Any DF'd or DA'd people ever get visits from Elders?

by drew sagan 20 Replies latest jw friends

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  drew sagan

  Just saw the thread from OTWO talking about the call he got from an Elder who wanted to meet up. It go me thinking about my own situation. Me and my wife have been gone for a while. We both started missing meetings back in 2006, and completely stopped in 2007. I eventually DA'd and she was DF'd around the middle of 2007.

  After we had our baby last September (2008) my wife got a call from an Elder inquiring about stopping by for a visit. She told him she wasn't interested but he could call on the phone if he wanted to. That was the last time we ever heard from them.

  So in the past two years we were contacted once on the telephone.

  I'm wondering how other DF'd or DA'd people have been treated. Is an effort made to contact you, or are you off the radar?
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  leavingwt

  Haven't heard a peep. DA'd in April 2008. Wife inactive since the same. Hasn't heard a peep.
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  jamiebowers

  I had been df'd for at least 8 years and living here in Ohio where I'd never been a jw when the elders paid me a visit. They asked for me by name. They asked me if I was interested in returning to Jehovah, and I politely but firmly told them no. I haven't heard from anybody since then, and that's been at least 13 or 14 years ago. I have no idea what prompted the visit or how they knew where I was living at the time. My jw family didn't even live in the same state.
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  Finally-Free

  I DA'd in 2003. They've made no attempts to contact me. I never donated any money as a JW, so it's understandable.

  W
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  troubled mind

  We stopped attending in 2006. A few weeks before the memorial that year we had an Elder stop by as a 'Friend' . He was very nervous as he spoke I think he was afraid we were going to really dump something bad onto him . We were very friendly to him and when he asked if there was something we "Needed " to tell him or anything we wanted to discuss . I just said 'No not really , we know where you are if we do ". He invited us to the Memorial which we agreed to attend . That was it until about a yr later when he and his wife stopped by in service and gave us a news clipping they had found while moving about our family and just stopped by to give it to us . Before they left they said how much they missed us at the meetings ,I thanked them said yeah I miss you too , bye .

  That has been it ,never has an Elder asked "So why have you guys stopped going to the hall " . Instead I know they have listened to gossip from extended family on why THEY think we left . Which is funny because we have Never told any of them any of our personal reasons .

  One new brother did ask me "why did you quit was it because your youngest son has become rebellious and has joined a worldy rock band ?" I kind of went off on him and told him absolutely our leaving had nothing to do with my son and that in fact i was extremely proud of him . Unlike many of his witness friends he has been drug and alcohol free and doesn't sleep around like the witness kids do behind their parents backs . " I told him the reason I had quit was because I was not happy, and I had figured out the reason was because we continually are told we are not good enough as JW's. This kind of pressure was not mentally or emotionally healthy so for my own well being i had to quit attending . He was taken aback and then asked in a snide way "So ARE you happy NOW ?" and i answered back " VERY much so !"

  As far as I know they haven't DF'd or DA'd us yet .....but almost everyone ignores us now .
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  cognizant dissident

  3.5 years and still awaiting my first visit. I stopped holding my breath a few years ago.

  I feel so unloved!
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  passwordprotected

  I'm pretty sure they won't bother with you if you're DAd. If you were DFd and are known to still be practicing the same sin, they may not bother with you. But I think a lot will depend on current "truth" contained in policy letters given to the elders or on how much of a focus the CO puts on it when he visits.
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  I quit!

  My experience was kind of like Jamiebowers. I have mentioned it before on this forum but here it is again. When I left I sent a letter of resignation that left no down about how I felt about the Watchtower. I pointed out their faults and threatened to sue them if the caused me any trouble. About ten years after I left my wife told me the elders wanted to talk to me. I had no idea why but agreed because I was curious. When I met with them they seemed to be offering me an opportunity to come back with no questions asked. I didn't know either one of the elders that came to visit me but I guess they were from my wife's hall. The elder that did all the talking was a middle aged white guy and seem a little nervous. The other elder was a young black "brother" who hardly said anything but kept staring at me. I could see him out of the corner of my eye just staring at me like he expected my head to start spinning around. It was pretty bizarre. Any way I declined their offer and haven't heard from them again. I seem to remember Barbara G. Harrison mentioning in her book "Visions of Glory" an experience were they called on her she had been away from it for years. I guess they never give up trying to ruin your life.
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  The-Borg

  We are inactive for over 2 years now. Not a phone call, a visit, nothing.
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  KAYTEE

  My wife and I have been out for about 6 years, not one elder has called (I thought they had a policy of calling every year? ) most probably too far gone!!!.

  I’m dying for them to call, I have amassed a three volume folder, just waiting for them to call.

  KT