Confusion on what to believe, also guilt.

by izzysma 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • is there help out there
    is there help out there

    Over a year ago I was involed with a JW who becouse of a board asked for my help leaving the truth. It is a long story and I will not get into it.

    It took me over six nonths to convince her to go to a church as the WT had convinced her that saton was inside. Sitting besides me in the begining of

    the service she was litterly shanking and by the end she had carmed realizing this was truly God house. On the way out the Paster said to her, Mary

    God always loved you, But today he has some spical love for you. This is what she always wanted to know, that God loved her for herself, not for the

    number meeting she went to or the number of service hour she put in. She broke down crying in the car.

    The bottem line is Being a JW you never know if you were worthy of Gods love. So what ever path you chose to take at this point, althow it may not

    ease it will all work out in the end becouse you know know that God truly loves you.

  • jamiebowers

    Welcome, izzysma! And honey, rest assured that most of us have been where you are now. Reading Ray Franz's Crisis of Conscience will help you to see that the Watchtower isn't the true religion that it claims to be. When you're ready, I would suggest also reading Combatting Cult Mind Control by Steven Hassan, where you wil learn that you were raised in a cult, not a religion. Your refusal to become a jw isn't evidence of evil but of good insight.

    Also please consider the dangers of having your child associate with a cult that insists on devotion to the death, (the blood issue). The fact that the organization turns a blind eye to child molestation should be another one of your concerns, IMHO, (see Keep reading and posting, and you'll be fine.

  • Chalam

    Hi Izzy and welcome aboard!

    Why stay loyal to a religion?! Much better to keep loyalty with God Almighty. He is far less concerned with the rules and institutions of men and far more concerned about you getting to know Him personally.

    If you are serious about finding the God of the bible then get a new one and read it by yourself.

    Here's one for free :)

    This is a great place to start Book of John

    Just keep these in mind...

    John 14:6 (New International Version)

    6 Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

    John 10:7-9 (New International Version)

    7 Therefore Jesus said again, "I tell you the truth, I am the gate for the sheep. 8 All who ever came before me were thieves and robbers, but the sheep did not listen to them. 9 I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved. He will come in and go out, and find pasture.



  • startingovernow

    Don't know how old your child is, but first things first, take care of you - as said above CoC and CCMC are the two books that will help you to see why exactly it was never the truth, and you have nothing to be guilty about. As far as raising your child in a religion - there is no rule that says you have to, but you do have the responsibility to teach them how to think and reason. The book, "Parenting Beyond Belief" may be of help to you in teaching morals without a specific religion. As far as religion goes, it is important to expose children to what people believe, just make sure you make it clear that no one really knows for sure about God, death, heaven, etc., no matter how much they say they do. There are lots of children's books that explain religion, God, the Bible, evolution, and how to think -even though these are written with children in mind, they can be helpful to adults like us her were never exposed to such information ourselves when young.

  • Brother Apostate
    Brother Apostate

    Forget "Religion", the organized, man-made misuse of God's Word the Bible.

    Instead, Pray to God in sincerety to show you the way by His Holy Spirit.

    Then, make it your habit to, after praying, read the Bible and ponder deeply what you read.

    Put into practice what you learn, continuously.

    Share with others what you have learned, primarily by deeds, secondarily by words.

    Then your gulit will be absolved by His sacrifice, and your confusion cleared by His enlightenment.



  • Mrs. Fiorini
    Mrs. Fiorini

    Welcome to the board. I hope you find your stay here beneficial.

    Regarding your question, ask yourself who benefits from the idea the all religions besides JWs are evil, and that anyone that looks into them is commiting an unforgivable sin. The Watchtower is a real pro at dissing their competition. That position comes from one of insecurity, in my opinion. But that's just my view. You can try a few churches yourself and draw your own conclusions.

    The WT has constructed a mental prison for you with that doctrine. You have a right to be free. And if you do decide to go back to the WT, it will be your choice, not theirs. Isn't that what Jehovah would want for you? Why would He want followers who believe because they have a gun to their head and are afraid of thinking for themselves? Is that the kind of followers you would want if you were God? Don't all parties involved deserve better than that?

    Best wishes to you on what ever decision you make.

  • AllTimeJeff

    Hi there. Sorry for the emotional angst you are going through. It is certainly something that anyone who has ever been in or around the cult can relate to....

    I was raised a witness up until I was 16, never was baptized, and now that I have my own child now I am having a REALLY hard time with wanting her to know what religion is.

    I have thought about this, based on my own experiences. Why not just start by taking your child on the internet or to churches and showing them what various denominations claim and believe? Education is the antidote to superstition. Be there to filter out any wild claims that religions tend to make...

    I'm really feeling alot of confusion and guilt cause I just don't know what to believe.

    And I hope that your confusion clears up as well. Might I suggest researching not only the religions, but their sources as well? If education is good for your children, it certainly is good for you as well.

    Guilt is one of the things that happens most often, and I wish it could be done away with. I wouldn't presume to know the particular triggers for your guilt in your case, but in general, many who examine their faith with a critical eye feel this way simply because they have been told that to do so is wrong. That a lack of "faith" is wrong.

    What is wrong is an effort to control you through guilt so you can examine the claims and see whether or not they are so. The results of your research may produce other emotions, but it is doubtful guilt will be among them.

    I am scared to learn another religion just because I was brought up that if you did that, thats the ultimate sin that is unforgivable.

    I understand this, as this is how it was put to me too. This idea is simply to control you. The GB knows that they can't follow you everywhere, so like the ancient trible of Afrca who had to appease "the gods" or fear divine retribution (through naturally occuring weather cycles) you have been asked to appease the WT god through not investigating for yourself their claims. They are taking advantage of fear. It has worked with you so far.

    Of course, not one of the things the WT has said has come true. That is precisely why they don't want you to learn what other religions (or for that matter, what atheists/agnostics/spiritualists) have to say.

    Ultimately, you are in charge of you. That is another thing that religion doesn't like, but happily, that does approximate the truth. You can either make the decision to act and know these things yourself, or make the decision to accept another form of religion that you don't choose to research. But that decision will always be within your power to make.

    I wish you much peace on your journey.

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