New family situation, and I'm HOT!!!

by bluesbreaker59 22 Replies latest jw experiences

  • bluesbreaker59

    He won't be in front of a JC, because he's been inactive for so long, and no longer claims he's a witness.

    BTW, I live about 10 miles from my aunt, I'm the closest family member, and you can bet that I'm not afraid of my tiny, little scumbag uncle, who suffers terribly from "short man's disease". He's about 5'6 and 165. BTW, I'm about 5'10 and 270 (mostly solid), (did I mention I play in a bar band?, and was a farm kid?) My cousin is tough as nails, and meaner than a rabid badger, he has a temper like the Devil, and he's 6'3 and about 270 (totally solid), oh yeah, he's also served hard time and works at a saw mill. So together we're a 500 lb. wrecking crew, that's been in more fights than I can count.

    My aunt told me that my uncle hasn't been seen since he got released from jail. I told her to call me ASAP if he shows up. I know he's scared of my cousin and I showing up on him.

  • wednesday

    So sorry to hear this. Your uncle can face a JC even if he has been inactive for years. It all depends of the elders.

  • Renegade

    If I'd have been there. "WHAM!" "BAM!" "SLAM!" Then I'd be found unconcious the next day.

  • Bring_the_Light
    BLUESBREAKER- What the hell ? Your aunt shouldn't be facing a JC for any charges her a$$wipe of a husband should , for christ's sakes ! I'm with Quirky here - there is never any excuse for pounding or hitting a woman ! The husband should be sitting in a committee meeting as we speak - that's how fast they should pull his a$$ into one ! Not only that if he struck her - she would really help herself by pressing charges of assault - then they'd put him in jail where he belongs !

    I dunno, pretty sure in JWland, she still owes "wifely dues" between beatings, or else when he cheats she'll be JC'd for that too. Best bet is to put out, learn some defensive boxing moves, and pray he slips up and does something divorcable. Yep, that's what a good christian would do.

  • R.Crusoe

    It's my belief that some societies imprison man and wife in a veritable hell of a marriage.

    When angst and trauma degenerates a relationship to the level of violent reactions and outbursts, my view is that each should be advised that these are the danger signs signalling a better solution to be divorce. Maybe that way more would get divorced and have far less trauma before moving on?

    The idea god wants them to be handcuffed for life is sick IMO!

  • milligal


    Here's the sad truth. My ex used to beat me (he was JW pioneer, ministerial servant yada yada yada). He was actually arrested and fined in court for domestic violence and abuse and neglect of a minor. He had to go to anger management which he referred to as his 'men's group'. Oh yeah, and he's still a witness-in good standing. The support I received from the congregation? The elders followed me to work and to the car dealership, Bibles in hand to tell me that God hates a divorcing. The JW's are a man led group, women have few rights. 'If he beats you, you married him, you made your bed...'

    I truly feel for your Aunt. She is lucky to have you, since she will need some support and hopefully, this will be the beginning of a revelation to her. If she gets out she will have a chance at retreiving some of her dignity and sense of self worth. Best wishes.

    By the way, it totally cracks me up that you call them the Borg. I'll have to use that one....

  • Tired of the Hypocrisy
    Tired of the Hypocrisy

    My sissy called the cops and had her abuser jailed. The elders didn't try to df her, but they did push for reconsiliation. From what I have read here though is that these things all hinge on the po and local boe. The wt claims to be united under God but they sure leave a lot of latitude for the undereducated, dimwitted boe's to do as they goddamn well please.

    Someone should put a hit out on that puto uncle of yours.

  • jamiebowers

    Your jw family did what they were supposed to do according to WTB&TS rules. They aren't supposed to get involved in marital problems. When I called my jw mom to ask if I could hide out from my extremely abusive jw husband, she said no. I freaked out on the elders, and the po told my mom it was ok to give me temporary shelter. Of course, they encouraged me to reconcile with him, be a better wife and wait on Jehovah. In the meantime and for the next six years, my jw husband hit me, terrorized me by driving into oncoming traffic and later threatened to kill me and then himself. He was forcibly committed to mental insitutions twice. Doctors and judges believed that he would follow through and kill me. When I filed for divorce and he was locked up against his will in the looney bin, three elders made an unannounced visit to my home. Again I was advised to reconcile, be a better wife and wait on Jehovah. I refused and said that I was going through with the divorce. They then advised me that I could not remarry unless I could prove adultery on his part. At this point I was just about as crazy as he was. I'd lived in a constant state of fear for six and a half years. No, I didn't have a boyfriend. But I was so desperate to get and stay away from him that I absolutely refused to hang around to see if a. he was going to kill me or b. he was going to commit adultery. I offered to da myself, but they df'd me instead. I don't know if the three elders coming to my house was a judicial committee or not, but they seemed awfully accusatory at the time. I got the distinct impression that his abusive behavior was my fault, despite the fact that my husband at the time admitted his wrong doing and told them he was repentent time after time after time. Oh, and some of the other sins he freely admitted to: buying pornography and beating me for it and giving himself blow jobs, (yes, guys, he really could do it to himself...kind of like a dog). Anyway, I filed for divorce and was so desperate to get away from him that I did not ask for alimony and walked away from my home and the vast majority of my possessions. I lost association with my brother and my mother in the process.

    So, a jc probably isn't that far away for your aunt. The WTB&TS looks down on jws who bring worldly authority into the picture. And they love to df people for whom they have no solution other than to endure the abuse. I am no longer afraid of that lunatic, because I know he is a coward, and the fact that I have a husband who would love to snap him in half doesn't hurt either . Good luck to you and your aunt. I hope somebody has the opportunity to kick her husband's ass. And I hope she and the kids get the hell out of the cult and the marriage, since both are equally damaging.

  • bluesbreaker59

    Well, I had lots of time to think last night, and I'm not sure how to handle this all. I love my aunt and her kids dearly, I also fear for their safety from that wacko. I truly despise the man, but I can't just go out and beat him up. That only does one thing... It would get me a criminal record. My cowardly uncle is the type that is just looking to sue, so I know he'd press charges. I'm trying to talk my cousin down too, but he's pretty set on just beating him down.

  • dinah


    You made the right decision. Beating him senseless would feel great, but you would get a domestic charge. That is something you don't want following you around. Background checks won't tell of the circumstances, just your reaction.

    It is true the elders will tell your aunt to be a better wife and maybe she won't get beaten. They actually told a friend of mine whose husband continually watched porn, that if she would take care of his needs better he would need the porn. It's that "still under Jewish law" mentality they hold to so dearly. Women are basically property.

    The advice for your aunt to document everything is VERY important. Every threat should be reported, especially since she has a restraining order. Of course, restraining orders are rarely worth the paper they are written on. If a violent man violates a restraining order, the damage is done before the police can get there.

    Just make sure you aunt knows she has your support. Maybe the way her Dub familiy members are treating her will help her wake up. One can only hope.

    (Or she could make him some breakfast, grits cause 3rd degree burns if placed correctly.)*kidding!!

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