Please Share your Experiences of Abusive Judicial Committee Meetings

by flipper 29 Replies latest jw friends

  • dinah

    Wonder how many elders in the South are met with saw-off shotguns at the door?

    The last shepherding call I had will be my last. There were beer bottles everywhere and I had a hang-over. We had a BIG party the night before. Elder said something about some "lifestyle" changes I needed to make. I told him I was just biding my time until Armageddon so I could die. They left quickly!

    The whole elder arrangement is so cliquish. One elder in my congregation molested his daughters. He was removed from the position, but never really punished. Another elder was abusive to his wife and children. Last I heard, neither of these fine upstanding men's kids are doing very well.

    I really feel for people who are losing their families because of questions they have about the organization. The teenaged girls who have to answer probing questions have my sympathy too.

    Probably if I would have cried, they would have extended some "mercy". They couldn't have made me cry if they had driven nails in my feet. I think they took my lack of emotion personally. Looking back, I'm so proud of myself for not crying! The "death sentence" they handed out really just gave me a new life. Just took a while to find it.

  • faundy

    I'm still waiting for a JC, or perhaps they had it and I wasn't there. Kind of gutted really, it would have been fun.

  • aSphereisnotaCircle

    At fifteen I was interrogated by three elders after i accused my step-father of assaulting me sexually.

    Those three old goats, sitting in a semi circle around me, firing sexually explicit questions at me was a rape in itself.

    What stuns me to this day is that none of those men ever checked up on me after that.

    They told me that they couldn't do anything about it because it was his word against mine, they also forbade me to speak to anyone else about it. So they refused to help me, plus they made sure i could not seek help elsewhere, and then they never checked up on me again!

    It still just blows my mind how they can treat children in that manner............... I just cannot get my mind around it

  • seek2find

    Welcome Candlelight, you have a PM. seek2find

  • flipper

    GREGOR- I'm so sorry that you have beat yourself up over these things friend. Just remember , as an elder you did what you were trained to do. The society was working through you and using you as well in a bad way. They controlled you ; just like we were all controlled. Don't berate yourself - it was not your fault.

    WT WIZARD- I know you will blow off your JC bro ! LOL!

    TIRED of the HYPOCRISY- That is terrible how your relative was abused ! 6 months before they contacted her ? And she was raped - then DFed for it ? That is just disgusting. I'm speechless.

    LOOKING NOW 25- I too could never figure out how it was the elders felt they had a right to judge others.

    PENNY 2- That was a good decision on your part to not give the elders any more power over you ! I too feel for young people going through this.

    DREW SAGAN- I remember your situation well. I really admired how you and your wife handled yourselves and stood up for what you believe in . I so agree with you that stronger , more forceful elders influence the more timid elders to fall in line and go along with their views. I hope you and your wife are in a more peaceful place friend.

    MARY- So you had the goods on the elders in your congregation, eh ? I understand why they let you fade. Nothing like grabbing a female tigress by the tail ! LOL! It would have come back to bite them in the rear. But believe me - being in front of a 3 man JC is very different than just 2 elders talking to you. The tension escalates in droves , and imagine sitting in front of 6 elders at an appeal meeting .

    CANDLELIGHT- Excellent first post ! Welcome to the board Candlelight ! I am totally shocked by how you were treated ! It is disgusting . You were barred from entering the Kingdom Hall ? That is so bizarre ! I guess the elders REALLY wanted to control you ! I'm glad you got out friend. I look forward to more of your posts !

    DINAH- You have seen a lot of things in your life. I bet you could eat those elders for breakfast. You are right the JC is about abuse of power , and taking advantage of their power to abuse others.

    BREAKING AWAY- It sounds like you were a great elder ! I too saw lots of shady things happen in my 44 years in the organization. I saw so many political games played between people. It really started me doubting.

    COON DAWG- They harassed you for liking rock ' n roll music? It would probably liven up their meetings ! Don't feel bad about calling the elders names. I too cussed at elders once calling them "a$$oles" and told them to leave my property. Sorry you experienced these things.

    UNDERCOVER- Man - they really did try to control you ! Your grooming, house, even your neck tie ? Jeez. I agree with you I saw them play favorites with the good old boys too !

    FAUNDY- I hope you never have to go through a JC !

    ASPHERE IS NOT A CIRCLE- I'm so sorry you were treated that way sis. These sick elders ask sexually explicit questions which are none of their business . And they typically give a lack of support. I hope you have healed some my friend

  • flipper

    Just wanted to bump this up for people who work during the week - and see if anybody has experiences they wanted to share ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • loosie

    ((hugs)) restrangled I'm sorry you had to go through that.

    Mary : "Mary Mary quite contrary" I bet that is the nickname the elders gave you behind your back. Isn't it great to be a thinking woman among a group of unthinking JW men?

  • restrangled

    I just want to add that after getting professional counseling in my late 20' was diagnosed as "Spiritual Rape" by the JC committees. Not just by one professional but many. Another called it a "Mind Fuxk".....

    Thought some of you might enjoy the diagnosis by outsiders.

  • loosie

    My hubby';s therapist reffered to it as Mind F*** as well.

  • flipper

    LOOSIE- It is horrible what the witnesses did to Restrangled. I bet Mary did put the elders through their paces and kept them on their toes !

    RESTRANGLED- It is very telling and exposing of the JW cult - that a number of professional counselors told you that you were " spiritually raped ". It definitely was a " mind f%ck " ! Peace out, Mr. Flipper

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