Does the JW mindset ever leave totaley leave you ?????

karter

I was 38 years in left 7 years i find myself still in the mindset sometimes maybe becouse wife and some family are still in but can you ever fully ''check out and leave"

wow...could you please tell me how you adjust to prob totatally different friends and such....you and your wife? how do you cope with her still in a cult? how much freedom do you have? or do you have to lead a double life apart from your jw wife?...like do you have an apostaphone? can you have friends over that are not dubs? what about ex dubs?.....7 years and still with the missus......could really use some input here....and

I also wonder if the mindset ever leaves totally...but i hope not....some of it seems good to me......oompa

shamus100

Hi,

I was only in for five years, and it has completely left me. 38 years is a different story - I hope so.

Wishing you all the best....

yknot

I was always told once a JWkid always a JWkid........indoctrination through repetition.

For instance, I say "Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as ----?

Intstantly your brain should already know the next word if not the rest of the story.....

Or que the music: " From house to house from ---- to ----".....see infuriating isn't it....I can even see the page number in my mind's eye!

Since your wife is still 'in' I would think that there is a level of your brain that remains "inactive" versus DAd. Associations have strong influences in our lives.

So far I am not beating myself up for retaining some JW thinking....after all it is all I have ever known or actively practiced.

One day at a time......

WTWizard

Obviously, those who were born in or there the majority of their childhoods are going to have a much harder time clearing it out than those who were in it for a couple of years as adults. You have those Kingdumb Maladies that will be in your head all the time (again, those born-ins with no exposure to real music are going to have it much worse than those who listened to real music as children).

This parallels the doctrinal effects. I have been pxxxed off too many times by the Washtowel Slaveholdery, so I am willing to go blatantly against their doctrines whether or not I believe them. However, quite a few posters on this board are still afraid of doing certain things that are against the religion, and probably will always be to some extent. That, like the prevalence of Kingdumb Maladies in your head, will decline with time.

Other effects are much harder to dismiss, and may still be with you at the root source. Most people have to worry about getting busted and disfellowshipped. There are shunnings of family members and friends. Some have their whole lives entangled within the Washtowel Slaveholdery--anyone with an employer or landlord that is a witless is likely to have that problem with losing more than religion if they question the belief system of the Filthful and Disgraceful Slavebugger. And there are those who have had hounders show interest in hosting them--single "brothers" with zero prospects are the biggest targets for that Value Destroyer Training School. Getting hounded is always a real threat.

While the mindset might diminish, some of these other effects might not.

Junction-Guy

What little JW mindset I had left, completely vanished from me on the night I discovered the real truth about "The Truth"

There is not one iota of fear about their doctrines or their cult, I believe it is a total lie.

So yes, the JW mindset can wear out.

LockedChaos

I was born in for 27 years.
Been out for 25 years.
It's all still there and sometimes it
comes crashing back, usually when least
expected.

When I began reading "Crisis of Conscience" out
of nowhere my brain began chanting "You
shouldn't read this, you shouldn't read this!!
Apostate, Apostate!!

Just kept moving forward and it soon turned
to a murmur the completely left.

Weird Huh.

blondie

Actually, changing the vocabulary is hard. So many ex-jws find it hard to stop saying "the truth." Or like "marital arrangement" or "young ones." Because I do the review I am continually exposed to the lingo and have to inoculate myself or find substitute words.

It actually is good to do research on basic doctrines and determine your current beliefs.

Blondie

james_woods

It is sort of like a toothache, or a bad cold.

There will come that one fine morning when you are just doing something else entirely, and then later that day you remember that you have not thought about the JW mess at all.

But, no - just like your ex-wife: the pain goes away after a while, but you will still remember it all, and be a wiser person for it.

James - and I have approved this message!

redredrose

All the responses to this question are good, all have something to offer.

But what about what Oompa said? How do you adjust when you are married to someone who still buys into the JW system? Especially if you are determined to keep your marriage intact - what about new friends? While I've been inactive for several years I still use the lingo, my friends are still active JW's.

How have some of you guys manage to make new friends without upsetting your husband/wife?

Does the JW mindset ever leave totaley leave you ?????

Share this