My Copy of 'I'm Perfect, You're Doomed' Arrived Today...

by brinjen 24 Replies latest jw friends

  • MissingLink
    MissingLink

    I'm just listening to an interview with Kyria now.

    http://psychjourney_blogs.typepad.com/psychjourney_podcasts/2009/08/im-perfect-youre-doomed-tales-from-a-jehovahs-witness-upbringing.html

    There is a small yellow "play" button near the top of the page (not very obvious).

  • brinjen
    brinjen

    Well, I've finished the book (and listened to the interview, thanks for the link MissingLink) and all I can say is "wow". The book takes a pretty dark turn around half way through. Kyria describes herself at this stage in the interview as quite pretentious... once she got an idea into her head, no one could talk her out of it and that's pretty evident in the book.

    I get the idea there's a few here who'd like to think everyone exits the JW's a happy, well adjusted person who leaves because of their doctrines. The reality is, that's usually not the case, especially with born ins. A lifetime of being told you're a worthless sinner who, thanks to having knowledge of the twoof is going to receive undeserved kindness and be spared a fiery, eternal death kinda takes it's toll on most. One of the parts that struck me the most was where she said she couldn't distinguish the differences between different sins... it's a sin to celebrate your birthday, commit adultery etc and I have to say I felt the same myself... when you've spent a lifetime having pretty much everything demonised, it screws up your own values system that might have actually been normal had you been permitted to develop one on your own. I've said it before, most born ins seem to leave still believing in it all, I did and it appears Kyria did as well.

    From the interviews I've read and heard with her, and from the book itself I get the feeling she wrote this first and foremost for fellow ex born ins. The feedback she has said she's received has been largely along the lines of 'I thought I was the only one' and again, that would be me too. We've all done things we're not proud of, when I first left I was a 24 year old with the mental maturity of a 12 year old. I thought sleeping with someone meant you were in a relationship and that all worldly people were worried about was sex, booze and partying. I think that's where a lot of the stereotypes about ex members come from, that's what worldly people do and when you leave, you're worldly, I definitely thought that way. But hey, we picked ourselves up and gradually turned our lives around coming out of it all for the better, I think the fact that she was able to put her experiences on paper in the manner that she did shows that... none of her flaws were sugar coated and I respect that.

    Definitely recommend it.

  • Tuesday
    Tuesday
    I get the idea there's a few here who'd like to think everyone exits the JW's a happy, well adjusted person who leaves because of their doctrines.

    That's really not the idea I'm trying to get across, I would like JWs to know that people like this DO exist. Right now if you ask any JW why a born-in leaves what's the first thing they say, then what's the next, then what's the next and finally the fourth reason?

    1.) Had promiscuous sex with a worldly person

    2.) Wanted to drink to excess

    3.) Wanted to do drugs

    4.) They never really were Witnesses to begin with, they were probably sinning the whole time.

    And again Kyria met up with a random person from the internet to have sex with them. She mentions how much she drank when she left. She mentions that she started smoking up everyday after she left. Finally the whole time she was a witness she mentions having a problem with masturbation. Every stereotype confirmed. I'm not saying I want those stereotypes wiped out, but I wouldn't mind if you asked for a fifth option the JWs will say "Well he didn't agree with the teachings and felt he needed to leave." I don't care if they think the person is wrong, gloriously diluted or whatever, as long as they can recognize that people can and do leave because they don't agree with the doctrine and born-ins are no different.

    But regardless there you go people, out of the posts on this thread and another thread it's about 15:4 saying that it's a good book. I would say that gets pretty high marks.

  • brinjen
    brinjen

    But according to JW's, everyone who has left has commited the ultimate sin... turning their back on Jehovah's Organisation (excuse me ). Whether you're celebrating birthdays, giving Christmas gifts having pre-marital sex or just no longer attending the meetings and field misery you're sinning in their eyes anyway. As for leaving for those reasons.. I'd say it would be more about wanting to live a normal life... one where you don't feel suffocated from being watched at every turn (and I think that's something we all can relate to in one form or another).

    But the book isn't about why born ins leave, it's about Kyria's experience as one... nothing more.

  • Tuesday
    Tuesday
    But the book isn't about why born ins leave, it's about Kyria's experience as one... nothing more.

    Unfortunately a side-effect of writing anything regarding a religion, a group or especially a destructive cult like the Jehovah's Witnesses it becomes more than just an auto-biography. Anyone who thinks differently is just fooling themselves. Look at Crisis of Conscience, that's essentially an auto-biography but look at what it has become. It became the most fearsome book in JW history, because he didn't do anything wrong. Most would even call his disfellowshipping a bogus reason.

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