Ex-Elders, how did you resign?

by dismayed 17 Replies latest jw friends

  • dismayed
    dismayed

    This issue is coming up for me soon, the resignation.

    A physical move is out of the question. A hall move might be in the cards. But the most likely scenario is that I will be in the same hall.

    The goal eventually is a fade. How did you resign? Anything you would do differently? How long after you discovered the truth about da troof did you resign? Obviously, I cant take it much longer, but can't send out huge alarm bells.

    The one thing that makes it a little trickier now is the supermeeting. The work of Elders has literally been cut in about half, with no more book study and elimination of two elder talks on the ministry school. I'm thinking more and more that the meeting reduction had a lot to do with elder and MS retention.

  • AllTimeJeff
    AllTimeJeff

    Well, I left my resignation letter for the elders and my letter leaving my wife at the same time.. Probably not the example you want...

    I have followed your story a bit, you must be going through hell bro... I am so sorry....

    I have dealt with 3 resignations besides my own. Honestly, try the depression/stressed out angle, if you feel you can pull it off. It's a guaranteed "keep the wolves at bay" strategy... Maybe say that you can't take dealing with the friends problems anymore, you feel the flock needs better elders, and make it stick... If you do it this way, they will try to talk you out of it. It's a multi week process that way, but after its done, you are much more free to do what you want....

    Any other way, (being upset, personality conflict, or working more...) will draw the elders "you are losing faith" attention, as you well know....

    Hope all goes well!

  • still_in74
    still_in74

    i agree 100%

    the meeting consolidation was purley to "lighten the load" for elders.

    at first the WTS said it was about gas prices, then it was about a new family study night. then why did they include gas prices in the infamous letter? because they were still coming up with a way to disguise the new elder retention plan....

  • SnakesInTheTower
    SnakesInTheTower

    dismayed.... how did I resign? lol

    Like everything I seem to do, my becoming an ex-elder doesn't follow the usual path.

    When I got back from an overseas trip in August 2006, nearly having a nervous breakdown over a broken engagement (on her part), and the general harassment of a particular jackass elder...I verbally resigned but not submitted a written note. The BOE took me off as secretary and Local Building Chairman for our remodel...both I was glad to have taken away. I knew then it was a matter of time.

    We had a CO visit coming up the end of the year..so in October a Quarterly meeting was scheduled to discuss various things... apparently my qualifications were part of that...unfortunately no one bothered to send me an agenda until I received an email with it less than 24 hours from the meeting. Everything had already been discussed in advance. I told the brothers that 24 hours is not enough time to go over the meeting points (prayerfully I believe is the word I used **eye roll**)). I also pointed out that half of the topics were things that should be handled by less than the entire BOE. One of those things was the remodel. Apparently the PO had already taken over in the background before booting me. I tried one more time to talk to one of the elders (and the CO and DO) at a circuit pioneer meeting nearby...to no avail.

    I refused to show up. It was then they decided I no longer qualified as an elder. They accepted my verbal resignation at the next regular Sunday meeting. Then I decided I was going to start my fade....but I couldn't fade and stay there. I planned to change congos, circuits, and states but not phsycially moving away. I realized that the BOE of the prospective new congo wanted me to be an elder there. If I resigned for "personal reasons" then they could reappoint me in a year. It was then that I decided to withdraw the verbal resignation and make my current BOE pull the trigger in front of the CO. Being deleted forces a 3 year moratorium by the Society and then reappointment only as MS for at least 6 months..at least that is the way it was then....

    And so they did. (This is the same BOE that lets its Service Overseer/Regular Pioneer continue in both positions despite the fact that he had been busted for looking at porn..... and despite the fact that he admitted that he wouldnt have come forward except a JW relative (not his wife) had caught him via his internet history while borrowing the computer..... and is involved in a barely legal but morally reprehensible MLM scam. Yet they were willing to boot the MTS grad whom they hated... )

    And so my plan was in place... I was removed..I left...went to the new congo for 8 months or so....made less and less meetings...turned in phantom time through August ...... and then quit going.... the fade complete... now I am just inactive..and never attend.

    As I said... nothing is normal about my life... but the story is out there... I say let your BOE pull the trigger if you are truly done. If you have doubt about leaving...then resign for "personal reasons" and leave on good terms....in case you want that crap job back.

    Snakes ()

    ps..and for you lurkers from my old congo...you know who I am ...come get me ya buggers.

    **flips international hand gesture of disrespect at BOE**

  • truthsetsonefree
    truthsetsonefree

    I was able to resign voluntarily and with the good graces of the body. Crying health concerns and burnout made that possible. I still wanted to make my voice heard however and so I sent an anonymous letter to the GB, Branch office and Service Department. Hint: Get some judicial envelopes before you resign. You can use them to mail your letter and guarantee that it will be opened as they will think it's a DF form. That's what I did and my letter did get through.

    Check out my resignation letter if you'd like: http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/watchtower/beliefs/127812/1/A-Letter-to-the-Governing-Body

    Isaac

  • Blithe Freshman
    Blithe Freshman

    I sent you a pm.

    It was not my fade to post ,but an elder I knew.

    Blithe

  • jabberwock
    jabberwock

    I have a few questions related to Snakes' post in particular, but if anyone else knows the answers please jump in (sorry if they are a little off topic):

    Snakes, why exactly were you removed? What qualifications did you not meet? Was it related to them relieving you of your position as local building chairman and secretary?

    Can elders be removed for turning down responsibilities or giving them up after taking them on?

    Snakes, you also mentioned that one of the elders in your congregation was allowed to continue to serve even though he got caught viewing pornography. Isn't that a disfellowshipping offense?

    jabberwock

  • AudeSapere
    AudeSapere

    Probably not the right move if you are trying to keep contact with family and friends, but there is a well-known 'resignation' that happened a few years ago.

    It's an interesting way to go and there is a link somewhere for the audio file.

    Going Out with a Bang: http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/20680/1/Going-out-with-a-bang

    Good luck with your decision whichever method you choose.

    btw - Welcome to JWN!

    -Aude Sapere (meaning: Dare to Know; Dare to Have Wisdom/Understanding; Dare to Think for Yourself)

  • tooktheredpill
    tooktheredpill

    I was under anti-depressants for years, and only a couple of Elders knew about my condition. After I realized that the Organization was a lie, I told some stuff to a family member, in the privacy of my home. Big mistake. The alarms went off, and I had a huge problem with the rest of the family. After I "fixed the misunderstanding", I had a nervous breakdown. But I saw an open window, and I resigned. I was really depressed and had lost more than 10 pounds in 2 weeks.

    I gave a resignation letter, and I did not had to lie.

    TTRP

  • oompa
    oompa

    My dad resigned without any questions once...just said he really enjoyed serving for 23 years, but that he was dealing with some serious stress and some personal matters and that he felt he needed to step down (or take a break).......no prob, no questions.......five years later he was made an elder again.

    Why not just let your hours drop to 4 or 5 a month? Won't it happen for you then?.........good luck man.........oompa

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