Two Posers For You

by Farkel 37 Replies latest jw friends

  • Farkel

    Here are two ethical posers:

    I. Would you rather your children grow up to be successful or happy? Explain your answer.

    II. If you knew your child could cheat on a test and in doing so, get admitted to a prestigious University which would advance the child much further in life, would you prefer the child to:

    1) Cheat, get the education and be much further ahead in life, or

    2) Not cheat, get a far lesser education and miss out on the opportunities which would be available in choice #1.

    Explain your answer.

    These were generationally directed questions, and you might be surprised at the divergence in answers from parents who are only separated by two generations.

    What say you?


  • yknot

    Question 1: Happy, because they would probably see themselves as successful and who is to say their happy outlook won't garner them success. Whilst success never guarantees happiness.

    Question 2: Not cheat. Why: Failure can be character building and I prefer promoting honesty over dishonesty for integrity sake, I also think it makes a better world/society. Besides they could just as easily strive to be accepted to the prestigious University higher levels of education beyond their bachelors and unlike the cheating scenario be truly appreciative of their accomplishments. Perhaps this failure could force them to think outside of the box and create opportunities.

    When my children (4 & 9) 'fail' and are frustrated they already know I am going to ask them why we have WD40 instead of WD39? Failure is part of life and unavoidable, better to learn from the experience then trying to live life avoiding failure at all costs. Additionally failure makes us appreciate forgivness of ourselves and others.

    Happiness, oh geez like being a born JW didn't teach me a thing about the hamsterwheel of striving for success! I think success is only possible as a whole when a person is balanced.... and of course being balanced tends to cause happiness.

    ..... BTW this is reflective of my parents views (or at least those they heaped on me).... but I think my Dad would cheat and justify his actions because he is highly competitive in his personal life.....his values bestowed on me don't alway match his actions......

  • bluecanary

    I. How are we defining "successful"? I would say that if my kid is happy in whatever they're doing, they ARE successful.

    II. I would rather my kid (or anyone) have the most opportunity for personal growth possible than to be subject to any arbitrary system. Who came up for the criteria of whether my kid could advance? Why should that entity have the power to decide how much knowledge a person has access to? This is assuming that not cheating would prevent the kid from further education altogether. Since the question implies that they would still have oportunities at other learning institutions, I say the kid should sink or swim on his own merit.

    In other words, education is a right that should never be denied. But as long as there is general access to it, the individual educators have the right to set standards for whom is accepted to their institution.

    Thanks, I like questions that make me think.

  • JeffT

    1 If my kid is not happy, he/she is not successful. They are not mutually exclusive in less you make them that way.

    2 Don't cheat. If you can't get into the big wig university honestly, you don't belong there. Its a set up to fail. There's a lot more to "educaton" than what you learn a school.

  • Farkel

    I'll clarify the criteria a little more for you.

    Think of however most of society defines "successful." Whatever that is in your mind, your child won't be able to have it if you chose that you child should be happy instead.

    On the second question, if your child does not cheat to get into that exclusive University, your child can never achieve the benefits that would have been otherwise available had your child cheated.

    These are either/or questions for the purposes of discussion. Obviously, these questions are designed to get people to think about what is most important in life for them. And for their children.


  • yknot

    But life is rarely about absolutes 'either/or'?.......

    And who then if that was the case am I to chose that decision for them.....since they would be adults?

    I guess your question forces me to declare that I think freedom of choice is important to me.

  • Farkel

    :But life is rarely about absolutes 'either/or'?.......

    No. But my topic is.

    :And who then if that was the case am I to chose that decision for them.....since they would be adults?

    Yes. Those are the rules in this thread.

    :I guess your question forces me to declare that I think freedom of choice is important to me.

    Then you don't belong in this hypothetical topic about ethics, do you? So run along now.


  • Rocky_Girl

    1. Happy

    2. Honest

  • aSphereisnotaCircle

    1. happy

    2. cheat........ maybe. If by cheating she would be able to reach a leval of success she would not have otherwise, then obviously she has the ability to reach that level. It's just some arbitrary test that stands in her way, so why shouldnt she? If the test was a true measure of worthyness, then she would not be successful even if she did cheat.

    On the other hand, if shes happy, it doesn't matter, she allready is successful.

  • yknot

    I would prefer them to be Happy and Honest under your terms.

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