So in 30 years, Adam never thought of eating from the tree of life

Mr Ben

Ok, does this thing sound right to you?

2 special trees, middle of the garden, 30 years messin' about (at least according the Spineless and Shivering Slave) blah blah blah .... and it never occured to the dumb twat to eat from the tree of life? What a dumbass! No wonder his supposed descendents never noticed God lied about the whole thing and the serpent actually told the truth!

Kinda reminds me of the Frank Zappa song: Dumb all over, A little ugly on the side... Dumb all over, A little ugly on the side... Dumb all over, A little ugly on the side... Dumb all over, A little ugly on the side...

StAnn

You silly guy. Don't you know Adam was too busy naming all of the animals, giving them their scientific names, to even notice the fruit?

Bring_the_Light

2 special trees, middle of the garden, 30 years messin' about (at least according the Spineless and Shivering Slave) blah blah blah .... and it never occured to the dumb twat to eat from the tree of life?

How many years did you spend in the borg before you got a keen idea? .... those who throw stones.....

Adam didn't have internet access yet, Al Gore didn't invent that until 6,000 years after it would have provided crucial information.

Bring_the_Light

loosie

he was too busy finding out that none of the animals made a suitable companion for him.

yknot

He just needed a patsy to take the blame....

Gen 3:12 “The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me [fruit] from the tree and so I ate.” (NWT)

Indo_Dude

Adam was already a fruit. Eve was his fag hag. After a night of celebrating down at the White Party Eden Club, Eve's sweet tooth kicked in and she told Adam if he didn't eat the fruit with her, she wouldn't give him Steve's treehouse number she had gotten earlier at the club. Adam was still a little foggy from the hemp grass he had just named, and become a fan of, relented....cause, dang that Steve was smokin hot!

This enraged Jehoover, who promptly forced Adam to marry his fag hag, and all the resulting generations as well, so that man and woman would be completely incomaptiable (as they were designed to be originally) yet inisplicably drawn to each other. As further punishment just so that straight people would not forget this covenant/punishment God would create 5% of the population as gay, as he had always intended, just to rub it in.

JK666

The big question is, how long did it take him to want to eat Eve?

JK

JK666

Mr B,

Quoting Zappa, tres cool!

JK

JK666

IF MAN IS DUMB, THEN GOD IS DUMB!

JK

WTWizard

He was a slave to an Almighty Slavebugger. He was not able to do his own thinking, which would have set the stage for God to provide "new light" and ban anything that would have led to their pleasure. (Not all at once, just as the situations came up.) Satan saw that, and had to do his thinking for him that once, to enable Adam to do his own thinking to improve his lot in life. So Satan offered the fruit, hoping to spare man from a potential tyranny where anything pleasurable would have been banned.

So in 30 years, Adam never thought of eating from the tree of life

Share this