant they just understand i want nothing to do with the so called 'truth!'

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    Sorry about all of this that you are going through. How old are you and who do you live with, if I may ask? If you are under their rules, I wonder if it is reasonable to try to control someone's behavior outside of the parents' home if you are of age. In their home, you would be bound by house rules but rules for an adult living there, not rules for a child.

  • shamus100


    they can DF you. Yes, if you don't meet with them they will DF or DA you. If you want to be a dubbie for your families sake, get you're "I'm sorry" face on asap, you'll start going to meetings, yada yada yada.

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