Let's get real about SHUNNING

passwordprotected

A good friend of mine DAd a few months ago because he'd moved in with his 'worldly' g/f and he was already partially being stalked by the local BoE. Since then his mother will have nothing to do with him, neither will his sister and her family. A few of the more real JWs that genuinely care about him have kept a level of contact up. He and his g/f came round to ours a few weeks back and we had a really long chat about the whole situation. She said she'll never understand the shunning. She related that her b/f's niece explained that it's "because we love him that we won't talk to him." Obviously it's a form of love she's never experienced before getting involved with an ex-JW

At my meeting with 2 elders last Sunday I asked them how they will justify walking past me, my wife and our children in the street when they haven't been able to show me from the Bible what I've done wrong against God. They showed me Hebrews 12 about God disciplining those He loves. They explained that by shunning me, they would be lovingly disciplining me.

In reply I said, "C'mon, let's be completely pragmatic about this; do you honestly think that by walking past me in the street, ignoring me and my family, I'm going to think 'yep, I wanna go back'?" They could only shrug and say, "That's how we do it."

My good friend mentioned at the outset told me that every single time he sees a JW shunning him, it just makes him more determined never to return to the KH.

The reality about shunning is that it's nothing more than a loyalty test provided by the GB to all JWs. It does nothing to help 'errant' ones return. And if it does cause them to return, they'll be returning for the wrong reasons!

StAnn

Mark,

Shunning is about controlling the Dubs who are still in. It has nothing to do with "disciplining" those who are errant. It is a scare tactic to keep Dubs from defecting. If they are "forced" to shun others, it makes it painfully clear to them what will happen to them if they choose to go their own way.

For instance, I knew a young woman who did something immoral, ceased that activity, and "confessed" to the elders. She was going to meetings and married a brother in good standing but they still DF'd her for a year. Now, considering that she had ceased her immoral conduct and was back in the fold, attending meetings, what were they trying to accomplish? She's already seen the error of her ways. She'd already repented and come back.

It was to make sure that all of the other young people in the KH saw that, if you stray, you will be publicly humiliated. It was a control tactic against the others. It had nothing to do with "showing love" to the young woman.

There is no such thing as forgiveness in the WTS Cult.

Serena

passwordprotected

@ serena - exactly my point; test the loyalty and control the 'flock' into the bargain.

Mickey mouse

It's purpose is twofold.

1. A sword of damocles to keep members in line. Fear of isolation.

2. Control of information. No totalitarian organization allows defectors to communicate with people inside the group.

Love has nothing to do with it. Hate would be closer to it.

StAnn

Love has nothing to do with it. Hate would be closer to it.

MM -

Exactly. How many times have we heard Dubs in "good standing" saying horrible things about DF'd ones? If they were merely waiting for them to return to the fold, you'd think they'd be more loving.

Most Dubs I've seen act as if they hate DF'd ones.

Serena

Octarine Prince

I am still laughing inside at the fact that only elders, their wives, and their children shun me, but others are like "we miss you! When are you coming back?"

Uh, never.

(Oh, my friend's ex-wife shuns me, too, but I think she would shun me regardless! Plus, I re-shun her ass right back.)

Open mind

passwordprotected:

it just makes him more determined never to return to the KH.

For people like you, the JWs then get to do their superior dance.

"They were not of our sort".

DFing keeps the congregation "clean".

om

LongHairGal

Passwordprotected,

I am sorry for what you are experiencing with the stupid shunning routine. I am considered inactive and even when I was active in the religion a certain clique of family members ignored me to some degree. Somebody's nose was out of joint so they figured if they 'ignored' me and told their family members to do so maybe I would go running up to them and say something. Guess what? I never did. I just acted as if I didn't notice. I wonder if this made somebody angry. Ha, ha. They should have come up to me and tapped me on the shoulder and said: 'you are shunned'.

I also feel their shunning routine would not make a straying person want to return. If anything it would keep them away.

This has nothing whatsoever to do with love. I see their shunning routine as a control tactic which didn't work on me.

LHG

leavingwt

PasswordProtected:

Remember this true statement: "Cults shoot their wounded."

-LWT

mcsemike

Dear password:

You hit the nail on the head. It does NOT make people go back because of any "love". It ruins people, their families, their health. People have committed suicide because of shunning.

The WT once printed an article in the 1950's bemoaning the fact that in our times, the WT didn't have the authority to kill apostates. Yes, that's what they said. I wonder what they would be thinking while they shot their mother or father just because the GB said to do it.

These lunatics are as dangerous as Jim Jones. I don't approve of violence to innocent rank and file, but the persecution in Russia and other countries is long overdue.

I always ask them: "Would Jesus do this? Can you see him doing something he knew would destroy a person's family and health?" They don't give a damn. So when Brooklyn is leveled and gone, I don't give a damn.

Let's get real about SHUNNING

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