I re-entered the Matrix

by digderidoo 51 Replies latest jw friends

  • digderidoo

    Good point Sirona. I guess i have always looked at individual dubs as good people.


  • digderidoo
    Why would anyone with a clear mind want to be part of a faith that forbids family members (when dfd) to even speak to one another?

    That is an issue that i now have, as i said at the start of the thread. When that ' sister ' got on the platform and said what she did, i thought to myself this is not Christian thinking.


  • Quandry

    ) A 'sister' was being interviewed from the platform. She told how she felt so much pressure to go to university. She wanted to go into pharmacy. To cut a long story short, you guessed it she gave it all up to pioneer. The interview ended with, ' and what job do you do now?', she replied, ' i work in a coffee shop part time', immediately the audience applauded. What??, i thought. Am i missing something here???

    I used to cringe when I heard these things repeated time and time again from the Conventions and the platform in the KHall. I so wanted to get an education. I loved to learn. But my husband was an elder and of course, we couldn't set a bad example. But I had a daughter-a very smart one. Always on the honor role. Small and delicate, I knew she was not cut out for housecleaning or waitressing.

    Well, that problem was solved for us when five "loving shepherds" told her at sixteen that she was a liar and filth in God's eyes after doing (for the first time) some normal teenage stuff and disfellowshipped with the words, "You are disfellowshipped, and if you are still disfellowshipped when Armageddon comes, you can take some comfort in knowing that Jehovah can read hearts."

    Even with this, with therapy,she graduated high school as an honor role student, in the Latin Honor Society. Now in college, she is on the President's list, honor role, and a member of Phi Theta Kappa. I am, at 56, a student in college, and on the Honor Role and President's list. My husband works at an honorable but low paying job and deeply regrets not getting an education.

    What do you suppose your kids absorbed from the meeting?

  • LouBelle

    digderidoo - you were one poster I had wondered about - where had you disappered - well now I know. The emotional side of me would beg, plead and try prove every doctrine of the JWs false - but I'm over that now.

    Do yourself the favour and stick to what you've said here - examine with a clear head the facts - do some good research for yourself - only then can you make an informed decision.

    You can still have your spirituallity filled, you don't need to go to a building/church/religion to get that. As you grow you will see a number of ways that this can be done.

    I hope that you do examine the facts though.

  • snowbird

    Paul, there's a special place in my heart for those with alcohol issues. I'm so happy to hear that you are getting the best of yours.

    My dad was an alcoholic from the West - different from all the rest! He was the salt of the earth when sober, but give him a drink, and voila! an ogre appeared. I loved him very much and wished I could have helped him, but I was only a child when my mother left him for good. After realizing fully what he must have gone through, I vowed that I would be more understanding of anyone with that problem.

    A month ago I received a commendation from my boss for my sensitive and kind handling of a person cited for a DUI offense. He was so inebriated that he had to be hospitalized. After he was released from the hospital, it was my job to call him and inform him of the citation.

    He was so polite and contrite that I felt like crying, but of course, I had to remain professional. He later told the people at the jail how much he appreciated my treating him with such dignity and respect.

    I'm telling you all of this because I've come to admire your frankness and honesty in dealing with your issues. However, I do know that the JW's are not the answer. They will give you a few months to get your life in order, and after that, you will be marginalized and regarded with suspicion if you don't measure up.

    At this stage in your goal of conquering your addiction, do you really need that? If I were you, I would channel my quest for spirituality in another direction. You seem to have a love for children. Is there a way you can mentor or tutor some of them? Kids will accept and like you for your efforts with no strings attached.

    Anyway, whatever your decision is, remember this: You are the boss of you. Don't allow anyone else to take that away from you. Ever.


  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite


    I get nostalgic for the "good old days" in "the truth" sometimes too... and I'm still 'in', going through the motions, and have no alcohol problems. JWs have lost what little appeal they had. No social gatherings are allowed like we used to do. Even more pressure and mind control than before. Everyone is tired, stressed, and the carrot is farther out of reach than ever. I think that most 'friendly relationships' in the bOrg are co-dependancy or something far less than genuine friendship.

    Perhaps when I was younger, 607 would have been an issue for me. But now that their "this generation" was changed yet again recently. Every single one of their "last days" prophecies is full of BS. I don't need to prove anything, time has done that. Anything they promote or teach is suspect and cannot be trusted as a decision-making guide.

    Hopefully your last few visits to the Matrix have helped you to understand the damaging role a false belief system has played in your life. I wish you the best as you look to the future.

    B the X

  • changeling

    Hi darlin!

    I can't believe I'm going to say this, but here goes: I totally agree with oompa!!!

    Now, that's a lesson in the value of sobriety and a clear mind!

    Keep up the good work with your drinking issues and keep using your brain. When you look at the WT objectively you can't help but the see the unhealthy control they extert over their members. All other issues aside ,this should make you want to run in the opposite direction.

    Welcome back!

    changeling :)

  • digderidoo

    Something else i forgot to mention.

    At the end of the convention i was walking back to the car with my kids. A few feet in front of me was an elder who i hadn't seen for about 20 years.

    His son was a couple of years older than me, last i heard he moved to Italy. Anyway the conversation went on something lke this,

    Me, ' so how's xxxx doing?'

    Elder with a look of concern, ' not very well at all, he's not been doing too good.'

    Me ( thinking he's ill or something), "Why, what's the matter with him?"

    Elder, " he's got the......" then i couldn't make out the rest, cus of noise, etc.

    Here i was, didn't want to ask again, seriously thinking he's ill. But i went on,

    Me, " he's got what?"

    Elder, "he's got the trappings of the world"

    Me looking bemused and dazed, "oh"

    Elder, " yes he's in Italy, he's got a job with loads of money, big car and it's lead him astray"

    Well you could have knocked me over with a feather. Any normal father would be so proud to see their son doing well. But no, he paints it as a terminal disease.


  • changeling

    When my son was a senior in high school, witness friends would ask me what his plans were. I would say: "He's going to college". They would look at me with a pained expression. You'd of thought I said: "He's going to prison", or some other awful thing. Never once did anyone say something like: "How wonderful", or "Good for him!".

    changeling :)

  • VoidEater

    there is a spiritual side to me, but i don't think the org can fulfill this.

    Tis a big world full of posisbilities. It's hard to see them when you've been told there's only one right way to worship...

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