by BonaFide 31 Replies latest jw friends

  • BonaFide

    I respect those that have made up their mind, and left JW's and started a new life. I have thought long and hard about this, and read hundreds of your posts.

    For now, I am going to stay in, and try to little by little help my family and friends get out. This could be a complete wimp-out, spineless move on my part, or it could be that I have the guts and the tenacity to really help people to get free while I am still in. I am not sure yet which one of those I am. Probably the former.

    But for the present anyway, I think those of us that are undercover should EMBRACE THE HYPOCRISY.

    I mean really people, those of us that are still commenting, going in service, what are we doing? ARE WE OUT OF OUR MINDS? WE KNOW ITS A LIE AND YET WE ARE COMMENTING AT THE MEETINGS AND GOING IN SERVICE! WHAT?

    I actually have some bad days where I think about how I no longer have the paradise to look forward to. (My previous topic).

    But other times it's actually kind of fun to comment at the meetings, go out in service, and spout out "The Faithful and Discreet Slave knows what we need" and , "The Governing Body is really being used by Jehovah in this time of the end." "We must follow the celestial chariot no matter where it leads us." As I sit there at the Kingdom Hall and comment, or I sit at a JW gathering and tell a missionary experience, I just can't believe I am sitting there, and doing that. But it all has a purpose, at least I hope this will work. I listen, and I wait for the opportunity, and then I ask a question or two. Then after a while, I drop it. Questions are what stayed in my mind, and got me to really think, I hope it will work on them.


    I even asked the host questions about how he embraced the truth, and I asked the other Russian brother stuff too. I was asked to tell a few experiences about my missionary assignment, I got into it. I want to stay in that circle so that I can slowly get some to wake up out of their cognitive dissonance. But that means I still need to pretend...... So what do I have, "Cognitive Dissonant-Dissonance?"

    So, to all of you that are STILL IN AND PRETENDING, embrace the hypocrisy , people!


  • Mickey mouse
    Mickey mouse

    Personally, I cannot in good conscience make comments related to the Governing body. I cannot go in field service. All I am is a bum on the seat and I can live with that much for now. My very occasional comments are either bible related or to make an aposta-point.

  • blondie

    At least you have here to come to, Bonafide, and say what you want and know that you are not alone in your feelings.

    The first time I shifted into "inactivity" it was very lonely, it was before computers and the internet had really taken off, not that I could have afforded such things. So I went back and endured the hypocrisy having conversations with myself...comments you will not hear.

    I have a way of introducing thought-provoking questions that didn't and don't brand me as an apostate.

    I still remember the time I told another elder's wife that CTR had been influenced greatly by the Adventists just about the time the articles came out in the WT publications on Grews and Storrs. I could see that it had made her think about what she had been told in the past.

    Love, Blondie

  • BonaFide

    I guess I have no conscience.

  • blondie

    Bonafide, you just have to learn how to put a spin on your comments that make people go, "that's a good idea." Don't say that the GB does what it claims it does, just emphasize in some detail what people would see in the congregation if these things were really happening.

    I once brought up how the book study conductors were to work with the publishers from door to door training them knowing full well that these guys would take off in the car with the other elders leaving the MS to run the group. That created some consternation.

    *** km 6/94 p. 1 pars. 5-6 Congregation Book Study Promotes Educational Activities ***


    Meetings for service convenient to the publishers are arranged at most book study locations. These may be for midweek, weekend, or evening witnessing. The book study conductor makes sure that sufficient territory is on hand and that someone will be present to take the lead in the field. Meetings for field service should last no more than 10-15 minutes. The conductor may briefly consider the daily text if it relates to our preaching activity and offer one or two specific field service suggestions or present a brief demonstration of the current offer.


    The conductor endeavors over the course of time to work personally with each one in his group, giving appropriate encouragement and training.—Compare Mark 3:14; Luke 8:1.

    *** km 12/78 p. 3 par. 3 Showing Appreciation for the Congregation Book Study


    Conductors can get to know you better and are in a good position to assist with personal problems, give training in field service and help you with Scriptural questions.

  • sammielee24

    I understand what you are saying..embracing it would be too much for me but I do understand. I have no problem with someone sitting their butt on one of the chairs and using their influence and presence on the inside to get people 'out'. I get that. I can't however, go the step further and embrace the point of those non believers, actually knocking on doors to recruit people into the organization. That to me is the lowest level of integrity...not believing yourself, fully comprehending the damage the org has caused to yourself but then playing the game of active recruitment and possibly destroying another person's life or generations of lives. I'm not saying anyone here does that - I just couldn't do it because I wouldn't want to be guilty of that sort of destruction in someone else's life. I have had JW's sit with me and tell me they don't believe it all, but they want me to join nontheless...that is the greatest hypocrisy because they recognize the ruination it can cause and yet, continue to draw people in without a care.

    If the society were upfront with their doctrines..all their rules..I wouldn't have an issue with adults who join after being given the guidelines because they would clearly be making a more informed choice. This doesn't happen though and too many are recruited into the org without really understanding the freedoms they lose in doing so..and in the end, generations of families are ruined because of it.

    If the manual clearly said that a) you will be disfellowshipped for all of the following and the punishment is shunning which means.......and clearly spell it out - you will not be allowed contact with your child, no contact with your mother, your brother, your grandmother in cases of disfellowshipping or disassociation unless those people are dying b) you must have 2 witnesses to all accusations of molestation, rape or other charges you bring forth against another fellow Witness and those witnesses will not be valid in the course of action unless they are JW's c) we will periodically change the rules as we determine that we should and without any warning or question regarding those changes d) all celebrations including all holidays such as Easter, Memorial Day, Christmas, Thanksgiving, Birthdays are banned on threat of disfellowshipping and shunning. This includes any decorative gestures including candles, wreaths, lights, cards, paper or any other tangible item that could be construed as celebratory in any way e) education, beyond that obtained in public or high school, is considered unneccesary and will not be approved by the WTS. Those who seek further education will have no privileges within the congregation and if they pursue such action, their parent could suffer a loss of his privileges for your actions .....................the list could be pretty long but at least it would be clearcut and less problems all the way around.

    I do understand where you are coming from ......it ain't easy...sammieswife.

  • gubberningbody

    Bf, I think it's a perverse sort of pleasure to be sure. Up till the last meeting I was giving great counsel playing my role in the farce.

    I think of the engagement some have taken like you is like playing a bibley version of Dungeons and Dragons or EverQuest. It's a role-playing game and you are a wizard.

  • leavingwt


    Perhaps you have answered this question elsewhere. If not, I would love to know the answer.

    Have you read Steve Hassan's first book, Combatting Cult Mind Control?


  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    Once you are out, you have lost your greatest tool to help Jehovah's Witnesses. Your abilty to communicate with them.

    While in, you can say stuff in support of the Watchtower that makes you sound like a raving loony cult member and you can be quoting this week's Watchtower or public talk when you do it.

    You can ask people for help on questions they cannot answer while pretending to be 'in love' with the bOrg.

    I blew my chance to get my family out. I went off like a loose cannon when I found out the truth. Now they turn their brain off as soon as I open my mouth.

    If anyone wants to get their family and friends out of this cult, they should seriously consider the option of being the last one out.

    There is nothing hypocritical about that. It is one of the few effective weapons in the war for their freedom.



  • Satanus

    It was a guy somewhat like you, who introduced me to ray franz book, the book which got me out. I don't blame you for staying in and trying to get others out. It's what i did for a year, although i wasn't anywhere near as perspicatious as you, harmless as a sheep and cunning as a snake. You get to keep the old firends, and if you get enough out, then you still have them as friends.

    It takes a lot of.patience. I mean like years, 5 or 10 or more to accomplish what you want. Good luck in trying. Why not make a circle of friends out of the jws, as well? It might be a good transitionary backup, in case you need to bail, at some point.


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