confession

by Mulan 31 Replies latest jw friends

  • Englishman
    Englishman

    When Santa came down our chimney, I left a girlie book for him to read.

    He had to wait an hour before he could get back up the chimney.

    Englishman.

    Nostalgia isn't what it used to be....

  • Abaddon
    Abaddon

    As people might gather I am rather of the 'won't believe it unless I see it and preferably touch, poke, examine it from all angles, then stick it in a box and post to someone else and have them repeat the process, then compare notes, then decide if I believe it' mentality.

    However, I am looking forward to my ninth Christmas. I think Christmas is fab. This will be the second year I've had a tree!

    I know kids can get pissy when they find out the truth, but I firmly believe fantasy is part of childhood. Thus the tooth fairy and Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Glastonbury Fairy (my own personal invention), Plectrum Elves (why do you think you can never find a plectrum?) and Sock Pixies are essential.

    Later on they can grow up and discover plectrums disappear all the time because they slip through time-space disconuitities instead of believing in elves, like any sensible adult.

    To deny Santa his few years in the sun seems almost to accept the Borg line on Christmas being bad, which is SUCH crap I can't say.

    Here in Holland there is Sinterklas as well as Santa Claus.

    He's a bishop who lives in Spain with Black Peter (a character that would be impossible to have in a country less relaxed about race-relations, and is singular even though there are lots of them), and has a horse he delivers the presents on. He's left a glass of Schnaps (I think), and a carrot for his horse!

    People living in glass paradigms shouldn't throw stones...

  • ozziepost
    ozziepost

    Abaddon,

    I think I like your country! Sounds kinda quaint but nice. Enjoy!

    Cheers,
    Ozzie

    "It's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness."
    Anonymous

  • outnfree
    outnfree

    Mulan,

    I was the GIRL (Ozziepost!) who was told by a BOY in fourth grade that there was no such thing as Santa Claus! I was crushed, devastated, extremely upset and unwilling to believe that Santa was a lie. He said, "Look it up in the dictionary!" and sure enough, it said Santa was ficticious and a role played by parents. I felt betrayed by them, too, and foolish for having believed so long...

    Kinds of reminds me of the way I felt when I discovered that the Watch Tower Bible and Tract Society was not the benign and warm mouthpiece of God. I was crushed, devastated, extremely upset and unwilling to believe that the faithful and discreet slave was a lie.
    I looked it up -- on the internet and in books -- and sure enough, the Society as God's mouthpiece with special insight was ficticious and a role played by [deceitful] old men. I felt betrayed by them, and foolish once again for having believed so long...

    outnfree

    When the truth is found to be lies
    and all the joy within you dies ...
    -- Darby Slick, Somebody to Love

  • garybuss
    garybuss

    Thanks Mulan, All,

    I remember Christmas when I was about 4 and I have a picture of my parents and grandparents celebrating my 4th birthday with a cake with candles.

    The Santa Claus story was my introduction to magical thinking and was a stepping stone in my indoctrination into theism. Faith (belief without proof) was established by adults I trusted telling me there was an entity that was able to watch me and reward me for good behavior. That was reenforced on Christmas morning when the new coaster wagon was under the Christmas tree. I was gone. I was a believer.

    Now it was a small step to tell me there was a bigger Santa Claus in the sky with a book to write down my actions and reward me or punish me. I already had accepted the concept and established the thought process. All they had to do is change the names of the players - Santa = God. No problem. That concept was so deep in me it took decades to purge.

    Hope you all are having a great day. Snowing big time here in Dakota.

    gb

  • Julie
    Julie

    Marilyn, you break my heart with your tale. I can just picture you as an adorable little girl with a broken heart. Wish I could give you a hug even though the hurt was long ago.

    As to the Santa thing, I told my kids and they believed. They are older now and know better. They were reluctant to admit they didn't believe anymore because they thought they wouldn't get all the presents anymore. Don't you just love kids? I spoil them as bad as ever every year. It's one of few times I can indulge them.

    They suffered no trauma from believing in Santa or finding out it wasn't true. In fact, my son of the analytical mindset probably never fully believed anyway. It was fun while it lasted.

    Enjoy the holidays with your Princess and everyone--
    Love to all
    Julie

  • joelbear
    joelbear

    The Santa story is like any story. When I was a kid I used to have dreams I could fly like Peter Pan. Kids believe Mickey Mouse is real too. Do witness parents at DisneyWorld make a point of saying. Now kids, it would be a lie to let you believe Mickey Mouse is real. There is really a short, possibly unattractive person in that suit, or even go backlot to get pictures of headless mice to be sure there children know the truth.

    Santa is just a part of children's active imaginations, like any other fictional children's character. Harmless.

    Joel

  • Eric
    Eric

    Mulan,

    Of course Santa is real.

    I am almost 43 years old and I have a friend who is in his Fifties. Two decades ago we became friends, he has pulled my feet from the fire on more than one occasion. I have stood by him when he's had troubles as best as I've been able.

    When he was two he was separated from his mother, and he was raised by his grandparents. He recalls happy christmasses from his child hood, turkey and cookies, presents under the tree, from his gramma and grampa, uncles, aunts, and always one "from Santa". He was about six or seven when he figured out it wasn't really from Santa, it was from his mom.

    When he was fourteen, the family situation had changed, and he was reunited with his mother, step-dad, and now, five step-sisters. Now he got presents "from Mom" and "from Dad" but always still a little gift "from Santa" which he knew was from his mother, but it was kept as an unspoken secret between them.

    After he moved out on his own, he still went home for every christmas day, and after moving three time zones away, he still flew home for every christmas, and still found some small gift "from Santa" under the tree, even when he'd turned fifty. And he cherishes the sentiment that gift represented.

    This year, his mother got sick, and died. He was at her side through her last weeks. He was capped and gowned in the OR as they tried to help her. He was holding her hand when she finally rested.

    So now he faces the first christmas he can remember without the prospect of a gift "from Santa".

    But I am certain that Santa will somehow pull through for my friend, and sneak a small gift under the tree for him. After all, I've read Santa's list...

    Eric

  • Seeker4
    Seeker4

    Great stories here from everyone. Thanks, Mulan.

    I think it is absolutely necessary for all of us to have a mythology of sorts to guide us and help us through life. Santa is great for kids, and most are smart enough to figure it out. We all need some fun and magic. My granddaughter had a Barbie party last Friday - ten little girls with assorted moms and grandmoms. She told me I couldn't come as Ken - "Because he's not real, he's just pretend." She's four, and has it figured out.

    The problem comes when people start believing that the mythology is fact and reality. Then it's called religion - and fundamentalism is its most mindless expression - as all us X-JWs know!

    A funny story about Santa. Last year my grandaughter - who is being raised a Witness - had all these arguments with her Mom about whether Santa was coming to her house. My daughter told her not that Santa didn't exist, but that he wouldn't be coming to her house because they didn't celebrate Xmas. One day they were driving out of the mall and there is a Santa waving to everyone, and he gives my granddaughter a big wave and smile.

    "See! I TOLD you Santa Claus knew me!" my granddaughter told her mother triumphantly.

    S4

  • Esmeralda
    Esmeralda

    Hi Marilyn,

    *hug* to you for your story...

    Just a little bit here on me, my daughter, and the Santa thing.

    My (JW) parents never bothered to mention to me about Santa, so when I went to pre-school at the age of 4 and heard the story, I didn't believe it *lol* I got in the car one day after class and said to my mom "You're not gonna believe this. The kids told me there is some fat guy with a beard who rides in this sled that a bunch of bambis make go and he gives presents to all the kids in the whole world in one night."

    *lol* A born skeptic I guess! My mom explained to me then, and honestly, as a kid I never 'missed' Christmas. I didn't know any better. I really didn't want to celebrate it until I had my own child and was out of the org.

    Since we just had our first Christmas tree last year, when my daughter saw Santa on tv and asked who he was, I told her the truth. She is big-time into knowing how things 'really' work and I knew if I tried to tell her the tale, it wouldn't fly. I figured that starting out at that age with Christmas, it would be a better lesson for her to know that her gifts come from the hard work of those who love her, not from some fictitious benevolent bearded stranger.

    If she were really little...I'm not sure what I'd tell her.

    Incidentally, I had no idea that my daughter had, at so young an age, already figured out Mickey Mouse. Recently she said to me "You know, Mom, that there are people in the Mickey outfits." My heart sank. She's just turning six next month and already, she knows that.

    But then as they said in Monsters Inc. kids are becoming "harder to scare" and I believe also harder to convince of anything.

    Maybe that's the saddest part of all. The innocence of childhood is something really rare these days.

    One thing I did do was make sure that she knows not to spoil the story for other kids. She wouldn't want to be the one to disappoint them. She's also giving a toy to Toys for Tots so that another child can have a happy Christmas morning. When I asked her if she thought that was a good idea, she said to me "Maybe we can give more than one, Mom. I have so many toys already."

    : )

    *hugs* to you Mulan!

    love
    essie

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